he disliked that she might be out with another man. Michelle liked that.
There was something about Esa’s vulnerability where Nell was concerned that tugged at her. Even though he was so damn clueless sometimes it made her want to strangle him, it also made her want to help him, for Nell’s sake.
David took a sip of wine, his expression mildly perturbed. “Is everything okay?”
“Yes, of course. Why do you ask?”
“You just seem
really
preoccupied.”
“No, it’s just . . .” She realized she could get away with a half truth, at least. “I feel guilty about this. Marcus thinks you’re gay, you know.”
David groaned. “I was wondering about that.”
“He’s been planning to ask you out. I don’t feel it’s my place to tell him he’s misread you.”
David bit into a cracker with cheese. “No, of course not.”
God, Michelle thought, he is such a good guy. Not a moron, like Saari. Not a dog, like Saari. Not an egomaniac, like Saari. You should be attracted to David. But you’re not. What the hell is wrong with you? Instead you’re thinking about a self-centered jerk. Admit it: clueless as Uncle Esa is, he’s hot. And there is some kind of sexual tension there. It could be because she held more power in the house than he did. Or it could be the stirrings of a general attraction. Which didn’t matter, because it could never, ever be acted on. She could lose her job. Worse, she would lose her self-esteem. Assuming she wasn’t imagining things. Which she didn’t think she was.
Christ, another rude reverie. Snap out of it. She pinched her own thigh, hard, and she was back at the wine and cheese table. And there was David, across the table, looking at her with amusement.
Michelle shifted in her seat uncomfortably. “What?”
“You’re really, really off somewhere else in your head tonight, aren’t you? And it has nothing to do with nanny stuff, or Marcus.”
Michelle grimaced guiltily. “I’m sorry.”
“Need to talk about it?”
Yeah: I’m developing a crush on the loser I work for.
“No, I’ll be fine.”
“I have an idea.”
“What’s that?”
“Let’s finish up here, then go hit a movie. Something totally mindless where we can escape for a few hours. Might make you feel better.”
“Yes, let’s,” said Michelle, liking the idea. She wouldn’t have to talk. She could let images and sounds just wash over her. Drown out the stupidity. She liked David. And if she spent more time with him, it could wind up being something more. Couldn’t it?
* * *
“Excuse me. Who
the hell are you?”
Michelle’s guts constricted when she returned from the movies to find Nell laughing and playing Wii bowling not with her uncle Esa, but with some towheaded, brick shit house of a man whose biceps were bigger than Nell’s head.
“It’s Uncle Ulf!” Nell called out distractedly, pumping her fists in the air at the sound of electronic bowling pins going down. “Strike!”
“Way to go!” said “Uncle Ulf.” He closed his hand and fist bumped Nell’s.
“Uncle Ulf,” Michelle said in an overly calm voice as she took off her coat, “I still don’t know who you are.”
“I’m Esa’s teammate.” He extended a hand to her as Michelle walked into the living room. “Very nice to meet you.”
Michelle barely shook his hand. “Where is Esa?”
“He had some things he had to attend to,” Ulf replied vaguely. “I’ve told him before that I don’t mind babysitting, so he called me.” He glanced down at Nell affectionately. “We’ve been having a good time, haven’t we?”
Nell nodded fervently.
The back of Michelle’s head was about to blow off. “Nell, have you met Uncle Ulf before?”
“Well, no, but, I know he plays hockey with Uncle Esa and he already knows how to play Wii bowling . . .” She looked at him smugly. “. . . even though I’m better.”
Ulf narrowed his eyes competitively. “We’ll see.”
Nell looked so happy Michelle almost
There was something about Esa’s vulnerability where Nell was concerned that tugged at her. Even though he was so damn clueless sometimes it made her want to strangle him, it also made her want to help him, for Nell’s sake.
David took a sip of wine, his expression mildly perturbed. “Is everything okay?”
“Yes, of course. Why do you ask?”
“You just seem
really
preoccupied.”
“No, it’s just . . .” She realized she could get away with a half truth, at least. “I feel guilty about this. Marcus thinks you’re gay, you know.”
David groaned. “I was wondering about that.”
“He’s been planning to ask you out. I don’t feel it’s my place to tell him he’s misread you.”
David bit into a cracker with cheese. “No, of course not.”
God, Michelle thought, he is such a good guy. Not a moron, like Saari. Not a dog, like Saari. Not an egomaniac, like Saari. You should be attracted to David. But you’re not. What the hell is wrong with you? Instead you’re thinking about a self-centered jerk. Admit it: clueless as Uncle Esa is, he’s hot. And there is some kind of sexual tension there. It could be because she held more power in the house than he did. Or it could be the stirrings of a general attraction. Which didn’t matter, because it could never, ever be acted on. She could lose her job. Worse, she would lose her self-esteem. Assuming she wasn’t imagining things. Which she didn’t think she was.
Christ, another rude reverie. Snap out of it. She pinched her own thigh, hard, and she was back at the wine and cheese table. And there was David, across the table, looking at her with amusement.
Michelle shifted in her seat uncomfortably. “What?”
“You’re really, really off somewhere else in your head tonight, aren’t you? And it has nothing to do with nanny stuff, or Marcus.”
Michelle grimaced guiltily. “I’m sorry.”
“Need to talk about it?”
Yeah: I’m developing a crush on the loser I work for.
“No, I’ll be fine.”
“I have an idea.”
“What’s that?”
“Let’s finish up here, then go hit a movie. Something totally mindless where we can escape for a few hours. Might make you feel better.”
“Yes, let’s,” said Michelle, liking the idea. She wouldn’t have to talk. She could let images and sounds just wash over her. Drown out the stupidity. She liked David. And if she spent more time with him, it could wind up being something more. Couldn’t it?
* * *
“Excuse me. Who
the hell are you?”
Michelle’s guts constricted when she returned from the movies to find Nell laughing and playing Wii bowling not with her uncle Esa, but with some towheaded, brick shit house of a man whose biceps were bigger than Nell’s head.
“It’s Uncle Ulf!” Nell called out distractedly, pumping her fists in the air at the sound of electronic bowling pins going down. “Strike!”
“Way to go!” said “Uncle Ulf.” He closed his hand and fist bumped Nell’s.
“Uncle Ulf,” Michelle said in an overly calm voice as she took off her coat, “I still don’t know who you are.”
“I’m Esa’s teammate.” He extended a hand to her as Michelle walked into the living room. “Very nice to meet you.”
Michelle barely shook his hand. “Where is Esa?”
“He had some things he had to attend to,” Ulf replied vaguely. “I’ve told him before that I don’t mind babysitting, so he called me.” He glanced down at Nell affectionately. “We’ve been having a good time, haven’t we?”
Nell nodded fervently.
The back of Michelle’s head was about to blow off. “Nell, have you met Uncle Ulf before?”
“Well, no, but, I know he plays hockey with Uncle Esa and he already knows how to play Wii bowling . . .” She looked at him smugly. “. . . even though I’m better.”
Ulf narrowed his eyes competitively. “We’ll see.”
Nell looked so happy Michelle almost
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