weatherboards. He held the lantern high in one hand and banged the wall hard with the fist of the other. The wall bowed and shuddered and a plate fell from the dresser on the other side of the room. Stu kicked at the broken pieces.
“I never learned to dance,” he said as he sat down. “I never got the hang of it.”
I was embarrassed. I had a bad conscience about my motives for visiting O’Hagen’s. I leaned to pick up the shards of plate.
“Leave them,” Stu said. “I’ve been wrong. I’ve been very wrong.”
I didn’t know where to look. “You’ve got two fine boys,” I said, “and a good wife.”
“That’s true,” he said, “about the boys at least.” His eyes were brimful of moisture. “I’ll buy the car,” he said, “and I’ll pay the three quid for the lessons.”
I had the papers in my pocket and I could have signed him up there and then. I sat there, worrying at them, folding them back and forth.
“No,” I said, “I couldn’t.”
“Yes, I’ve been a fool. I’ve been a fool in most things. The bloody German is a better farmer than I am. The little coot looks like he’ll blow over in the wind, but he’s made something of that place. He’s
made
something. He’s a lovely little farmer.”
“He is.”
“I’ll buy this Ford,” Stu said, “and I’ll take lessons.”
“I couldn’t,” I said. “I couldn’t let you.”
O’Hagen blinked.
“Well, what,” he said, pulling the demijohn back to his side of the table, “did you come here for?”
“To show you the Ford, that’s true.”
“You came here to come dancing,” O’Hagen said. “You came here to prance around my kitchen.”
“No, I assure you.”
“Well, what for?”
I could not sell a Ford to a weeping man. He made me feel grubby. I too was smitten with the desire to do something decent.
“I told you,” he said, “I’ll take the lessons. I’ll take them.” Tears were now streaming down his cheeks. “I’ll pay the three quid. I don’t care who laughs at me.”
“No one will laugh at you. That’s not the point. The point is the Ford is the wrong car.”
He wiped his eyes with his grubby sleeve. “So Patrick Hare was right then? The Dodge is a better car.”
“Not the Dodge. The Summit. It’s the Summit you should have.”
“What in the name of God is a Summit?” Stu shouted.
“A car,” I shouted back. “A vehicle, made in Australia. An Australian car.”
“An Australian car,” O’Hagen said. “What a presumption.”
“A what?”
“A presumption. Are you sitting there and telling me we can make a better car than the Yanks? God Jesus Christ in Heaven help me. Mary Mother of God,” he whispered and seemed to find her in the gloom above the roof joists. “You’re a salesman, Mr Badgery,” he said. “The country is full of bloody salesmen. You don’t have to know anything to be a salesman. All you need to do is talk. That’s why everyone does it. But if you want to really do something you need some bloody brains, some nous. Now tell me, tell me truly, is this Australian car of yours a better car than the Ford?”
“It’s not the point about better,” I said, “it’s a question of where the money goes. You’d be better off with a worse car if the money stayed here.”
“You’re cock-eyed, man. You’re a bloody hypocrite. You go around making a quid from selling the bloody things, and now you tell me I shouldn’t buy one. You’re making no sense,” Stu sighed. “Sell me the bloody Ford before I lose my temper.”
“I will not,” I said. “If you give me leave I’ll travel up to Melbourne and pick up a Summit and bring it down here. It’s a beautiful vehicle.”
“Is the Summit,” Stu said slowly, “as good as a Ford?”
“The difference is not worth a pig’s fart.”
“A subject,” my host said, “of which you would be ignorant.”
I was never good with drink. I got myself too excited and I did not express myself as well as I
“I never learned to dance,” he said as he sat down. “I never got the hang of it.”
I was embarrassed. I had a bad conscience about my motives for visiting O’Hagen’s. I leaned to pick up the shards of plate.
“Leave them,” Stu said. “I’ve been wrong. I’ve been very wrong.”
I didn’t know where to look. “You’ve got two fine boys,” I said, “and a good wife.”
“That’s true,” he said, “about the boys at least.” His eyes were brimful of moisture. “I’ll buy the car,” he said, “and I’ll pay the three quid for the lessons.”
I had the papers in my pocket and I could have signed him up there and then. I sat there, worrying at them, folding them back and forth.
“No,” I said, “I couldn’t.”
“Yes, I’ve been a fool. I’ve been a fool in most things. The bloody German is a better farmer than I am. The little coot looks like he’ll blow over in the wind, but he’s made something of that place. He’s
made
something. He’s a lovely little farmer.”
“He is.”
“I’ll buy this Ford,” Stu said, “and I’ll take lessons.”
“I couldn’t,” I said. “I couldn’t let you.”
O’Hagen blinked.
“Well, what,” he said, pulling the demijohn back to his side of the table, “did you come here for?”
“To show you the Ford, that’s true.”
“You came here to come dancing,” O’Hagen said. “You came here to prance around my kitchen.”
“No, I assure you.”
“Well, what for?”
I could not sell a Ford to a weeping man. He made me feel grubby. I too was smitten with the desire to do something decent.
“I told you,” he said, “I’ll take the lessons. I’ll take them.” Tears were now streaming down his cheeks. “I’ll pay the three quid. I don’t care who laughs at me.”
“No one will laugh at you. That’s not the point. The point is the Ford is the wrong car.”
He wiped his eyes with his grubby sleeve. “So Patrick Hare was right then? The Dodge is a better car.”
“Not the Dodge. The Summit. It’s the Summit you should have.”
“What in the name of God is a Summit?” Stu shouted.
“A car,” I shouted back. “A vehicle, made in Australia. An Australian car.”
“An Australian car,” O’Hagen said. “What a presumption.”
“A what?”
“A presumption. Are you sitting there and telling me we can make a better car than the Yanks? God Jesus Christ in Heaven help me. Mary Mother of God,” he whispered and seemed to find her in the gloom above the roof joists. “You’re a salesman, Mr Badgery,” he said. “The country is full of bloody salesmen. You don’t have to know anything to be a salesman. All you need to do is talk. That’s why everyone does it. But if you want to really do something you need some bloody brains, some nous. Now tell me, tell me truly, is this Australian car of yours a better car than the Ford?”
“It’s not the point about better,” I said, “it’s a question of where the money goes. You’d be better off with a worse car if the money stayed here.”
“You’re cock-eyed, man. You’re a bloody hypocrite. You go around making a quid from selling the bloody things, and now you tell me I shouldn’t buy one. You’re making no sense,” Stu sighed. “Sell me the bloody Ford before I lose my temper.”
“I will not,” I said. “If you give me leave I’ll travel up to Melbourne and pick up a Summit and bring it down here. It’s a beautiful vehicle.”
“Is the Summit,” Stu said slowly, “as good as a Ford?”
“The difference is not worth a pig’s fart.”
“A subject,” my host said, “of which you would be ignorant.”
I was never good with drink. I got myself too excited and I did not express myself as well as I
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