been helping him with his writing, you know, with her Small Press project.”
“She told me she didn’t want to date him. She was worried she felt too strongly about him.”
Lucy ordered a fresh round of shots. She said, “That night when she had her Internet date—you know, she walked away from that guy after the entrees?”
Hugo scratched his head. There was too much information about Madeleine’s secret side coming at him at once, hard to process. “But she was out until late that night.”
“She came ‘round to mine,” Lucy said. “Kind of upset, really. The whole Internet dating thing was not happening—she said she liked the guy, he was very friendly. But there was no chemistry whatsoever.”
“Okay, she said that afterwards.”
“But it wasn’t just that—she felt it was all kind of cheap, somehow. Meaningless. It was about her just going out and having sex with some random guy—even if she’d picked him from a line-up on a website. She knew it wasn’t going to thrill her in the way you wanted it to,” Lucy explained.
Somehow, Hugo completely understood. And he understood why she might decide to go after Connor instead—and he approved. He’d always wanted her to pursue her crush, the way the guy turned her on. But why had she felt the need to hide it?
“It was all just so flat,” Lucy said. “She didn’t want to be just a piece of meat her husband sent out to bang random guys before coming back for him to reclaim her. If she was going to be allowed to experience the joys of a new relationship, it had to be a relationship that made her feel that joy.”
“I get it,” Hugo said. “But why lie about it? I told her I’d love it if she dated Connor. We even pictured it sometimes when we made love.”
Lucy said, “It started out that night when she came over after that Internet date went so badly wrong. She was late back to you because we stayed up talking so long. She felt any date she had with a guy off that website was going to turn out the same way. It was obvious she had to date someone who actually meant something to her—but she knew your big fear was of this thing becoming more than just sex.”
“You knew she was going to start dating Connor? And that she was going to tell me she was still looking for guys on that website?”
Lucy held up her hands to protest her innocence. “We thought she could keep looking for someone on the website, just in case. But in the mean time, she could quietly explore the possibility of Connor—and whether dating him would start to make her feel more than just physical attraction to him.”
“But you’re saying nothing’s happened?”
“Not yet, not really. What happened on Saturday—that was the first time she really went with him for more than just a coffee, a lunch or a couple of drinks after work. And you know she kissed him.”
“I didn’t know it was Connor she kissed.”
“You’re angry?” Lucy asked him.
Hugo sat there staring at another shot glass full of clear liquid. He was feeling all light-headed, dizzy, but it was nothing to do with the alcohol blazing around his system. He also realized that things were all tingly between his thighs—and he was semi-erect.
He felt no hint of anger toward Madeleine.
“No. Not really. She wanted to see if dating Connor would actually be something that could damage us,” he reasoned. “So what did she find out?”
Lucy smiled, seeing that Hugo was quietly warming to the idea of his wife dating her crush. She said, “Well, she found out that Connor’s a lovely guy, but not interested in settling with one woman, let alone a married one.”
Hugo was silent a while, just drinking and contemplating.
Lucy said, “It’s not just sleeping with a guy that’s not her husband that forms the center of her fantasy, you see? It’s the sense that it’s forbidden, that she’s being bad in doing it. And that Internet date of hers offered her none of those feelings.”
“So she
“She told me she didn’t want to date him. She was worried she felt too strongly about him.”
Lucy ordered a fresh round of shots. She said, “That night when she had her Internet date—you know, she walked away from that guy after the entrees?”
Hugo scratched his head. There was too much information about Madeleine’s secret side coming at him at once, hard to process. “But she was out until late that night.”
“She came ‘round to mine,” Lucy said. “Kind of upset, really. The whole Internet dating thing was not happening—she said she liked the guy, he was very friendly. But there was no chemistry whatsoever.”
“Okay, she said that afterwards.”
“But it wasn’t just that—she felt it was all kind of cheap, somehow. Meaningless. It was about her just going out and having sex with some random guy—even if she’d picked him from a line-up on a website. She knew it wasn’t going to thrill her in the way you wanted it to,” Lucy explained.
Somehow, Hugo completely understood. And he understood why she might decide to go after Connor instead—and he approved. He’d always wanted her to pursue her crush, the way the guy turned her on. But why had she felt the need to hide it?
“It was all just so flat,” Lucy said. “She didn’t want to be just a piece of meat her husband sent out to bang random guys before coming back for him to reclaim her. If she was going to be allowed to experience the joys of a new relationship, it had to be a relationship that made her feel that joy.”
“I get it,” Hugo said. “But why lie about it? I told her I’d love it if she dated Connor. We even pictured it sometimes when we made love.”
Lucy said, “It started out that night when she came over after that Internet date went so badly wrong. She was late back to you because we stayed up talking so long. She felt any date she had with a guy off that website was going to turn out the same way. It was obvious she had to date someone who actually meant something to her—but she knew your big fear was of this thing becoming more than just sex.”
“You knew she was going to start dating Connor? And that she was going to tell me she was still looking for guys on that website?”
Lucy held up her hands to protest her innocence. “We thought she could keep looking for someone on the website, just in case. But in the mean time, she could quietly explore the possibility of Connor—and whether dating him would start to make her feel more than just physical attraction to him.”
“But you’re saying nothing’s happened?”
“Not yet, not really. What happened on Saturday—that was the first time she really went with him for more than just a coffee, a lunch or a couple of drinks after work. And you know she kissed him.”
“I didn’t know it was Connor she kissed.”
“You’re angry?” Lucy asked him.
Hugo sat there staring at another shot glass full of clear liquid. He was feeling all light-headed, dizzy, but it was nothing to do with the alcohol blazing around his system. He also realized that things were all tingly between his thighs—and he was semi-erect.
He felt no hint of anger toward Madeleine.
“No. Not really. She wanted to see if dating Connor would actually be something that could damage us,” he reasoned. “So what did she find out?”
Lucy smiled, seeing that Hugo was quietly warming to the idea of his wife dating her crush. She said, “Well, she found out that Connor’s a lovely guy, but not interested in settling with one woman, let alone a married one.”
Hugo was silent a while, just drinking and contemplating.
Lucy said, “It’s not just sleeping with a guy that’s not her husband that forms the center of her fantasy, you see? It’s the sense that it’s forbidden, that she’s being bad in doing it. And that Internet date of hers offered her none of those feelings.”
“So she
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