Good Intentions by Joy Fielding

that it was pointless to try forcing them to eat more. They ate little on Saturday mornings since the separation. Lynn assumed they were nervous and excited about seeing their father. Today they were especially anxious. Their father was taking them for the whole weekend. Lynn had heard Megan get up to go to the bathroom three times duringthe night. The child’s overnight bag, packed so tightly its zipper wouldn’t close, had been sitting in front of her bedroom door for two days.
    “Where do you think Daddy’s going to take us?” Nicholas asked, returning to the kitchen and watching his mother stack the dishes in the dishwasher.
    “I don’t know, sweetheart.” Your father doesn’t discuss these things with me anymore, Lynn added silently.
    “Do you think he’ll take us to Disney World?”
    “We were just
at
Disney World,” Lynn reminded him. Two months before your father left, she thought.
    “I know. But we didn’t get to go on all the rides. And Daddy said we could go again.”
    “Well, that’s something you’ll have to talk over with Daddy.” Would she ever get over this strange sensation of being excluded from her children’s lives whenever the subject of their father came up?
    “I bet he’s taking us to Disney World,” Nicholas said confidently.
    “Well, don’t get your hopes up, honey. But I’m sure that wherever Daddy takes you, you’ll have a good time.” Why did she say that? She wasn’t sure of any such thing.
    The doorbell rang.
    “Daddy!”
    “Why don’t you answer the door,” Lynn began, but Nicholas was already running toward the front hall. “I’ll just wait here in the kitchen with the rest of the servants,” Lynn muttered, hearing her husband’s voice, seeing him in her mind as he bent down to scoop up their young son. She pictured the dimples that creased his handsome face, and her hand groped toward the kitchen counter for support. “When does this feeling stop?” sheasked, catching her reflection in the smoky glass of the microwave oven.
    Nicholas came bounding back into the room. “Daddy wants to talk to you.”
    Lynn forced a smile onto her lips. “Why don’t you make sure you have everything ready to go,” she suggested. Again Nicholas was gone before she could complete her sentence.
    Gary was standing in the living room, staring out the large picture window that faced toward the ocean, in much the same position Marc Cameron had assumed the week before. He was wearing a new sports jacket, a sure sign, Lynn decided, that Disney World was not on the day’s agenda.
    “Hi, Gary.” Lynn cleared her throat self-consciously, making sure she was still smiling.
    “Lynn,” he said warmly, turning toward her without moving. “You look great.”
    “Thank you. How are you?”
    “Good. Great,” he corrected, unnecessary emphasis on the final word. “You?”
    “Pretty good. The kids are really excited about this weekend.”
    A look of guilt laced with unexpected defiance cut across Gary’s face, his lips wavering between a smile and a frown. “That’s what I wanted to talk to you about,” he said slowly. “Something’s come up. I’m afraid I won’t be able to take the kids for the whole weekend the way we planned.”
    “What are you talking about? We decided weeks ago. It was your idea.” The sentences tumbled out before Lynn could stop them.
    “I know that, and I’m sorry.”
    “You’re sorry.” Lynn pictured Megan’s overnight bag sitting expectantly in front of her bedroom door. “The kids have been counting on …”
    “I know that. Look, what is this in aid of? Are you trying to make me feel guilty?”
    “I’m trying to understand,” she answered.
    “What’s there to understand? It’s simple. I can’t take the kids for the weekend. I’ll take them next time. I’m not saying I can’t take them for the day. I just won’t be able to keep them overnight, that’s all.”
    That’s all, Lynn repeated silently. “What about
my
plans?”