don’t tell me he’s going to blame me for ruining his relationship with Lucy. “What are you talking about, then?” I ask. Part of me needs to know, and the other part of me really doesn’t want to.
He continues staring. “Emily, think for a second. What have you done recently which has upset the guy that is absolutely crazy about you?”
“You mean Declan? He’ll get over the fact that I don’t want a long-term thing,” I say.
He smacks his head against his forehead. “Barry, Emily!”
“What about Barry?”
He looks like he wants to scream. “Well, he’s not exactly thrilled about you and Declan, is he?”
“No, but – it’s not because he’s in love with me or anything, Andrew,” I say, finally understanding what he’s trying to tell me.
“What makes you so sure?”
“Because he’d tell me,” I say.
“It’s not always easy to tell people how you feel,” he says.
“Yeah, but if you know them . . .”
“It’s even harder.” He sighs. “I mean, I told Lucy how I felt, and now I have this really, really expensive engagement ring sitting at home gathering dust and a ‘serious talk’ after school.”
“Tell her you’re willing to wait. That you’re sorry for rushing her into this and that on consideration, it’s too early to think about marriage.”
“Yeah, but –”
“Unless of course you want to keep insisting that she should be ready, and lose her,” I say.
“I’ll talk to her. I just wish she was willing to show people how much she cares about me.”
“She’s got ‘Lucy loves Andrew’ written over all her books at school,” I say.
“That’s not the same,” he says, but laughs.
“Yeah, I know. It’s not grown-up enough, is it? But she’s not . She’s only just turned eighteen. Look, I know we all like playing at being grown-ups. We talk about politics and issues and relationships and all that stuff – but we’re not grown up. Not yet.”
“Speak for yourself,” he says, and smiles. “Thanks.”
“No problem,” I say.
Chapter Forty-Seven
Unsurprisingly enough, I find myself thinking about what Andrew said as I walk home. Everything’s swirling around in my head and none of it makes any sense. I mean – Barry. And – liking me. And – no. It’s ridiculous. Andrew doesn’t know what he’s talking about.
Because no one really knows what they’re talking about when it comes to me and Barry. Everyone thinks they’ve got us figured out, everyone thinks that we’re secretly lusting after each other and that there’s a ‘spark’ between us – and they don’t have a clue.
I mean, of course he’s attractive. But the fact that I can see this doesn’t mean that I’m attracted to him. There’s a difference.
If we liked each other we’d have done something about it at this stage. We’re hardly shy. Of course, we’d be terrible in a relationship. It’d never last. We’d be cheating on each other within a week. It would never work out between us.
Only, you know, it might. We could have a perfect future together in that stylish apartment with the wide-screen TV and modern art and double bed. No, I need to get my mind out of the gutter.
It really likes it there, though.
What is this? I mean, suddenly I’m thinking about Barry in a new light, and the guy who has been my best friend for years is now suddenly potential boyfriend material. It makes no sense. I can’t believe I’m letting everyone else’s opinions get to me like this. Because that must be it. There’s no other logical explanation.
Chapter Forty-Eight
Lucy still hasn’t called by eight o’clock, so I end up ringing her to see what happened. She sounds happy and giggly when she answers. “Hey, Em!”
“Heya. You sound pretty cheerful.”
“I am indeed. I was just about to call you, actually. I have some wonderful news for you.”
Wonderful news? That she’s not breaking up with Andrew, I hope.
“I’m engaged!” she sings.
My
He continues staring. “Emily, think for a second. What have you done recently which has upset the guy that is absolutely crazy about you?”
“You mean Declan? He’ll get over the fact that I don’t want a long-term thing,” I say.
He smacks his head against his forehead. “Barry, Emily!”
“What about Barry?”
He looks like he wants to scream. “Well, he’s not exactly thrilled about you and Declan, is he?”
“No, but – it’s not because he’s in love with me or anything, Andrew,” I say, finally understanding what he’s trying to tell me.
“What makes you so sure?”
“Because he’d tell me,” I say.
“It’s not always easy to tell people how you feel,” he says.
“Yeah, but if you know them . . .”
“It’s even harder.” He sighs. “I mean, I told Lucy how I felt, and now I have this really, really expensive engagement ring sitting at home gathering dust and a ‘serious talk’ after school.”
“Tell her you’re willing to wait. That you’re sorry for rushing her into this and that on consideration, it’s too early to think about marriage.”
“Yeah, but –”
“Unless of course you want to keep insisting that she should be ready, and lose her,” I say.
“I’ll talk to her. I just wish she was willing to show people how much she cares about me.”
“She’s got ‘Lucy loves Andrew’ written over all her books at school,” I say.
“That’s not the same,” he says, but laughs.
“Yeah, I know. It’s not grown-up enough, is it? But she’s not . She’s only just turned eighteen. Look, I know we all like playing at being grown-ups. We talk about politics and issues and relationships and all that stuff – but we’re not grown up. Not yet.”
“Speak for yourself,” he says, and smiles. “Thanks.”
“No problem,” I say.
Chapter Forty-Seven
Unsurprisingly enough, I find myself thinking about what Andrew said as I walk home. Everything’s swirling around in my head and none of it makes any sense. I mean – Barry. And – liking me. And – no. It’s ridiculous. Andrew doesn’t know what he’s talking about.
Because no one really knows what they’re talking about when it comes to me and Barry. Everyone thinks they’ve got us figured out, everyone thinks that we’re secretly lusting after each other and that there’s a ‘spark’ between us – and they don’t have a clue.
I mean, of course he’s attractive. But the fact that I can see this doesn’t mean that I’m attracted to him. There’s a difference.
If we liked each other we’d have done something about it at this stage. We’re hardly shy. Of course, we’d be terrible in a relationship. It’d never last. We’d be cheating on each other within a week. It would never work out between us.
Only, you know, it might. We could have a perfect future together in that stylish apartment with the wide-screen TV and modern art and double bed. No, I need to get my mind out of the gutter.
It really likes it there, though.
What is this? I mean, suddenly I’m thinking about Barry in a new light, and the guy who has been my best friend for years is now suddenly potential boyfriend material. It makes no sense. I can’t believe I’m letting everyone else’s opinions get to me like this. Because that must be it. There’s no other logical explanation.
Chapter Forty-Eight
Lucy still hasn’t called by eight o’clock, so I end up ringing her to see what happened. She sounds happy and giggly when she answers. “Hey, Em!”
“Heya. You sound pretty cheerful.”
“I am indeed. I was just about to call you, actually. I have some wonderful news for you.”
Wonderful news? That she’s not breaking up with Andrew, I hope.
“I’m engaged!” she sings.
My
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