(Glory St Clair 11) Real Vampires Say Read My Hips by Gerry Bartlett Page A
Authors: Gerry Bartlett
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nearby made me jump.
“Don’t even think about it.” Mars stretched out a hand and fire flared toward the man in the next cage.
“Word is that you have claimed the bitch Gloriana as your own. I see it must be true. But you obviously don’t care much for the bargain. Since you threw her in this prison.” Achelous laughed and capered about in his cage. Naked, he wasn’t his usual imposing figure. Instead, he looked like a creepy scarecrow, his once handsomely muscled frame having shrunk since I last saw him. He was also covered in bruises, burns and cuts, some healing, some fresh and bleeding. I couldn’t stand to look at him.
I turned away and laid my hand on Mars’ arm. “I have given you my word. Will you unlock Jerry’s cage and let him out now?”
“I’ll catch hell from your mother if I do and you go back on your promise, Gloriana.” Mars glanced at Achelous, clearly uneasy discussing this in front of the god.
“I swear. Let him go. I just want to say good-bye. But not here. We must take him out, clean him up and help him recover before we send him back.” I didn’t care who heard me. “Please, Dad.”
“Ooo, listen to the bitch. Sounds a bit too much like her mother for my taste. Watch out, Mars. Do as she says and you might be crossing Hebe. The goddess will eat your stones for breakfast, sautéed over an open flame and served with a sauce made from whatever she can whip from your sadly depleted manhood if you go against her. You know that’s true.” Achelous cackled and moved close to the barred door. “Mars, I can see this one is already twisting you around her dainty fingers.” He looked me up and down. “Not so dainty. Been hitting the pastries a little hard up here, Gloriana?”
“Shut up!” I aimed a finger at him. If Mars and my grandmother could shoot fire, maybe I could. I gasped when a flame striped Achelous’s chest.
“Zeus’s balls! Where’d you learn that trick?” Achelous backed up.
“My dear old dad. Now leave us alone.” I glanced up at Mars and got an approving wink.
“Very well, let’s get him out of here. Hebe can’t be too upset if I allow you to give him a proper send-off. She just wants to be rid of him.” Mars gestured and we were suddenly surrounded by a half-dozen soldiers. “Get the mortal out and take him to my quarters. Make him presentable, then bring him to my daughter’s rooms. I expect him to be lucid and ready to greet her in an hour. Understood?”
There was a murmur of “Yes, sire.” Then the men opened the door and bundled Jerry away before I could do more than touch his filthy cheek. He never opened his eyes.
#
I’d been content to let the handmaidens scrub my back and wash my hair until I finally got the stench of that horrible place out of my nostrils, but now I was swathed in a fluffy robe wondering what next. Of course that was my mother’s cue to appear by my side. We were in my massive closet, full of clothes I wouldn’t be able to fit into even with the help of a crowbar.
“Go away. I can’t believe you did this to me.” I sat on the bench in the middle of the room, my back to the mirror. Of course I wasn’t talking about my size. “But forget me. I’ll never forgive you for what you did to Jerry.”
“That man!” Mother stood in front of me, as usual perfection itself. “I would think my own predicament here would teach you something about how making a fool of yourself over a man can lead to nothing but regret.”
I jumped to my feet, refusing to look up at her. “Now the truth comes out. Have you told Mars about these ‘regrets?’?” I reeled when she slapped my face.
“Guard your tongue.” She looked around then sank down on the bench. “I love him but you see how complicated things are now.”
I held my hand to my burning cheek. “Ah, so I’ve gone from a regret to a complication. Thanks a lot, Mother.” I let my hand fall to my side. Send Jerry and me home and maybe you can smooth thing out
“Don’t even think about it.” Mars stretched out a hand and fire flared toward the man in the next cage.
“Word is that you have claimed the bitch Gloriana as your own. I see it must be true. But you obviously don’t care much for the bargain. Since you threw her in this prison.” Achelous laughed and capered about in his cage. Naked, he wasn’t his usual imposing figure. Instead, he looked like a creepy scarecrow, his once handsomely muscled frame having shrunk since I last saw him. He was also covered in bruises, burns and cuts, some healing, some fresh and bleeding. I couldn’t stand to look at him.
I turned away and laid my hand on Mars’ arm. “I have given you my word. Will you unlock Jerry’s cage and let him out now?”
“I’ll catch hell from your mother if I do and you go back on your promise, Gloriana.” Mars glanced at Achelous, clearly uneasy discussing this in front of the god.
“I swear. Let him go. I just want to say good-bye. But not here. We must take him out, clean him up and help him recover before we send him back.” I didn’t care who heard me. “Please, Dad.”
“Ooo, listen to the bitch. Sounds a bit too much like her mother for my taste. Watch out, Mars. Do as she says and you might be crossing Hebe. The goddess will eat your stones for breakfast, sautéed over an open flame and served with a sauce made from whatever she can whip from your sadly depleted manhood if you go against her. You know that’s true.” Achelous cackled and moved close to the barred door. “Mars, I can see this one is already twisting you around her dainty fingers.” He looked me up and down. “Not so dainty. Been hitting the pastries a little hard up here, Gloriana?”
“Shut up!” I aimed a finger at him. If Mars and my grandmother could shoot fire, maybe I could. I gasped when a flame striped Achelous’s chest.
“Zeus’s balls! Where’d you learn that trick?” Achelous backed up.
“My dear old dad. Now leave us alone.” I glanced up at Mars and got an approving wink.
“Very well, let’s get him out of here. Hebe can’t be too upset if I allow you to give him a proper send-off. She just wants to be rid of him.” Mars gestured and we were suddenly surrounded by a half-dozen soldiers. “Get the mortal out and take him to my quarters. Make him presentable, then bring him to my daughter’s rooms. I expect him to be lucid and ready to greet her in an hour. Understood?”
There was a murmur of “Yes, sire.” Then the men opened the door and bundled Jerry away before I could do more than touch his filthy cheek. He never opened his eyes.
#
I’d been content to let the handmaidens scrub my back and wash my hair until I finally got the stench of that horrible place out of my nostrils, but now I was swathed in a fluffy robe wondering what next. Of course that was my mother’s cue to appear by my side. We were in my massive closet, full of clothes I wouldn’t be able to fit into even with the help of a crowbar.
“Go away. I can’t believe you did this to me.” I sat on the bench in the middle of the room, my back to the mirror. Of course I wasn’t talking about my size. “But forget me. I’ll never forgive you for what you did to Jerry.”
“That man!” Mother stood in front of me, as usual perfection itself. “I would think my own predicament here would teach you something about how making a fool of yourself over a man can lead to nothing but regret.”
I jumped to my feet, refusing to look up at her. “Now the truth comes out. Have you told Mars about these ‘regrets?’?” I reeled when she slapped my face.
“Guard your tongue.” She looked around then sank down on the bench. “I love him but you see how complicated things are now.”
I held my hand to my burning cheek. “Ah, so I’ve gone from a regret to a complication. Thanks a lot, Mother.” I let my hand fall to my side. Send Jerry and me home and maybe you can smooth thing out
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