sure Jade and I were fed, but the tiny little things one forgets to clean in a house, like the baseboards and window blinds, had been neglected. I was on all fours scrubbing the living room baseboards when the doorbell rang. A deliveryman stood outside with a bouquet of white flowers in his hands.
“Sign here, please.” He pushed the full vase in my hands along with the clipboard. He didn’t even bother asking me if he had the correct address or if I was the person intended for the delivery. I sighed, forcing back the clipboard with the same intensity, and stalked back inside, slamming the door in his face.
Gardenias. Fucking Connor. Setting the crystal vase on the kitchen table, I plucked the small green card from the bouquet. It read:
Adding a little of me to your welcome home party.
The cold little shiver that was only saved for a certain type of his gifts went through me. When we dated and he seemed to know things he shouldn’t, it never really bothered me. In my stupid inexperienced youth, I imagined it was because he loved me so much and his stalking was done to protect me, but now as a twenty-two-year-old woman with experience, I knew the small gifts he sent throughout the years and him knowing things was cause for concern. Like me having a welcome home party when he didn’t know anyone from the bar.
Still, a part of me knew he would never physically hurt me. And then there was my father. Connor would never threaten me or hurt me out of fear of what Don would do. I crumpled the card, throwing it in the trash before Jade freaked out. I finished cleaning, then went to the driveway to clean my bike. I was spraying the tires with the hose when Pete’s truck pulled in and a black SUV stopped along the sidewalk. Turning off the nozzle, I watched as Ava and her cousin Vanessa got out of the vehicle and walked up the steps.
“I brought reinforcement,” Jade said while handing me plastic bags filled with groceries.
I set down the hose quickly before accepting the bags. Inside, we all gathered around the small kitchen, putting away some items and setting others aside to be prepped or cooked. Jade concentrated mainly on trying to keep Ava talking, as Vanessa and I kept quiet around them. I soon realized I was more in the way than I was helping. Pete noticed the look on my face and handed me a bottle of beer, with a small smile on his face. I took it then stepped outside to the front yard, sitting on the concrete steps. Jade was too busy accommodating Ava; she didn’t even notice the flowers. I wondered if I was being ridiculous. I mean, who gets jealous of a friend having other friends?
“The Frog looks good,” Pete said, sitting beside me. He shoved me playfully, making me chuckle.
“Thanks.” I pushed back. We sat silently before I took a large mouthful from my beer. It was barely noon and I was drinking.
“I feel like I’m losing her.” I picked at the label glued to the bottle. Pete breathed like he was trying to find the right words to say.
“You’ll never lose her, Bil. You guys are like sisters…more than sisters. There’s no losing that connection.”
“I feel like a kid fighting for the affection of her mother.” I laughed.
“She’s not replacing you, if that’s what you’re afraid of.”
“I’m not sure why I came back, Pete. She has you, a good job, and friends. Why did I feel like I needed to come back home for her? She’s doing just fine without me.” I couldn’t believe I was saying this out loud, but the more I spoke the heavier the situation I was in hit me.
“Because you needed to believe she needed you back. Even if you coming back had nothing to do with Jade.” I stayed quiet, not sure how to respond to that. “Bil, you’re young, there’re a lot of twenty-two-year-olds that try to go off on their own and fall flat on their faces. That doesn’t mean you’re not good at anything else. Don’t let that be the reason why you’re justifying going back to work for
“Sign here, please.” He pushed the full vase in my hands along with the clipboard. He didn’t even bother asking me if he had the correct address or if I was the person intended for the delivery. I sighed, forcing back the clipboard with the same intensity, and stalked back inside, slamming the door in his face.
Gardenias. Fucking Connor. Setting the crystal vase on the kitchen table, I plucked the small green card from the bouquet. It read:
Adding a little of me to your welcome home party.
The cold little shiver that was only saved for a certain type of his gifts went through me. When we dated and he seemed to know things he shouldn’t, it never really bothered me. In my stupid inexperienced youth, I imagined it was because he loved me so much and his stalking was done to protect me, but now as a twenty-two-year-old woman with experience, I knew the small gifts he sent throughout the years and him knowing things was cause for concern. Like me having a welcome home party when he didn’t know anyone from the bar.
Still, a part of me knew he would never physically hurt me. And then there was my father. Connor would never threaten me or hurt me out of fear of what Don would do. I crumpled the card, throwing it in the trash before Jade freaked out. I finished cleaning, then went to the driveway to clean my bike. I was spraying the tires with the hose when Pete’s truck pulled in and a black SUV stopped along the sidewalk. Turning off the nozzle, I watched as Ava and her cousin Vanessa got out of the vehicle and walked up the steps.
“I brought reinforcement,” Jade said while handing me plastic bags filled with groceries.
I set down the hose quickly before accepting the bags. Inside, we all gathered around the small kitchen, putting away some items and setting others aside to be prepped or cooked. Jade concentrated mainly on trying to keep Ava talking, as Vanessa and I kept quiet around them. I soon realized I was more in the way than I was helping. Pete noticed the look on my face and handed me a bottle of beer, with a small smile on his face. I took it then stepped outside to the front yard, sitting on the concrete steps. Jade was too busy accommodating Ava; she didn’t even notice the flowers. I wondered if I was being ridiculous. I mean, who gets jealous of a friend having other friends?
“The Frog looks good,” Pete said, sitting beside me. He shoved me playfully, making me chuckle.
“Thanks.” I pushed back. We sat silently before I took a large mouthful from my beer. It was barely noon and I was drinking.
“I feel like I’m losing her.” I picked at the label glued to the bottle. Pete breathed like he was trying to find the right words to say.
“You’ll never lose her, Bil. You guys are like sisters…more than sisters. There’s no losing that connection.”
“I feel like a kid fighting for the affection of her mother.” I laughed.
“She’s not replacing you, if that’s what you’re afraid of.”
“I’m not sure why I came back, Pete. She has you, a good job, and friends. Why did I feel like I needed to come back home for her? She’s doing just fine without me.” I couldn’t believe I was saying this out loud, but the more I spoke the heavier the situation I was in hit me.
“Because you needed to believe she needed you back. Even if you coming back had nothing to do with Jade.” I stayed quiet, not sure how to respond to that. “Bil, you’re young, there’re a lot of twenty-two-year-olds that try to go off on their own and fall flat on their faces. That doesn’t mean you’re not good at anything else. Don’t let that be the reason why you’re justifying going back to work for
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