beautiful and it overflowed the eyes and soul after the depth and truth we had seen.
We stayed in the mountains and I skated every day. My turtle lived in the bathtub and the maids were terrified of it! My sister and I played a lot together and visited the ponds and rivers and rolled in the grass. It was as if my sister was saying goodbye to me but I did not know this. One day my sister and I were sitting on a towel in the garden and we placed my turtle in the middle of us so it could have some fresh air as we read our books. After only a few minutes of reading I looked up and saw my turtle had vanished. We panicked and started calling out its name as if it would run in turtle terms, or slowly walk in human terms, back to us! We searched and searched. But the grass was vast and green and the turtle was green, so it was an impossible feat. There was a river nearby and we went up and down it asking our neighbors if they had seen a turtle walk by! They must have thought we were nuts! This was all to no avail and my Xie Xie was gone. I was so afraid to tell my mother, but after scolding us for not looking after my pet properly she comforted me as I wept. For days after this we kept on looking. I still to this day hope it is alive and hopefully found a better home in the Swiss wilderness.
After a couple of weeks it was time for my parents and me to go back to Tokyo. I did not know this at the time but my sister was actually to stay in Switzerland and not return with us to Japan. She was to complete a skating test and then head off to University. She would live with my aunt near the university she was to attend. I am not sure if I was not told this, or I was too young to quite comprehend, or I was too engulfed in my own world, but nevertheless I remember being somewhere in the Swiss alps and my parents and me hugging my sister and crying profusely, then getting into the car and asking my mother and father why my sister wasnât coming with us. I started feeling like my heart was being torn apart.
Then I remember so vividly being in the back seat of the car, my mother and father in front crying and my looking through the rear view window to wave at my sister. I still see her today standing on top of the hill wearing blue and white sweatpants and sweatshirt as our car slowly inched away from her down the hill. She looked to me like little girl, so lost and scared, and I still to this day feel the rip in my heart. I asked my mother and father if I would ever see her again and they reassured me that of course I would. But I did not see it that way. I felt she was taken away from me and I was so scared and worried that I never would see her again.
My sister and I, although I havenât mentioned her that often, have a special bond and there is no denying it. What drew us apart was the fact that we had so many years difference in age that our experiences and our lives were on two different paths. They never crossed. My sister let me believe in my visions like Santa Claus and the tooth fairy for the longest time, and most importantly she was a great example of determination, confidence and dedication. She let me keep my innocence no matter how much she longed for it too. Our destiny of our sisterhood had yet to evolve and hopefully would one day.
Back in Tokyo it was all business. School would start soon again and training was back in full force. Competitions were nearing and I had the first one come right up as if to smack me in the face. I, understandably after such a long holiday, did not do my very best, but I won, and I felt proud. My coach did not agree with us and was not pleased. We had let him down and his opinion mattered more than ours. Well, I guessed the only resolution was more work.
My mother and I always carefully and delicately chose the music choices I skated to for each competitive season. When I was in school my mother would be in the music store for hours and surprise me with all the choices in the car on
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