trying to hurt you. I’m honored you wanted me to have it. I’m glad you took the contract. Gift or not, you deserved payment. And now Alfred wants to commission a piece. You should be happy.”
“Yes, everyone is happy.” She started to move away.
“I’d be terrified if I thought I couldn’t write, so I think I have some idea how hard this is for you.”
She faced him fully. “With all due respect, no, you don’t. I came here to sort out my life, and I stayed to help a complete stranger get hers back. I was given a chance to teach some kids about art and, in the process, I’m beginning to relearn a bit about my own. I met your grandfather, walked through his amazing garden, and for the firsttime since the courtroom battle, I wanted to work. I wanted to feel the clay under my hands.” She paused, then said, “I’ve never taken my talent for granted. I thanked God every time I came up with a new creation. But to just lose it, to lose your faith in yourself … There is this sense of being abandoned. By your own self. It’s the cruelest trick. Unless you’ve been through the hell of losing your gift, you can’t possibly know what it means to me to think I might get it back.”
Cai listened to her passionate defense and thought about the blank monitor screen he’d been staring at for a week.
“Oh, yes, I do,” he said quietly.
“Then you know it’s twice as terrifying wondering if it’s back to stay.”
He reached out to touch her, but she immediately stepped back. That hurt, but he didn’t blame her. He’d gotten his distraction, but he hadn’t intended this. Which was exactly why he should just stay on his damn island and not get involved with people.
She was at the door when he spoke. “I’ll pick you up to see Alfred whenever you want. Just call.”
She turned. She looked tired. Very tired. “I get done with the kids early on Wednesday, by noon at the latest. Any time after that would be fine.” She paused a second, then added, “Thank you, Cai. I appreciate it.” Then she walked away.
He sat back down and stared out the window. The parking lot was unlit, so he couldn’t see her climb in her car and leave, but he saw her just the same. He saw how she looked at him when he made her smile. He saw the smile shift to a frown when she was upset. He saw the vulnerability she hid behind bravado. He saw the concern and warmth that filled her eyes when she talked of Alfred. He saw those same eyes go dark with desire when he pulled herinto his arms. He saw her spit fire at him when he set her off.
He saw her all right. With every breath he took, he saw her. He balled up his napkin and shot it hard into the trash, then stalked out into the night.
F OURTEEN
J ordy made herself comfortable on the stone bench and flipped open her sketch book. She smiled when she spied the dirt under her fingernails. Alfred had been right, it was better to sink bare hands into the soil. There was life there. Just as there was in clay.
She’d left Alfred behind in his hothouses and headed to the gardens. She chose a fountain pen with a fine nib, checked the ink cartridge, then focused on the small figures she’d chosen to draw. She’d decided to begin by sketching whatever caught her attention. Her pen moved swiftly and the small pond lily fairies came instantly to life on the paper.
She had no idea how long she’d been at it when Dilys suddenly appeared.
“Sorry to startle you,” Dilys said perfunctorily.
“No, no problem.” She noticed the older woman carried a silver platter laid for tea.
“I thought you might like to break for some tea.”
Jordy set aside the pad and pen and stood, reaching for the tray. “Thank you. You didn’t need to go to all this trouble, though.”
Dilys regarded her silently. The look on her face made itclear that she felt it would be an act akin to blasphemy to skip tea.
“I’ll bring this back to the house when I’m done,” Jordy said.
“No need. I’ll be
“Yes, everyone is happy.” She started to move away.
“I’d be terrified if I thought I couldn’t write, so I think I have some idea how hard this is for you.”
She faced him fully. “With all due respect, no, you don’t. I came here to sort out my life, and I stayed to help a complete stranger get hers back. I was given a chance to teach some kids about art and, in the process, I’m beginning to relearn a bit about my own. I met your grandfather, walked through his amazing garden, and for the firsttime since the courtroom battle, I wanted to work. I wanted to feel the clay under my hands.” She paused, then said, “I’ve never taken my talent for granted. I thanked God every time I came up with a new creation. But to just lose it, to lose your faith in yourself … There is this sense of being abandoned. By your own self. It’s the cruelest trick. Unless you’ve been through the hell of losing your gift, you can’t possibly know what it means to me to think I might get it back.”
Cai listened to her passionate defense and thought about the blank monitor screen he’d been staring at for a week.
“Oh, yes, I do,” he said quietly.
“Then you know it’s twice as terrifying wondering if it’s back to stay.”
He reached out to touch her, but she immediately stepped back. That hurt, but he didn’t blame her. He’d gotten his distraction, but he hadn’t intended this. Which was exactly why he should just stay on his damn island and not get involved with people.
She was at the door when he spoke. “I’ll pick you up to see Alfred whenever you want. Just call.”
She turned. She looked tired. Very tired. “I get done with the kids early on Wednesday, by noon at the latest. Any time after that would be fine.” She paused a second, then added, “Thank you, Cai. I appreciate it.” Then she walked away.
He sat back down and stared out the window. The parking lot was unlit, so he couldn’t see her climb in her car and leave, but he saw her just the same. He saw how she looked at him when he made her smile. He saw the smile shift to a frown when she was upset. He saw the vulnerability she hid behind bravado. He saw the concern and warmth that filled her eyes when she talked of Alfred. He saw those same eyes go dark with desire when he pulled herinto his arms. He saw her spit fire at him when he set her off.
He saw her all right. With every breath he took, he saw her. He balled up his napkin and shot it hard into the trash, then stalked out into the night.
F OURTEEN
J ordy made herself comfortable on the stone bench and flipped open her sketch book. She smiled when she spied the dirt under her fingernails. Alfred had been right, it was better to sink bare hands into the soil. There was life there. Just as there was in clay.
She’d left Alfred behind in his hothouses and headed to the gardens. She chose a fountain pen with a fine nib, checked the ink cartridge, then focused on the small figures she’d chosen to draw. She’d decided to begin by sketching whatever caught her attention. Her pen moved swiftly and the small pond lily fairies came instantly to life on the paper.
She had no idea how long she’d been at it when Dilys suddenly appeared.
“Sorry to startle you,” Dilys said perfunctorily.
“No, no problem.” She noticed the older woman carried a silver platter laid for tea.
“I thought you might like to break for some tea.”
Jordy set aside the pad and pen and stood, reaching for the tray. “Thank you. You didn’t need to go to all this trouble, though.”
Dilys regarded her silently. The look on her face made itclear that she felt it would be an act akin to blasphemy to skip tea.
“I’ll bring this back to the house when I’m done,” Jordy said.
“No need. I’ll be
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