how much I rather have Jake here with me every step of the way and to see his baby grow and help raise it, there is nothing I want more for Jake than to have him go chase his dreams. That realization is the only reason I did what his father asked.
My life was going to change no matter what. Why do the same to Jake? He has always wanted to be in the NHL. I couldn’t let this take that away from him. I won’t let it. Even though it was only three in the afternoon, I cried myself to sleep and slept until the next morning.
I avoided my father this morning. I felt numb as I drove to school. I spent all morning avoiding Jake. Lunch was when it happened. He came up when I wasn’t looking and cornered me. “Damn it Emily. This is not going to happen. Now tell me what in the hell is going on.” His eyes searched mine as he firmly held onto my shoulders.
I closed my eyes and buried my face in his chest. His arm wrapped around me making me feel protected and loved. His voice was low and soothing. “Shh. It’s going to be okay, Sweetness. I just need to know what’s going on.” He tilts my face up so he can look at me. His thumbs swipe away my tears. I shake my head.
He rests his forehead on mine and closes his eyes. “Emily, please. This is killing me. I just want to know why. If you tell me why you really, truly want this, then I’ll do as you ask.” His eyes pop open and search mine.
I sigh, slip my hand in his, and pull him out of the cafeteria. I lean against the wall and bring his hand to rest over my heart. “Just listen first okay?” He nods. “Your dad called me. He explained to me his wishes and frankly, I agree with him. We both want you to be able to go after your dream, no strings, and that is why I told you that you could leave me.”
Anger flares in his eyes and his hand tenses. “Son of a…”
“ Jake. Please. It makes sense to me.”
“ Bullshit. I’m supposed to let go of my responsibility because my father convinced you that that was what I needed to do? Sweetness, I’m going to be a father in nine months. This is something between you and me. We decide what we should do concerning one another. We’re adults now. We make our own decisions and live with the results. So just answer me this: do you , not my father, do you want me to be there?”
I can’t lie to him. I’m afraid to speak so I just nod. He tucks me into his embrace and kisses the top of my head. “I was so scared,” he whispers. “I love you so much Sweetness.” I squeezed him tighter. I don’t want this moment to end.
I gulp and quietly say, “I still want you to chase your dream, though.” His eyes search mine, looking for something.
Whatever it is, he gives a crooked smile as if he’s found it. “I don’t have to chase my dream, Emily. You are my dream. All I want is you. Anything else is a bonus.”
My heart swells at his words. I give him a sweet kiss. “Let’s go eat.” We return to the lunchroom, grab some lunch, and sit down at the table where Jake leans over and places a kiss on my temple. I smile at him and we eat lunch in a surprising silence.
Having a baby is suppose to be one of the most exciting things in a woman’s life. Being my age and pregnant with my future ripped from my hands is not exciting. Maybe a little shopping will do me good. I’m going to need bigger clothes here shortly anyway and the baby will soon need clothes too.
The next month passed in a blur. Between doctor appointments, classes, finals, and being pregnant in general, it was tough. Jake and I had been discussing our future. His father, of course, wasn’t too happy with me when Jake stormed home and told him to stay out of it. However, the plan is to work the entire summer to save up some money. Then we would go to Charlotte and stay with my grandmother to save some cash. I’ll take online classes while Jake goes to college full time. My grandmother will watch the baby when Jake can’t. We’ll both have jobs
My life was going to change no matter what. Why do the same to Jake? He has always wanted to be in the NHL. I couldn’t let this take that away from him. I won’t let it. Even though it was only three in the afternoon, I cried myself to sleep and slept until the next morning.
I avoided my father this morning. I felt numb as I drove to school. I spent all morning avoiding Jake. Lunch was when it happened. He came up when I wasn’t looking and cornered me. “Damn it Emily. This is not going to happen. Now tell me what in the hell is going on.” His eyes searched mine as he firmly held onto my shoulders.
I closed my eyes and buried my face in his chest. His arm wrapped around me making me feel protected and loved. His voice was low and soothing. “Shh. It’s going to be okay, Sweetness. I just need to know what’s going on.” He tilts my face up so he can look at me. His thumbs swipe away my tears. I shake my head.
He rests his forehead on mine and closes his eyes. “Emily, please. This is killing me. I just want to know why. If you tell me why you really, truly want this, then I’ll do as you ask.” His eyes pop open and search mine.
I sigh, slip my hand in his, and pull him out of the cafeteria. I lean against the wall and bring his hand to rest over my heart. “Just listen first okay?” He nods. “Your dad called me. He explained to me his wishes and frankly, I agree with him. We both want you to be able to go after your dream, no strings, and that is why I told you that you could leave me.”
Anger flares in his eyes and his hand tenses. “Son of a…”
“ Jake. Please. It makes sense to me.”
“ Bullshit. I’m supposed to let go of my responsibility because my father convinced you that that was what I needed to do? Sweetness, I’m going to be a father in nine months. This is something between you and me. We decide what we should do concerning one another. We’re adults now. We make our own decisions and live with the results. So just answer me this: do you , not my father, do you want me to be there?”
I can’t lie to him. I’m afraid to speak so I just nod. He tucks me into his embrace and kisses the top of my head. “I was so scared,” he whispers. “I love you so much Sweetness.” I squeezed him tighter. I don’t want this moment to end.
I gulp and quietly say, “I still want you to chase your dream, though.” His eyes search mine, looking for something.
Whatever it is, he gives a crooked smile as if he’s found it. “I don’t have to chase my dream, Emily. You are my dream. All I want is you. Anything else is a bonus.”
My heart swells at his words. I give him a sweet kiss. “Let’s go eat.” We return to the lunchroom, grab some lunch, and sit down at the table where Jake leans over and places a kiss on my temple. I smile at him and we eat lunch in a surprising silence.
Having a baby is suppose to be one of the most exciting things in a woman’s life. Being my age and pregnant with my future ripped from my hands is not exciting. Maybe a little shopping will do me good. I’m going to need bigger clothes here shortly anyway and the baby will soon need clothes too.
The next month passed in a blur. Between doctor appointments, classes, finals, and being pregnant in general, it was tough. Jake and I had been discussing our future. His father, of course, wasn’t too happy with me when Jake stormed home and told him to stay out of it. However, the plan is to work the entire summer to save up some money. Then we would go to Charlotte and stay with my grandmother to save some cash. I’ll take online classes while Jake goes to college full time. My grandmother will watch the baby when Jake can’t. We’ll both have jobs
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