Lady Grace & the War for a New World (Earth's End Book 2) by Sandy Nathan

Mark Tambourg was the most respected psychiatrist in the country. He covered for you with the military, the FBI, and with Special Forces. He put his life in jeopardy for you.”
    “Why?”
    “Because he was a good man. And because he knew you could save our world if you were given enough time and the materials to do it. He was a revolutionary, Jeremy. I became active in the resistance because of him. You knew revolution was coming.”
    “Yeah. And I knew you were working with us. But …”
    “You were still lonely. And afraid.”
    “You left me, Mom. You stuck me in my ‘basement pad’ at the school and took off with … Well, who was the first after daddy died? Do you even remember?” Jeremy rubbed his eyes with the back of his hand. “Fuck!”
    Her stomach lurched. This was it: what really held them apart. “I don’t remember who it was.”
    “Dicks! Just dicks, weren’t they?” He glared at her, hands forming fists. “You left me for a bunch of dicks!”
    “Yes, that’s all they were, for years. Dicks that I used and dicks that used me. But it wasn’t quite so simple.” Her eyes locked on his. She had to make him understand. “Jeremy, did you ever wonder how I knew Mark Tambourg?”
    “You knew everyone.”
    “I knew many people, but people in society, and politicians and industrialists. I stayed away from intellectuals. They ended up in camps. But I knew Mark. Why?”
    Jeremy shook his head.
    “Why would anyone know a psychiatrist?”
    “You were seeing a shrink ?” He looked incredulous.
    “Yes. I suffered terribly in my years of entertaining dicks. I felt like something was devouring me inside. I couldn’t stop what I was doing. So I went to a psychiatrist.”
    Jeremy’s eyes widened and he turned away.
    “I don’t want to talk about this, either, but I think we need to. And I think clearing it up is the only way we’ll be a real family.”
    He turned back to her, looking guarded.
    “The way I acted was a disease. But Mark said he could cure me.”
    “Really?”
    “Yes. I met with him four days a week when I was in New York and talked to him on the phone when I was traveling. I did it for more than two years.”
    “Did it work?”
    “Not at all. Same anguish, same desire.” She made a bitter little snort.
    “Why didn’t it work?”
    “Mark told me that whatever made me act the way I did was so buried that I hadn’t gotten desperate enough or shook up enough to make it surface. Whatever it was didn’t matter—once the general fell for me, I was his prisoner. What a fool I was, Jeremy, to think that I could tame a monster. Or get away from him.
    “That’s when I really abandoned you, darling. Not only was I the general’s prisoner, I stayed away so that he didn’t find out how smart you are. You would have ended up in a bunker in Siberia, designing things for him.
    “I was a rotten mother and a terrible person. I didn’t want to be bad, Jeremy. I tried as hard as I could to stop.” She felt a million years old, her face drawn. Jeremy stared at her. She couldn’t read his expression.
    “I’m not like that anymore, I swear to you.” She knew he would never forgive her. Trying to work things out with Jeremy was as useless as going to that shrink.
    Veronica pulled herself out of bed and into a crouching position, as though she were going to run down the corridor and leap out the container’s door. But she couldn’t move, Sam was in the way. She looked around wildly. When she saw no way out, Veronica fell on her side, sobbing. The brave front she’d kept up crumpled.
    Her hands covered her face and tiny cries escaped her. She felt Jeremy put his arms around her, trying to make her calm down, but the black despair she’d known with the general consumed her. Hope didn’t exist; her life was ruined and she couldn’t fix it. Veronica felt herself spiral downward, scarcely registering Jeremy’s pleas. Her body stiffened and her hands became claws. She wasn’t aware of