I Come as a Theif

I Come as a Theif by Louis Auchincloss Page A

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Authors: Louis Auchincloss
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fundamental about the nature of morality? Could a fine mind exist in the head of a criminal?
    "I guess we'd better get down to business, Menzies," he said. "I saved your chestnuts, but I seem not to have got all of my own out of the fire."
    "My dear young man, you're blunt, and I like bluntness. Let me get you a drink."
    The wait seemed interminable. Menzies hovered over a huge bar table, taking stoppers out of decanters, sniffing, measuring drops into spoons, prattling of his prowess in mixtures. But when he finally handed Tony a very small, sweet drink that seemed to have a rum base, his tone changed. He became almost masterful. "I am sorry you were approached by Lassatta. It was entirely unnecessary. Men like you and me, Mr. Lowder, need no intermediaries. I shall be glad to make up to you the balance due, but only on condition that in the future you and I deal exclusively with each other."
    "Why should there be a future?"
    Menzies blinked his eyes, as if with pleasure at his guest's wit. "You mean why should you go through that again? Of course, you shouldn't. And you shan't. Hear what I propose. I propose to establish an account for you in my firm, under the name of a nominee, of course. You will have the privilege of making withdrawals whenever you wish. I suggest that we start with a balance of whatever it was that Lassatta shortchanged you. What was it?"
    "Eighty-six hundred."
    "Very well. Well make it eighty-six hundred. You see, I ask no confirmation, nor do I have any way of checking. I did not even know for certain there
had
been a short change. I simply assumed it, knowing Lassatta. The moment I heard that he was in it, I knew I would have to wait till he had made all his infantile blunders. But I can usually bide my time."
    "For what, Mr. Menzies?"
    "For our partnership. For our little silent partnership. Our little silent exclusive and very profitable partnership. I am suggesting, Mr. Lowder, that you agree to be discreet and honest with all the world—but me. I suggest that at chosen times and in very carefully chosen places, you and I meet to exchange useful bits of information about corporate secrets and government projects. I am an investor, and an investor needs news. That is all. Not much, is it? But on it we can build empires."
    "Empires?"
    "Well, empires of Tiepolos, anyway."
    "You assume I'm going to stay in government. Suppose I go back to my law practice?"
    Menzies shrugged. "Then I've lost my investment. But you won't. You've got politics in your blood now. You'll go far. Besides, you'll have me behind you."
    Tony stared, fascinated, at this small, smiling man. "Why should we trust each other?"
    "Because it will be so much worth our while." Menzies suddenly clapped his small fat hands. "And because I've studied your record. I believe that this has been your first crime. Am I right?"
    "I'm glad you call it a crime, anyway."
    "Oh, I know you," Menzies exclaimed eagerly. "With anyone else, I'd have winked and used the word 'peccadillo.' But not with you. Not with Tony Lowder. You will be both an economist and a realist in crime. You will always know precisely what you are doing, and you will always be sensible enough to do the bare minimum. So long as you have only one Menzies and I only one Lowder, nobody will ever catch us. Nobody will even know were acquainted."
    Tony put down his abominable drink and resumed his roaming of the great room. Never had he felt less a part of the real world. Had it not been for the sugar and grenadine in the cocktail he might have thought he was living in a dream—or in a 1935 movie with Norma Shearer and Clark Gable. Did all great men have a Menzies in their past? And yet what deal could have been more perfectly adapted to his needs? Where, even, was the risk?
    "But it must be understood that it's only you and me," Menzies cautioned him. "So far as Lassatta is concerned, you've become disgusted with bribery. He will have driven you back to grace. And your friend

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