start. He looked at the meter on the dashboard as the numbers changed, bringing him closer and closer to a world without the everyday judgment of his mother. A place where maybe, just maybe, there was a chance he would be comfortable enough to make real friends, go out and have fun, maybe even meet someone and have a relationship someday. Even in college, the time in Nathan’s life when he should have been getting out there and experiencing the world, he had been too engrossed in his studies, too controlled by his fears, and too accustomed to hiding who he was to meet anyone.
Nathan’s palms moistened as he got closer to the Capitol Hill neighborhood where the brownstone apartment was for rent. He had heard about Capitol Hill’s gay-friendly neighborhood growing up and had been there once by accident in college, when he was reading a medical digest on the CT bus and missed his stop. He’d seen two guys walking down the street holding hands, seemingly without a care in the world, and he decided right then he was moving there someday.
Someday came six months later, when Nathan graduated from the University of Washington with honors. His professor had showcased his thesis on plant regeneration and its effectiveness in modern medicine at a medical conference. The next day he had three job offers, two from cosmetics companies looking for the fountain of youth, and one from the University of Washington Alzheimer’s Disease Research Center. Nathan still could not believe how fast his life changed. He wanted to move out of state originally, the farther he could get from his mother the better, but he wanted to do something to make a real difference in this world, so he took the job at UW and started saving up money to move out.
It had been a few months now, and Nathan was really enjoying the work. He was in his comfort zone inside the lab. He spent his days analyzing facts and data. There was no human variable of interpretation to deal with. Whenever Nathan made an assumption when dealing with another person, it was without a doubt wrong. His mother was always asking how someone who was supposed to be so smart could be so socially retarded. Nathan hated that word. Sometimes she would mumble under her breath about him being switched at birth. If he didn’t look so much like her, he would wonder the same thing. Nathan was slender, average height, and had his mother’s dark-chestnut hair and petite face. He also had her striking green eyes, but no one ever saw them behind his thick dark-rimmed glasses.
Nathan was pulled out of his mental rambling when he noticed the scenery was no longer moving, and hadn’t been for quite a while because the cab driver was reading a magazine while the meter kept spinning. He looked up and met Nathan’s eyes in the mirror, daring him to question the miles, but of course he wouldn’t. Nathan reached into his bag to grab money out of his wallet, stuck the money in the tray, and got out of the cab.
He stood on the sidewalk looking up at the brick two-story brownstone in front of him as the cab drove away. It was exactly like he had pictured in his head after reading the ad on craigslist, the red brick on one side covered in climbing ivy. The apartment on the right had a window planter filled with white petunias. The front door had the old-style mail slot in it. He was supposed to meet Josh, the guy renting the place, at two o’clock. He glanced at his phone, which read 1:58, and was thankful he’d taken a cab instead of the bus.
He took a deep breath for courage and walked up the front steps leading to black double doors. Someone was just opening them as he got to the top step.
“Oh hey, buddy. You Nathan?” a strikingly handsome tattooed man asked.
“Uh, yeah. Josh?” Nathan tried to act nonchalant, sticking his hand in his pocket and adjusting the strap of his bag across his chest even though he was freaking out inside. He couldn’t even hold conversations with average-looking
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