behavior.
Can result in having “no hope of connecting again in the future” 7
Can end in “suicide or angry, violent alienation” 8
“When my heart was grieved and my spirit embittered, I was senseless and ignorant; I was a brute beast before you.” (Psalm 73:21–22)
Active Yet Lonely
Q UESTION: “My life is active and full, so why do I get lonely?”
A NSWER: Activity alone is not a cure for loneliness. Over-involvement in activities—to the point where you have no solitude—can be an attempt to numb the longing in your heart for God.
“Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from him. He alone is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will not be shaken.” (Psalm 62:5–6)
WHAT DOES It Mean to Be Alone?
Are you comfortable spending time alone, solitary, and separate from others? Or, do you prefer to spend your waking hours surrounded by people, noise, and activity because you associate quiet, private time with loneliness and emptiness?
Actually, spending time alone—seeking the peace and quiet of solitude—can bring serenity to your spirit.
Solitary time spent in prayer or Bible study can also broaden your perspective and deepen your faith. Psalm 46:10 encourages you to: “Be still, and know that I am God.” By seeking times of solitude, you put aside your worldly concerns and simply listen for God’s voice. Doing so helps you discern His intended path so that you can choose it as your own.
“Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I lift up my soul.” (Psalm 143:8)
Being alone means being solitary, “separated from others.” 9
Alone in the New Testament is sometimes translated from the Greek word monos, which means “alone, by oneself.” 10
Jesus often sought solitude. He separated Himself from others in order to commune alone with the Father.
“After he had dismissed them, he went up on a mountainside by himself to pray. When evening came, he was there alone.” (Matthew 14:23)
Being alone can be positive or negative.
Alone in the Old Testament is sometimes translated from the Hebrew word băd , which means “alone, by one’s self, apart.” 11
Moses was settling disputes all alone from morning to evening, wearing himself out. He needed the help of others.
“You and these people who come to you will only wear yourselves out. The work is too heavy for you; you cannot handle it alone.” (Exodus 18:18)
Wanting Time Alone
Q UESTION: “At times I feel like I must get away by myself, but my mate worries that this is a negative reflection on us. I love and enjoy our relationship. Is there something wrong with me in wanting time alone?”
A NSWER: No, solitude is time spent physically apart from all others, which can be good for you. Warren Wiersbe observed, “Jesus used to go out by Himself to meditate and to pray. ... The apostle Paul left his friends so he could walk and meditate while they traveled by ship. He wanted solitude. He wanted to be alone.” 12
Solitude is “the quality or state of being alone or remote from society.” 13 Most people believe that being alone is the same thing as being lonely. However, they are usually basing their thinking on their own painful experience.
Healthy solitude is ... 14
A state of being “alone, but not necessarily lonely” 15
A chosen separation from the press of people
A needed refuge from the noise and negativity of life
A place of privacy “to sort out ideas, values, and attitudes” 16
A healthy haven from unhealthy emotions
A positive time alone without being preoccupied with missing others
A shelter from the storm to handle significant loss
A personal retreat to prime the pump of creativity
A private sanctuary to rest, pray, and meditate
“At daybreak Jesus went out to a solitary place. ... One of those days Jesus went out to a mountainside to pray, and spent the night praying to God.” (Luke 4:42; 6:12)
HOW DOES Being Alone
N.R. Walker
Laura Farrell
Andrea Kane
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Muriel Rukeyser
Jeff Stone
Boris Pasternak
Bobby Teale
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