Loving Care by Gail Gaymer Martin

particularly sweet since he’d arrived at her house, but she hadn’t found the right time to talk about the topic that burned within her.
    “Are you chilled?” Milton asked.
    “No. Not at all.”
    “I thought I felt you shiver,” he said, nestling her closer.
    She struggled with the desire to pull away. “Would you mind if we leave?” The spoken words startled her.
    “Leave?” His concern deepened to a frown. “No, if you’re not feeling well.”
    He stood, and she followed, not wanting to explain her reasons. They hurried down the dark aisle between the benches. The stage lights faded, and the moon spread onto the shadowy path to the car.
    Milton unlocked the door, holding it open for Christie to slide in, then he rounded to the driver’s side. When he closed the door, he sat a moment before speaking.
    “Something’s wrong.” He shifted to see her, his face furrowing with concern.
    Wrong wasn’t the word. Something was finally right as far as Christie was concerned. In truth, the answer had come to her over a month ago. How could she commit to one man when another’s image brightened her dreams each night and tugged at her heart all day? She could no longer avoid the obvious. Patrick’s return had toppled her world upside down.
    A yes to Milton would be Christie’s spiteful attempt to punish Patrick for remarrying and having the child she’d never had. But she’d stayed close enough to the Lord to know that vindictiveness was not motivation for a marriage. Hurting a kind, caring man like Milton was not her intent and was not what the Lord would have her do. She’d dragged out their relationship far too long.
    “Christie, what is it?” He lifted his palm to her cheek and turned her face toward him.
    “I’m sorry, Milton. I’ve made a decision. A decision about us.”
    He let his hand drop to his lap as if he knew the answer. “I’m willing to wait if that’s what you need. I haven’t rushed you.”
    “Time won’t change anything, Milton. You’re a wonderful man. A catch for the right woman. I’m just not her.”
    “It’s Patrick, isn’t it?”
    His question startled her, and a rush of heat rose from deep within her stomach and rolled down her limbs. “No. No, it’s…” She couldn’t help but tell the truth. “It’s not Patrick in the way you’re suggesting, Milton, but yes, he motivated my thinking.”
    “What kind of rubbish is that?”
    “It’s not rubbish. I don’t love you, Milton. Not the kind of love that makes a marriage. I admire you. I enjoy your company, and I’m grateful for your friendship. But I fell in love once. Yes, with Patrick. I realize that’s over, but the memory of that kind of love tells me that I can never marry you if I’m honest with myself.”
    He fell against the seat back. “Then, I don’t suppose you want this?” He dug into his pocket and withdrew a dark velvet box.
    In the dusky light, Christie couldn’t see the color—deep blue or red. Maybe black, but she didn’t have to open it. She didn’t want to open it. Her heart ached at the sadness she’d caused Milton. Lord, why was I not honest sooner? With him and myself? She felt hot tears roll down her cheeks anddrip onto Milton’s hands as he held the box in front of her. “Please forgive me.”
    He felt the wetness because he withdrew the ring box and wiped his hand against his sleeve. “I had hoped…in time.” He clutched the box as if waiting for her to change her mind.
    “You deserve someone who can love you fully. I’d be cheating you and myself if I said yes.”
    “I know you can’t have children. I can accept that, Christie. And who knows? Maybe—”
    “That’s not the problem. It’s me. It’s how I feel inside.” She pressed her palm against her chest. “I have to listen to my heart, Milton.”
    He lowered his head and slid the box back into his pocket. He adjusted the pocket flap as if in slow motion.
    “Can I see you?”
    She shook her head, startled that