LOVED by Scott Hildreth

table and wiped them off with a napkin. I placed them into the envelope and got a pen from my purse and marked it.
    House warming gifts from Espresso A Go Go, 2013.
    I folded the envelope and placed it in my purse with the pen. I looked up at Erik and smiled as I placed my purse back in the window ledge.
    “ Our house warming gifts,” I said.
    “For our house,” Erik responded.
    “Ours. And our special coffee shop,” I said.
    “Ours,” he responded.
    I love hearing him say that.
    Ours.
     
     
     
    KELLI. “Why?” he asked me.
    “Because I feel…I don’t know. It’s hard to explain,” I said.
    “Do your best,” he said.
    I thought about what he asked me. It wasn’t easy to explain. It wasn’t easy for me to even understand. It was just easy to do , especially with Erik. I liked that he made all of the decisions, for the most part. I enjoyed the thought of him owning me, and of this relationship slowly developing onto the one that it would one day become.
    “I think it’s just because for the first time in my life I haven’t had to think. I think that may be one of them. Probably a big one,” I said.
    “I’m sure that’s part of it,” he said as he crossed his legs.
    I sat and looked at the floor. I stared at the carpet until my vision blurred. I couldn’t find words to describe it. It just was.
    I looked up and shrugged my shoulders.
    “Who owns you?” he asked from the couch he was sitting on.
    “You sir,” I responded.
    “You’re a good girl for me, aren’t you baby girl?” he asked.
    I nodded repeatedly, “Yes sir, I am.”
    “You ever going to disappoint me, baby girl?” he asked.
    I shook my head from side to side. I hated when he even asked me this. I would never disappoint Erik. The thought of it made me sick to my stomach.
    “No, never,” I responded.
    “Because you’re my baby girl, and you’re going to do what I ask of you,” he said as he nodded his head slowly.
    I nodded.
    “Yes sir,” I said.
    “Can I come over there now,” I asked, pointing to the couch.
    He shook his head side to side.
    “No,” he responded.
    I wanted to go sit beside him. He told me I had to sit in the chair and we were going to talk. I didn’t like this. I wanted to be beside him. Touching him. Smelling him. Having him touch me. I have been good, and I have not done anything stupid in a long, long time. He should let me sit by him.
    “I want to…”
    “Kelli,” he said sternly.
    I looked down at the floor.
    “How does it make you feel when I put my hand on the back of your neck and grip it with my hand, baby girl? While we’re talking or standing in the kitchen?” he asked.
    I nodded, “I love it.”
    “How does it make you feel ?” he asked.
    I thought for a second before I answered.
    “Comfortable. Sleepy. Relaxed.”
    He nodded slowly, his hand still on his chin.
    “When I tell you I am proud of you?” he asked.
    “Happy. Like I’m doing a good job of being a good girl for you. Kind of like I have accomplished something,” I said.
    “When I tell you you’re a good girl?” he asked.
    “It’s kind of the same - but just not as much. Like being a good girl and you being proud are kind of the same. You being proud, it’s just better. It kind of means more,” I said.
    H e nodded again and rubbed his face with his hand.
    “When I squeeze your neck while we’re fucking, how about that?” he asked.
    I closed my eyes.
    I love it when he does that.
    “I love it. I love it . On the roof, I loved it so much. I think I passed out. It was. Well, I don’t know how to explain it, but I love it,” I said as I opened my eyes.
    “Well, you didn’t pass out, but I understand. It’s euphoric, Kelli. It certainly isn’t for everyone, but it can be very euphoric.”
    “Put it on the list of what I really, really like,” I said.
    “When I slap your little ass?”
    “Love it,” I said.
    “Restrain you?” he asked.
    I thought about what he asked.
    “Tie me up?” I