could barely believe it, though I felt a huge sense of relief that Xavier wasn’t the father of her baby. Then again I should have known Xavier would never do that to his own child. I knew that in my heart.
“Leave me alone, Tarquin.” Violeta looked at him distastefully. “I want nothing to do with you.”
“But I love you,” Tarquin pleaded.
“I want a king, Tarquin.” She looked at him condescendingly. “I want a man that will one day be king. I want a man to possess me. I want a man that can fuck me and make me come within seconds. Yo u — you are not any of those things. Leave me alone and scat.” She looked at him coldly as she walked to the door as regally as she could. I was still in shock as she walked and I couldn’t imagine how she was feeling.
“Leave, whore,” Casper said and looked at Charles, who was looking like he’d just seen a ghost.
“Uhm, let us continue,” Charles said and changed the subject as Violeta walked out the door. I was surprised that no one went after her. Not even Tarquin. What had just happened? I felt even more dazed and confused and then my heart lurched as my moment came. “Lola, you’re next. Who do you choose as the man that gave you the most pleasure?” He looked at me curiously and I felt all the blood draining from my face. On my right stood Xavier, my love, the man I had come with and on the left, stood Stephan, eager, charismatic, handsome Stephan and he’d made it clear that he was here for me. He wanted me. He wanted to please me. He wanted to make me his. I stood there with my heart in my mouth. I didn’t know who I was going to pick. I didn’t know what to do. One wrong choice and my whole life would change. One wrong choice and Xavier would hate me. One wrong choice and I could be taken into a life of sexual pleasure that was far out of my realm. And the problem wasn’t in the fact that I didn’t know who I was going to choose. The problem was in the fact that I was going to lie. I was going to go with man number one and the feather because I was sure that had been Xavier. I was going to go with him because he was who I wanted. But if I was truly honest with myself, the man that had pleased me more was man number 2. The man who had taken me to new sexual heights was Stephan. And that made me feel guiltier than anything. I wanted to cry as I stood there, unable to speak.
“Lola,” Charles said again as all eyes gazed at me. “You have to tell us now. Whom do you choose?”
Chapter Fifteen
Xavier
I could feel Stephan’s eyes on Lola as we all waited for her answer. I could see the way he was staring at her so intently, like a fox watching his prey before he got ready to pounce. He wanted her. I could see it in the way that he watched her. He wanted her and it was about more than just getting back at me. She’d touched a part of him, intrigued him as she’d intrigued me. I’d been surprised when I’d seen him with the feather, touching her lightly and delicately. I’d been sure he’d do something more, try something harder, more intimate. Like he had with Violeta. I wasn’t sure why he’d used a dildo on her and then a feather on Lola, but it had calmed me down. Stopped me from going in the room and punching his teeth out. I’d been happy that he’d used the feather, until I’d seen Lola’s reaction to it. It had turned her on and she’d been moaning and sliding on the bed. And I’d been crazy with jealousy and madness. And when she’d come, I’d wanted to die. I’d wanted to cut myself into tiny pieces and throw them into the ocean because it was in that moment that I’d know I was scum. The fact that I’d brought her here, the fact that I’d thought this was okay, it showed me that I was no better than the other men here. I loved Lola and I’d betrayed her and myself by trying to get into the inner circle. I knew now that it wasn’t important. But it was too late. It was too late to change any of it. I was angry with
“Leave me alone, Tarquin.” Violeta looked at him distastefully. “I want nothing to do with you.”
“But I love you,” Tarquin pleaded.
“I want a king, Tarquin.” She looked at him condescendingly. “I want a man that will one day be king. I want a man to possess me. I want a man that can fuck me and make me come within seconds. Yo u — you are not any of those things. Leave me alone and scat.” She looked at him coldly as she walked to the door as regally as she could. I was still in shock as she walked and I couldn’t imagine how she was feeling.
“Leave, whore,” Casper said and looked at Charles, who was looking like he’d just seen a ghost.
“Uhm, let us continue,” Charles said and changed the subject as Violeta walked out the door. I was surprised that no one went after her. Not even Tarquin. What had just happened? I felt even more dazed and confused and then my heart lurched as my moment came. “Lola, you’re next. Who do you choose as the man that gave you the most pleasure?” He looked at me curiously and I felt all the blood draining from my face. On my right stood Xavier, my love, the man I had come with and on the left, stood Stephan, eager, charismatic, handsome Stephan and he’d made it clear that he was here for me. He wanted me. He wanted to please me. He wanted to make me his. I stood there with my heart in my mouth. I didn’t know who I was going to pick. I didn’t know what to do. One wrong choice and my whole life would change. One wrong choice and Xavier would hate me. One wrong choice and I could be taken into a life of sexual pleasure that was far out of my realm. And the problem wasn’t in the fact that I didn’t know who I was going to choose. The problem was in the fact that I was going to lie. I was going to go with man number one and the feather because I was sure that had been Xavier. I was going to go with him because he was who I wanted. But if I was truly honest with myself, the man that had pleased me more was man number 2. The man who had taken me to new sexual heights was Stephan. And that made me feel guiltier than anything. I wanted to cry as I stood there, unable to speak.
“Lola,” Charles said again as all eyes gazed at me. “You have to tell us now. Whom do you choose?”
Chapter Fifteen
Xavier
I could feel Stephan’s eyes on Lola as we all waited for her answer. I could see the way he was staring at her so intently, like a fox watching his prey before he got ready to pounce. He wanted her. I could see it in the way that he watched her. He wanted her and it was about more than just getting back at me. She’d touched a part of him, intrigued him as she’d intrigued me. I’d been surprised when I’d seen him with the feather, touching her lightly and delicately. I’d been sure he’d do something more, try something harder, more intimate. Like he had with Violeta. I wasn’t sure why he’d used a dildo on her and then a feather on Lola, but it had calmed me down. Stopped me from going in the room and punching his teeth out. I’d been happy that he’d used the feather, until I’d seen Lola’s reaction to it. It had turned her on and she’d been moaning and sliding on the bed. And I’d been crazy with jealousy and madness. And when she’d come, I’d wanted to die. I’d wanted to cut myself into tiny pieces and throw them into the ocean because it was in that moment that I’d know I was scum. The fact that I’d brought her here, the fact that I’d thought this was okay, it showed me that I was no better than the other men here. I loved Lola and I’d betrayed her and myself by trying to get into the inner circle. I knew now that it wasn’t important. But it was too late. It was too late to change any of it. I was angry with
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