didn’t even glance my way. Instead he seemed to
be talking to himself, saying, ‘Yu Yong, Yu Yong, I know
what you are.’ I turned a deep red. He had obviously
fathomed my secret. What puzzled me about it though
was that ever since Tan Feng had returned from hospital,
I had kept the toy train hidden away in the pressure
cooker. Even my mother had failed to discover it, so how
could Tan Feng know? Had he perhaps also relied on
inspiration to guide him?
It sounds ridiculous, but after I got my hands on
that train I rarely had a chance to play with it, let alone
experience the joy of making it go. Only occasionally,
when I was sure it was completely safe, did I take the
lid off the pressure cooker and sneak a little look at it
– only a look. What are you laughing at? At a thief ‘s guilty
conscience? I did have a guilty conscience – actually it
was more painful and complicated than that – I even saw
the train a few times in my dreams, and in the dream
it was always blowing its steam whistle. Then Tan Feng
and the kids from town would come running to hear it
and I would wake up quickly from fright. I knew that
the steam whistle in my dream actually came from the
Baocheng railway two kilometres away, but still I woke up
in a cold sweat. You ask why I didn’t give the train back
to Tan Feng, but that would have made no sense. Reason
dictated I should give it back to the Chengdu girl, the real
owner. The idea had occurred to me, and one day I even
went up to the commune clinic’s door. I saw the girl in the
courtyard playing Chinese skipping, happy as anything.
She had forgotten all about the train a long time ago.
Well, I thought, if she’s forgotten about it, what’s the
point of doing a good deed and giving it back to her? And
in an epithet I had learnt from Tan Feng, I swore at her,
‘Porkhead.’
Was I very bad? Yes, when I was a child, I was pretty
bad: I went so far as to misappropriate stolen goods.
But, in fact, that’s not the right question to ask. The real
question is, with a secret like that – put yourself in my
shoes – how could I surrender the train? And then, very
soon, it was the winter holidays, and in the winter of that
year my father was released from military service and we
moved to Wuhan – our whole family moving here from
our little town in Sichuan. This news made me extremely
excited, not only because Wuhan is a big city but because
it gave me the opportunity to put all the trouble with the
train behind me. I looked forward more each day to our
move; I looked forward to leaving Tan Feng and the town
behind.
On the day we left, cold, heavy rain was falling. I was
waiting with my family at the long-distance bus station
when I saw somebody’s head appear and disappear outside
the waiting-room window, then, after a moment, it
appeared again. It was Tan Feng. I recognized him but
decided to ignore him. It was my mother who had to tell
me to go and say goodbye. ‘Tan Feng wants to say goodbye
to you. You used to be good friends, how can you
ignore him?’ And so I had to walk outside and go over to
him. His clothes were soaked from the rain and he used
his maimed hand to wipe away the water dripping from
his hair; his eyes too were wet. He seemed to want to say
something, but he didn’t open his mouth to speak. I grew
impatient and turned away. He gripped one of my hands
and I felt him slip something into it. Then he ran off, so
fast he was almost flying.
As you will all have guessed, it was the key. The key to
wind up the little red train! I remember that it was very
wet, though whether from sweat or the rain I couldn’t
say. I was very surprised; I hadn’t expected things to end
like that. Even now I feel surprised by the way it ended. I
wonder what Tan Feng meant by it?
None of the man’s friends seemed willing to answer the
question. They were silent for a moment, and then someone
asked Yu Yong, ‘Do you still have the train?’
He said, ‘No, not for a long time now. On the
be talking to himself, saying, ‘Yu Yong, Yu Yong, I know
what you are.’ I turned a deep red. He had obviously
fathomed my secret. What puzzled me about it though
was that ever since Tan Feng had returned from hospital,
I had kept the toy train hidden away in the pressure
cooker. Even my mother had failed to discover it, so how
could Tan Feng know? Had he perhaps also relied on
inspiration to guide him?
It sounds ridiculous, but after I got my hands on
that train I rarely had a chance to play with it, let alone
experience the joy of making it go. Only occasionally,
when I was sure it was completely safe, did I take the
lid off the pressure cooker and sneak a little look at it
– only a look. What are you laughing at? At a thief ‘s guilty
conscience? I did have a guilty conscience – actually it
was more painful and complicated than that – I even saw
the train a few times in my dreams, and in the dream
it was always blowing its steam whistle. Then Tan Feng
and the kids from town would come running to hear it
and I would wake up quickly from fright. I knew that
the steam whistle in my dream actually came from the
Baocheng railway two kilometres away, but still I woke up
in a cold sweat. You ask why I didn’t give the train back
to Tan Feng, but that would have made no sense. Reason
dictated I should give it back to the Chengdu girl, the real
owner. The idea had occurred to me, and one day I even
went up to the commune clinic’s door. I saw the girl in the
courtyard playing Chinese skipping, happy as anything.
She had forgotten all about the train a long time ago.
Well, I thought, if she’s forgotten about it, what’s the
point of doing a good deed and giving it back to her? And
in an epithet I had learnt from Tan Feng, I swore at her,
‘Porkhead.’
Was I very bad? Yes, when I was a child, I was pretty
bad: I went so far as to misappropriate stolen goods.
But, in fact, that’s not the right question to ask. The real
question is, with a secret like that – put yourself in my
shoes – how could I surrender the train? And then, very
soon, it was the winter holidays, and in the winter of that
year my father was released from military service and we
moved to Wuhan – our whole family moving here from
our little town in Sichuan. This news made me extremely
excited, not only because Wuhan is a big city but because
it gave me the opportunity to put all the trouble with the
train behind me. I looked forward more each day to our
move; I looked forward to leaving Tan Feng and the town
behind.
On the day we left, cold, heavy rain was falling. I was
waiting with my family at the long-distance bus station
when I saw somebody’s head appear and disappear outside
the waiting-room window, then, after a moment, it
appeared again. It was Tan Feng. I recognized him but
decided to ignore him. It was my mother who had to tell
me to go and say goodbye. ‘Tan Feng wants to say goodbye
to you. You used to be good friends, how can you
ignore him?’ And so I had to walk outside and go over to
him. His clothes were soaked from the rain and he used
his maimed hand to wipe away the water dripping from
his hair; his eyes too were wet. He seemed to want to say
something, but he didn’t open his mouth to speak. I grew
impatient and turned away. He gripped one of my hands
and I felt him slip something into it. Then he ran off, so
fast he was almost flying.
As you will all have guessed, it was the key. The key to
wind up the little red train! I remember that it was very
wet, though whether from sweat or the rain I couldn’t
say. I was very surprised; I hadn’t expected things to end
like that. Even now I feel surprised by the way it ended. I
wonder what Tan Feng meant by it?
None of the man’s friends seemed willing to answer the
question. They were silent for a moment, and then someone
asked Yu Yong, ‘Do you still have the train?’
He said, ‘No, not for a long time now. On the
Similar Books
