anymore?”
Jake blinks a
few times then looks around like I’m an idiot. When his gaze focuses on my
face, I see him calming. His long fingers caress my cheek and his eyes lose
some of their rage.
“Come,” I say
again, holding out my arms.
Jake sighs
like he’s humoring me by obeying. He doesn’t want soothing. He wants to rage,
but the anger has nowhere to go.
Resting his
head against my chest, he lets me hold him. He is too large to play the role of
a child, yet I comfort him like I might a little boy. Caressing his head, my
fingers gently play with the wet strands of his dark hair. Jake adjusts in the
water and relaxes against me. He’s in my hands and it’s my duty to sway his
heart from the fury of the past. I know the anger he feels can never be
satisfied. No death or vengeance will bring him true peace. The swamp child
knows only pain and hate.
“You are so
beautiful,” I whisper, consoling the boy whose mother never consoled him. “I
love you so much.”
Jake says
nothing. His gaze is focused on the sign displaying pool rules. His mind is far
away to a time when he was powerless and alone. As my fingers tenderly trace
his face then graze his shoulder, I remind Jake the swamp is gone and he’s
free. No longer powerless and alone, he is a fearsome man with a woman who
loves him.
I hum Jingle
Bells because it’s the only song I know. Jake looks up at me and his gaze
is free of the anger from earlier. The corners of his mouth lift into a hint of
a smile then he sighs and returns to staring at the sign. We are together in
the now because of me. For once, I have the power to make the past fall away.
Jake has
saved me and I can save him too.
25 Spent Shells
Gator
The city is
driving me crazy and I need to get Mia to Nicaragua. The only way to be free is
to finish the job, so I end the life of the final target on Carz’s list.
A big man
with little eyes, he doesn’t die easy. He fights me, but I’m more than big. I’m
strong and he only prolongs the death he deserves. After he’s dead, I look
around his apartment and see pictures of small undressed children. Many are
smiling, so unaware. Those who understand don’t smile.
Leaving
behind the dead pedophile, I think about Carz who ordered these deaths. All of
them, except Mia, were people who deserved to die for their crimes against
others. However, Carz didn’t kill them for their evil. These people were his
friends and employees. He killed them to protect himself from paying for crimes
he’s committed. These people were innocent of his suspicions, yet guilty of so
much evil.
Thinking
back, I remember how I almost didn’t take the job because of my hatred for
Carz. Now, I have Mia and have reduced the amount of filth in the world. With
Carz’s death, I’ll make the world a little better too.
A gift is
given to me as I drive away from the big man’s building and see the woman who
gave Mia life. She is standing on a corner, frowning at everything. Worn down
by a long life of selfishness, she looks smaller than Mia. I stop my car and
leave it without thinking. My mind focuses on how Mia only wanted to go to
school, but her mother forced her to satisfy the desires of monsters.
Her name is
Lis and she tells me she has an amazing tongue. I say no more than two words to
her while she shares everything with me. We walk to her place nearby and she’s
nearly bouncing off the walls. I think she might be high, but mostly she’s
excited to fuck someone who doesn’t make her struggle with the urge to vomit.
“You have any
kids?” I ask as we enter her tiny apartment. “You have any family?”
“No, baby,”
she says, reaching for me.
I dodge her
filthy touch. “What was Gidget’s name as a baby?”
Lis frowns at
me. “Are we going to fuck or not? I ain’t looking to walk down memory lane when
there’s money to be made.”
She’s just as
vile as I imagined. A little part of me hoped she might show regret over the
child
Jake blinks a
few times then looks around like I’m an idiot. When his gaze focuses on my
face, I see him calming. His long fingers caress my cheek and his eyes lose
some of their rage.
“Come,” I say
again, holding out my arms.
Jake sighs
like he’s humoring me by obeying. He doesn’t want soothing. He wants to rage,
but the anger has nowhere to go.
Resting his
head against my chest, he lets me hold him. He is too large to play the role of
a child, yet I comfort him like I might a little boy. Caressing his head, my
fingers gently play with the wet strands of his dark hair. Jake adjusts in the
water and relaxes against me. He’s in my hands and it’s my duty to sway his
heart from the fury of the past. I know the anger he feels can never be
satisfied. No death or vengeance will bring him true peace. The swamp child
knows only pain and hate.
“You are so
beautiful,” I whisper, consoling the boy whose mother never consoled him. “I
love you so much.”
Jake says
nothing. His gaze is focused on the sign displaying pool rules. His mind is far
away to a time when he was powerless and alone. As my fingers tenderly trace
his face then graze his shoulder, I remind Jake the swamp is gone and he’s
free. No longer powerless and alone, he is a fearsome man with a woman who
loves him.
I hum Jingle
Bells because it’s the only song I know. Jake looks up at me and his gaze
is free of the anger from earlier. The corners of his mouth lift into a hint of
a smile then he sighs and returns to staring at the sign. We are together in
the now because of me. For once, I have the power to make the past fall away.
Jake has
saved me and I can save him too.
25 Spent Shells
Gator
The city is
driving me crazy and I need to get Mia to Nicaragua. The only way to be free is
to finish the job, so I end the life of the final target on Carz’s list.
A big man
with little eyes, he doesn’t die easy. He fights me, but I’m more than big. I’m
strong and he only prolongs the death he deserves. After he’s dead, I look
around his apartment and see pictures of small undressed children. Many are
smiling, so unaware. Those who understand don’t smile.
Leaving
behind the dead pedophile, I think about Carz who ordered these deaths. All of
them, except Mia, were people who deserved to die for their crimes against
others. However, Carz didn’t kill them for their evil. These people were his
friends and employees. He killed them to protect himself from paying for crimes
he’s committed. These people were innocent of his suspicions, yet guilty of so
much evil.
Thinking
back, I remember how I almost didn’t take the job because of my hatred for
Carz. Now, I have Mia and have reduced the amount of filth in the world. With
Carz’s death, I’ll make the world a little better too.
A gift is
given to me as I drive away from the big man’s building and see the woman who
gave Mia life. She is standing on a corner, frowning at everything. Worn down
by a long life of selfishness, she looks smaller than Mia. I stop my car and
leave it without thinking. My mind focuses on how Mia only wanted to go to
school, but her mother forced her to satisfy the desires of monsters.
Her name is
Lis and she tells me she has an amazing tongue. I say no more than two words to
her while she shares everything with me. We walk to her place nearby and she’s
nearly bouncing off the walls. I think she might be high, but mostly she’s
excited to fuck someone who doesn’t make her struggle with the urge to vomit.
“You have any
kids?” I ask as we enter her tiny apartment. “You have any family?”
“No, baby,”
she says, reaching for me.
I dodge her
filthy touch. “What was Gidget’s name as a baby?”
Lis frowns at
me. “Are we going to fuck or not? I ain’t looking to walk down memory lane when
there’s money to be made.”
She’s just as
vile as I imagined. A little part of me hoped she might show regret over the
child
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