Instinctual 2 by Amanda Mackey

chastised Roxy and not let the pig out of her sight for weeks after that. “I’m surprised the thing survived the washing machine. Maybe that’s how the button eye came off.”
    “Haha. I think it was, if I remember correctly. And poor Roxy! She didn’t like us taking it off her. She had claimed it as hers.”
    “I loved that dog.”
    “She was beautiful. A good friend to Kate.” Jenny then pulled out a photo in a wooden frame of Kate and Roxy sitting side by side in the back garden. Literally in the flower garden. Robert smiled at the photo. Kate had yellow and white daisies tucked into her hair over each ear and had made a daisy chain that she’d placed around Roxy’s neck. Both were grinning madly. Two friends, sharing a special moment. A moment is all it had been too, because in that next second Roxy had rolled on the ground, breaking the daisy chain, chewing the flowers like a new dog toy.
    “Those were good times, Jenny.” Rob looked through the photo. He was right back on that day in that moment, wishing he could turn back the clock and freeze time so he could absorb it all again for longer. Take the time to savor it like a fine wine. To etch every smell, sound, and feeling into his bones. A small tear left his eye and trickled down his cheek.
    After Jenny had placed the photograph on the drawers next to Kate’s bed she turned and said, “There’s going to be plenty more good times, Rob. You have to believe that.”
    “I know. I’m trying, I really am. Looking at that photo though, I wish I’d been around to create more of those wonderful memories instead of being married to my job. I feel like I didn’t do enough, you know?” He wiped his face dry with his fingers as Jenny perched on the edge of Kate’s bed.
    “Honey, you were there. I know the force had you putting in long hours, but emotionally you were always there for Kate. She looked up to you and still does, I know that for a fact. She adores you. So you had to miss a few birthdays and school plays. It’s okay. Kate knew that you were working hard to support the family. We both did. You were a wonderful father to our daughter. Patient and kind. Kate was definitely Daddy’s girl.”
    “You give me too much credit, Jen. I don’t deserve it. I feel like I failed her in some way. Didn’t do enough to keep her safe.”
    “Oh my God! Will you listen to yourself?” Jenny moved onto her knees in front of Rob and placed the palms of her hands on his thighs. “You did everything you could. None of this was your fault. How could you have prevented this? You were in another country!” The words sounded clipped against Rob’s unfounded self-depreciation.
    He touched her hand on his left knee, pulling it up and kissing the palm. “You don’t understand. I promised her. I vowed to keep her safe. I’m a cop, for Christ’s sake! If a member of the law can’t protect his own family, then there’s no hope for anyone else.”
    Rob rose, pushing his chair back and walked to the window, as if that might help make sense of things. He hadn’t taken any of his vows lightly, least of all the vow he’d made to Kate so long ago when he was home to tuck her in bed. How had he failed? Damn it! No matter what Jenny said, he would continue to shoulder that burden.
    Jenny went to follow Rob to the window when Maria walked in, pushing her trolley in front.
    “I’m-a here to change bandages and check vitals.” The curt woman said, not waiting for an answer as she proceeded to take Kate’s blood pressure. “Are you-a mother?” she asked Jenny.
    “Yes. I flew in this morning from the United States.”
    Rob had now turned around and stood leaning against the window frame with his arms folded against his chest, listening but not joining in the conversation, watching the nurse tend to Katie.
    “Ahhh. You a long way from home.”
    “Yes. I couldn’t be anywhere else when my girl is so ill.”
    “It’s such a shame. She very beautiful.”
    Jenny smiled.