Heavy Metal (A Badboy Rockstar Romance) by Octavia Wildwood Page A

was way hotter than Carl.  If my ex had been put off by my body, what would Brandon think?  He could do so much better than me.  I knew it and he must know it too, even if he was too polite to say so.  I didn’t want to let him down, and I was terrified of disgusting him.
    “Talk to me,” Brandon said, taking my hand and gently guiding me to the bed. 
    I sat down and he sat next to me, still squeezing my hand reassuringly.
    “Is it too soon?” he asked.  “Am I rushing things?”
    “That’s not it,” I said reluctantly, wishing we could go back to how we had been only minutes earlier, when everything in the world had felt right and joyous.  But we couldn’t.  So I took a deep breath, preparing to come clean about my rather substantial weight loss and the scars it had left behind. 
    It was better I tell Brandon about the awful way my body looked beneath my clothes than let him discover it for himself, right?  I couldn’t bear to imagine the look of disappointment he would politely try to conceal once he discovered my lumpy cottage cheese thighs and stretch mark covered abdomen.
    “What is it then?” he pressed.  “You can tell me.  It’s okay.”
    As soon as I opened my mouth to speak, I lost my nerve.  Brandon thought I was beautiful, and though I didn’t believe it myself, it felt amazing to have a guy look at me the way he did.  I wasn’t ready for that to stop – would any woman be?  So I made an excuse.
    “I guess maybe it does feel like things are moving kind of fast,” I admitted, even though I desperately wanted to take things to the next level with him.  “Sorry, I didn’t mean to give you the wrong idea.”
    “There’s no need to apologize,” he said with absolutely no trace of irritation in his voice.  “We can wait as long as you want.  Would it be okay if I held you again?  No wandering hands this time, promise.”
    Smiling, I nodded and climbed back onto the bed.  Brandon did the same and wrapped his body around mine, spooning me.  His arms felt safe and strong as they embraced me, and the feeling of being held was amazing.  True to his word, he didn’t try to make another move on me.  He simply cradled me in his arms, his face resting against mine.
    We were both fully clothed and all we were doing was cuddling.  There was nothing particularly sensual about it from an outsider’s perspective, and yet it was the most intimacy I had ever experienced with a man.  It was better than sex, way more fulfilling and satisfying.  It was bliss.
    “Stay,” Brandon murmured, his hot breath tickling my ear as he whispered.  “I can’t stand the thought of you leaving.  I don’t want to be without you.  Don’t go.  We can figure it all out later, all the little details.  I will do whatever it takes to make you happy.  Just please Hayley, say you’ll stay with me.”
    How could I pass up a request like that from a man like Brandon?
    “I’ll stay,” I told him without hesitation, the words like music to my ears.  “I’ll stay with you.”
     
    Chapter 11
    “Carl please, just throw my stuff in a box and pack up the cat’s things for me,” I implored. 
    It was mid-afternoon and the tour bus had rolled into its next stop.  Everyone was staying a hotel instead of on the bus, and I was on the phone in my room, pacing in agitation.  I’d finally forced myself to call Carl and the phone call wasn’t exactly going smoothly.  But I would have been foolish to expect otherwise.
    He hadn’t taken the news that I was gone for good well at all.  I doubted his ego could handle it.
    “I’m not doing it,” he insisted.  “If you want your shit, come and get it yourself.”
    “Carl, I can’t do that.”
    “Can’t or won’t?” he demanded. 
    I sighed.  “It will only take you ten minutes to get my stuff together.  I will make arrangements for someone to pick everything up and drive it out to me.  It won’t cost you a thing – I’ll take care of