Matilda Wren by When Ravens Fall Page B

tell her that he cared, that she wasn’t alone anymore, but he couldn’t. He had never made such declarations to anyone before. He didn’t know how to. They had never kissed and she bantered with him like two mates would. He wasn’t even sure if she liked him, like he liked her.
    It made him nervous around her. He couldn’t be the loud brash vulgar form of his self that he was so used to, because she just laughed at him. It made him feel like he was three foot tall.
    She found his drug dealing appealing, but that was as far as the wannabe mol went. Rachel was not impressed by the status of being Sean Fergus’ girlfriend and often teased him for his female admirers. She saw through the bad boy image and caught sight of something else. Sean didn’t know what it was but it had made her stay; made her spend every minute she could with him.
    “Rach?”
    “What?” She kept staring out the window He wanted to tell her how he felt. He wanted to shout it out but he just couldn’t find the words. It was like something was physically preventing his mouth from forming the sounds. His silence caused her to turn and look at him.
    “What?” she repeated more gently. Her eyes searched his, as she tried to read his face.
    “Coming for a drive? Gotta drop something off.”
    She nodded and watched him look away from her to start the engine. He had done that a few times recently.
    Gone to say something and then changed his mind. It was annoying and frustrating. She just wished he would tell her why he was so insistent on being in her company.
    She had worked out quite quickly, that he was well known. He supplied half of Essex with weed and ecstasy.
    He could have his pick of girls, but he pursued her; yet he never really tried to take it any further. They talked for hours about anything and everything, apart from them. He never tried to touch her, or kiss her, yet he looked at her like he had never wanted anything more.
    She had fallen for him almost instantly. Despite giving him a verbal dressing down in the middle of Brentwood High Street, she had actually been completely flattered that he had been following her, let alone that he had listed several positives to letting him take her out. Nobody had ever taken an interest in her before, especially such as keen one.
    They didn’t speak any more. Both were wrapped up in their own insecure thoughts. Sean tried to make a conscious effort to concentrate on the road ahead and Rachel pretended to read her book. It only took about five minutes to drive over to Shenfield High Street.
    Sean swung into the taxi bay that was at the small entrance of the railway station. They weren’t that far from Rachel’s flat.
    It was a busy Saturday afternoon and the taxis were in and out in a constant stream; dropping off and picking up the hundreds of commuters and shoppers. Sean got out of the car without a word and headed towards the small wooden shack that served as the cab office. Rachel watched him disappear inside. A knock on the windscreen made her jump.
    Expecting to see one of the drivers wanting her to move the car, she was surprised to see a friend standing there, grinning into the glass. Smiling, she opened the car door to get out.
    “Nathan!” Rachel exclaimed, obviously pleased to see him.“Watcha kid. Thought that was you. How you doing? It’s been a while.”
    Rachel let the older boy take her into his arms and give her a tight squeeze. She smelt the familiar scent of him. It was a smel that took her back to being young and to a time where her childhood was actual y quite settled and happy.
    Nathan was the son of one of her mother’s many boyfriends. This one however, had stuck around for a few years, both families attempting to take a shot at normality and stability.
    For a while it worked, but Nathan’s dad was a bigger alcoholic than Rachel’s mum was and after two years, her mum said enough was enough and kicked them both out. At the time, Rachel was devastated and she had