sick.”
Fucking hell. “Yes, how bad is he sick? Ah… es muy malo ?”
“ Sí, está muy enfermo. Sus pulmones están en mal estado. Que está conectado a un respirador, pero creo que sólo debería durar una semana más o menos ,” she said in rapid-fire Spanish.
“Oh God…” I wasn’t sure what all the words were, but I definitely picked out that his lungs were very bad, and he wasn’t expected to live for longer than a week, more or less.
“What is it, Lily?” Aidan asked softly, and I looked up at him, my eyes filling with tears. I couldn’t say the words.
“Thanks. I have to go now.” I hung up, setting the phone on the desk. Without another word, I went back out onto the terrace, looking down at the peaceful garden below. Aidan didn’t follow me out, and I was glad for the opportunity to pull my thoughts together.
Sure, I’d known my dad was in rough shape for a while, but hearing it spelled out like that, the idea that I might never see him again… it sent me to a dark place I didn’t know how to climb out of.
It got colder outside, but I didn’t care. I felt numb, inside and out.
“Come inside,” Aidan called out from the doorway, but I wasn’t ready to. Going inside meant talking about it, and talking about it meant it would be real.
“Five more minutes,” I said, without looking back over my shoulder.
“You’ll freeze.”
“Five more minutes won’t make a difference one way or the other.”
He let it go, and I breathed an inner sigh of relief, but he returned to wrap a warm blanket around my shoulders. “Five more minutes,” he warned, kissing the side of my head. “And then I’m tossing you over my shoulder and carrying you in myself.” Like a caveman? The thought brought a faint smile to my lips, but I didn’t answer beyond a faint nod.
I didn’t actually have a watch on, but after a while, he came and touched my shoulders, and I went in without an argument. Aidan led me right to the fireplace, rubbing his big hands over my arms, trying to work some warmth into my bones. He didn’t speak, letting me gradually thaw, both inside and out.
“My dad’s dying,” I said eventually, staring at the flickering flames.
“What did the nurse say?”
I gave a half shrug, pulling the blanket tighter around me. “I don’t know exactly, she didn’t speak much English. But she said something about his lungs, and him not having more than a week to live.”
“She didn’t speak English? What the hell kind of nurse am I paying for?” he scowled, pulling out his phone.
“Thank you for doing that, by the way,” I said with a faint smile. “You didn’t have to.”
I saw his shrug out of the corner of my eye. “Fat lot of good it did if she can’t communicate with you.”
“No, I got the impression she’s the off-time nurse. The regular nurse wasn’t there.”
“Ah.” His fingers stilled on the phone. “I could have a specialist sent to see him. They do make house calls if you ask the right way.”
He meant with money. “That’s really sweet and all, but if it’s as bad as she said, I’m guessing nothing can be done.”
Aidan didn’t argue that, and the reality of my words dragged me back down again. My father was dying. And no amount of money Aidan threw at him would change that fact, even though I did appreciate the sentiment – especially given their history together. The fact that he’d hired a nurse at all still blew me away.
“You should go and be with him,” he said in a low voice.
“Are you serious?” I looked up in surprise, forgetting the rule, and he turned away. I’m not sure if he even realized he was doing it, the motion was so ingrained into him.
“That’s what you want, isn’t it? To be with him in his final days.”
My eyes flew wide with surprise. “Of course, yes, I’d love that. I just didn’t think…” I launched myself
Fucking hell. “Yes, how bad is he sick? Ah… es muy malo ?”
“ Sí, está muy enfermo. Sus pulmones están en mal estado. Que está conectado a un respirador, pero creo que sólo debería durar una semana más o menos ,” she said in rapid-fire Spanish.
“Oh God…” I wasn’t sure what all the words were, but I definitely picked out that his lungs were very bad, and he wasn’t expected to live for longer than a week, more or less.
“What is it, Lily?” Aidan asked softly, and I looked up at him, my eyes filling with tears. I couldn’t say the words.
“Thanks. I have to go now.” I hung up, setting the phone on the desk. Without another word, I went back out onto the terrace, looking down at the peaceful garden below. Aidan didn’t follow me out, and I was glad for the opportunity to pull my thoughts together.
Sure, I’d known my dad was in rough shape for a while, but hearing it spelled out like that, the idea that I might never see him again… it sent me to a dark place I didn’t know how to climb out of.
It got colder outside, but I didn’t care. I felt numb, inside and out.
“Come inside,” Aidan called out from the doorway, but I wasn’t ready to. Going inside meant talking about it, and talking about it meant it would be real.
“Five more minutes,” I said, without looking back over my shoulder.
“You’ll freeze.”
“Five more minutes won’t make a difference one way or the other.”
He let it go, and I breathed an inner sigh of relief, but he returned to wrap a warm blanket around my shoulders. “Five more minutes,” he warned, kissing the side of my head. “And then I’m tossing you over my shoulder and carrying you in myself.” Like a caveman? The thought brought a faint smile to my lips, but I didn’t answer beyond a faint nod.
I didn’t actually have a watch on, but after a while, he came and touched my shoulders, and I went in without an argument. Aidan led me right to the fireplace, rubbing his big hands over my arms, trying to work some warmth into my bones. He didn’t speak, letting me gradually thaw, both inside and out.
“My dad’s dying,” I said eventually, staring at the flickering flames.
“What did the nurse say?”
I gave a half shrug, pulling the blanket tighter around me. “I don’t know exactly, she didn’t speak much English. But she said something about his lungs, and him not having more than a week to live.”
“She didn’t speak English? What the hell kind of nurse am I paying for?” he scowled, pulling out his phone.
“Thank you for doing that, by the way,” I said with a faint smile. “You didn’t have to.”
I saw his shrug out of the corner of my eye. “Fat lot of good it did if she can’t communicate with you.”
“No, I got the impression she’s the off-time nurse. The regular nurse wasn’t there.”
“Ah.” His fingers stilled on the phone. “I could have a specialist sent to see him. They do make house calls if you ask the right way.”
He meant with money. “That’s really sweet and all, but if it’s as bad as she said, I’m guessing nothing can be done.”
Aidan didn’t argue that, and the reality of my words dragged me back down again. My father was dying. And no amount of money Aidan threw at him would change that fact, even though I did appreciate the sentiment – especially given their history together. The fact that he’d hired a nurse at all still blew me away.
“You should go and be with him,” he said in a low voice.
“Are you serious?” I looked up in surprise, forgetting the rule, and he turned away. I’m not sure if he even realized he was doing it, the motion was so ingrained into him.
“That’s what you want, isn’t it? To be with him in his final days.”
My eyes flew wide with surprise. “Of course, yes, I’d love that. I just didn’t think…” I launched myself
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