Hell Hounds Are for Suckers

Hell Hounds Are for Suckers by Jessica McBrayer Page B

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Authors: Jessica McBrayer
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him. I wasn’t cruel. I wouldn’t just throw him onto the streets. I’d already tried that and he’d found his way back to my car. Goddess knows I couldn’t take him to the pound and have who knows what happen to him. I can’t bear to see anything in a cage. I would just have to find his owner or find a new one for him.
      Six blocks later, I pulled up to my small bungalow in Berkeley and parked in the garage. Unloading the dog paraphernalia and unlocking the door was somewhat of a challenge as the fur ball was under my feet, bouncing back and forth, trying to get inside. I dumped everything on the oak table in the kitchen, tossing the overgrown puppy the bunny squeaker toy. He jumped to get it and ran off to explore. I unpacked and washed the dishes before setting them out with food and water.
    .   In all my one hundred and seventy-one years, I never thought I would allow an animal to live in the house with me. I whipped my head in the direction of the living room as I heard the familiar unearthly growling. In vampire speed, I was next to fur ball to see what was wrong.
      He looked out the front window at a late night jogger. I groaned. He was guarding his territory like he already thought he was home! I reached down and patted him on the head. After all in his doggy brain he was just doing his job. He didn’t waste any time rolling over expecting a belly rub. I found myself laughing for the first time since I moved into my house fifty-seven years ago. He got his belly rub and I got down on the floor to play with him. He licked my face. The laughter was so over when I realized I was now covered in dog slime. I might have mumbled something about leaving him on a farm in the country as I made my way to the bathroom and started getting ready for bed. I intended on reading until dawn, which is the sleepy time for young vamps. My original plans for partying had been abandoned because of fur ball.
    I brushed my teeth and washed my makeup off, climbed into some pajama pants and a tee shirt. It sucked that I still needed to sleep eight hours a day. I was approaching the two hundred mark and supposedly I wouldn’t need to sleep anymore – at least Julian had said I would probably outgrow the need to sleep. I can’t wait. The minute I hit my brass bed the fur ball jumped up and snuggled next to me. He was warm. It was nice to curl up to since being cold-blooded is well – cold. I wrapped my fingers into his soft fur and fell asleep.

               

CHAPTER  3

    Something was licking my face. I shot out of bed ready to attack until I remembered the events of the night before. I looked down to find my  uninvited boarder studying my face with big sad green puppy eyes. Scooping him up, I headed for the kitchen. Thought I’d refresh his water and food dishes. He had drunk some of his water. The food hadn’t been touched.
    “What’s the matter with your food, fur ball? Don’t you like it?”
    Maybe he preferred a different brand. After my shower we’d head back over to the pet store and buy a few more bags. That little glitch resolved, I headed to the nostalgic claw-foot tub in my bathroom and pulled the Ed Hardy curtain around me. I love to sing in the shower and today was Three Days Grace’s Pain. I was toweling off when I noticed fur ball was waiting for me on the rug. I sighed to myself.
    “What are you doing there? Do you need a bath too?”
    He growled his big burly growl. Apparently not.
    “I take that as a no.”
    I flicked some water on him and he jumped, snapping at the droplets.
    “My Grandma, what big teeth you have.” He missed the literary allusion.
    I toweled off before applying my makeup.  Started with plenty of black eyeliner. My short, chunky hair was Edgar Allan Poe Black this week with purple on the tips. Smoky purple eye shadow finished my look matching my hair and nails. Dark.
    The big black fur ball followed me into my bedroom. Had he grown overnight? I focused on my wardrobe. Getting

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