and keeping the inside as numb as possible.
“I wanted to hate you,” she said as the breeze lifted her long hair. “I wanted to feel nothing but disdain for you when Matt chose you for me, because that’s what had kept me even with Jake. I wanted the same claim I had with him. But then you became the most important part of my life instead.”
Haydan had been quiet the entire time she’d poured out her soul. It had taken hours, and now gray streaks of the coming dawn were peeking over the mountains.
“And how do you feel now?” he asked in a hoarse voice.
“Now, I feel everything. And it hurts, and I’m scared every minute, and I second guess every decision and every emotion, but maybe that’s okay. It’s better than feeling nothing at all.” She turned to him, stopping their walk along the deer path they’d found. “I could never hate you like I’d planned. You made me love you instead.”
“Say it again.”
She laughed thickly and looked him in the eyes so he could see the honesty of her words. “I love you, Haydan Walker.”
“Again.”
“I love you.”
A smile had transformed his face, and the inhuman silver color had faded from his eyes, leaving them a soft chocolate brown. The way he looked at her made her feel coveted and precious. “I’ve been waiting for you to say that.” He nodded his chin as a wicked glint sparked in his eyes. “Take your shirt off.”
Her eyes went round as she laughed. “What?”
“I’m gonna reward you with some boring-ass sex, princess. Now take that shirt off so I can admire those scars you earned.”
A soft squeal left her lips as she pulled her sweater over her hair. Oh, she knew it looked rough. Zebra stripe scars all over her body. Brighton’s, at least, were evenly marked and looked like body art down his one side, but her tissue samples had been done over six years, and now there wasn’t an un-marred strip of flesh left on her torso.
A soft rumble emanated from Haydan’s chest as he dropped to his knees in front of her. Even like this, his head was still to her chest. His hands slid around her waist as he studied her pale skin, crisscrossed with silver, aged scars. He didn’t look at her with pity or disdain, so she didn’t spare a blush for her mate who saw for the first time the history that had been etched into her skin.
“No one in the world looks like you,” he said on a breath. Leaning forward, he brushed his lips against a long stripe that covered her middle. “You’re beautiful.”
She inhaled deeply and raked her fingertips through his short, thick hair. “So are you.”
He reached around and unfastened her bra with a quiet snap. And now her nerves were kicking in, because she’d never actually invited someone to enjoy her intimate parts. She’d only wanted to be ravaged in the dark and then left alone. But Haydan was different, and feeling vulnerable in front of him felt right. He wouldn’t hurt her. He loved her.
She shrugged out of her bra and tossed it to the ground by her shirt. Without missing a beat, Haydan pulled one of her nipples into his mouth and sucked until her bud had tightened. Warmth flooded her middle, pooling between her legs as he moved to the other. Tongue laving, he adored her slowly, savoring her and taking his time to get to know her body.
Desperate to touch his skin, she pulled his sweater over his head and traced the curving shapes of his tattoo with her fingers as he trailed kisses over her scars.
Hot AF Haydan, but he was so much more than that.
A long, shaky breath left her as he pulled her boots off, then her jeans, then her panties, but never rushing, never taking his eyes off her skin.
The breeze was cold, and he ran his hands over the gooseflesh that appeared on her arms. Without a word, he wrapped his oversize sweater around her shoulders and pulled her down. Hooking her knees on each side of his hips, she kissed him. Feeling bold, she brushed her tongue past his lips and tasted him.
“I wanted to hate you,” she said as the breeze lifted her long hair. “I wanted to feel nothing but disdain for you when Matt chose you for me, because that’s what had kept me even with Jake. I wanted the same claim I had with him. But then you became the most important part of my life instead.”
Haydan had been quiet the entire time she’d poured out her soul. It had taken hours, and now gray streaks of the coming dawn were peeking over the mountains.
“And how do you feel now?” he asked in a hoarse voice.
“Now, I feel everything. And it hurts, and I’m scared every minute, and I second guess every decision and every emotion, but maybe that’s okay. It’s better than feeling nothing at all.” She turned to him, stopping their walk along the deer path they’d found. “I could never hate you like I’d planned. You made me love you instead.”
“Say it again.”
She laughed thickly and looked him in the eyes so he could see the honesty of her words. “I love you, Haydan Walker.”
“Again.”
“I love you.”
A smile had transformed his face, and the inhuman silver color had faded from his eyes, leaving them a soft chocolate brown. The way he looked at her made her feel coveted and precious. “I’ve been waiting for you to say that.” He nodded his chin as a wicked glint sparked in his eyes. “Take your shirt off.”
Her eyes went round as she laughed. “What?”
“I’m gonna reward you with some boring-ass sex, princess. Now take that shirt off so I can admire those scars you earned.”
A soft squeal left her lips as she pulled her sweater over her hair. Oh, she knew it looked rough. Zebra stripe scars all over her body. Brighton’s, at least, were evenly marked and looked like body art down his one side, but her tissue samples had been done over six years, and now there wasn’t an un-marred strip of flesh left on her torso.
A soft rumble emanated from Haydan’s chest as he dropped to his knees in front of her. Even like this, his head was still to her chest. His hands slid around her waist as he studied her pale skin, crisscrossed with silver, aged scars. He didn’t look at her with pity or disdain, so she didn’t spare a blush for her mate who saw for the first time the history that had been etched into her skin.
“No one in the world looks like you,” he said on a breath. Leaning forward, he brushed his lips against a long stripe that covered her middle. “You’re beautiful.”
She inhaled deeply and raked her fingertips through his short, thick hair. “So are you.”
He reached around and unfastened her bra with a quiet snap. And now her nerves were kicking in, because she’d never actually invited someone to enjoy her intimate parts. She’d only wanted to be ravaged in the dark and then left alone. But Haydan was different, and feeling vulnerable in front of him felt right. He wouldn’t hurt her. He loved her.
She shrugged out of her bra and tossed it to the ground by her shirt. Without missing a beat, Haydan pulled one of her nipples into his mouth and sucked until her bud had tightened. Warmth flooded her middle, pooling between her legs as he moved to the other. Tongue laving, he adored her slowly, savoring her and taking his time to get to know her body.
Desperate to touch his skin, she pulled his sweater over his head and traced the curving shapes of his tattoo with her fingers as he trailed kisses over her scars.
Hot AF Haydan, but he was so much more than that.
A long, shaky breath left her as he pulled her boots off, then her jeans, then her panties, but never rushing, never taking his eyes off her skin.
The breeze was cold, and he ran his hands over the gooseflesh that appeared on her arms. Without a word, he wrapped his oversize sweater around her shoulders and pulled her down. Hooking her knees on each side of his hips, she kissed him. Feeling bold, she brushed her tongue past his lips and tasted him.
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