From Dream to Destiny: The Ten Tests You Must Go Through to Fulfill God's Purpose for Your Life by Robert Morris Page B

has set us free from sin and iniquity by His atoning work on the Cross. But if we don’t allow Him to set us free in the area of iniquity, we will give our children an inheritance we don’t want them to have.
    Impurity Is Always Lust, Not Love
    To young people, I would say, “If you’re dating someone and they say, ‘If you love me, you’ll do it,’ that is a lie.” Impurity is always lust, never love!If you are in an adulterous relationship, it is not love; it is lust. Potiphar’s wife did not love Joseph—she lusted after him. If she loved him, she would not have lied about him and allowed him to sit in a prison for 10 years.
    Most sin is born of selfishness, and lust is the most selfish sin there is. Lust does not want gratification for anyone but self. Lust doesn’t care whether the spouse gets hurt. Lust doesn’t care if the kids get hurt. If you allow it, lust will take over. And it will affect not only you, but your family as well. You need to know that.
    Sexual immorality has consequences (and they are not the consequences that love produces). Those consequences bring great pain and heartache, and we need to make sure our children understand that. Sometimes we don’t adequately explain to them why God says, “Don’t step over that line.” God is not a prude who does not want you to have fun. God warns you to not step over that line because He knows that pain and death are on the other side. He loves you, and He doesn’t want you to take that road to destruction!
    I was once asked by a young couple, “If we love each other, and we’re going to get married anyway, what difference does a piece of paper make?”
    “None,” was my reply. “The piece of paper [marriage license] makes no difference at all. I’ll tell you what does make a difference, though—the blessing of God. It makes all the difference in the world!”
    Who would not want the blessing of God on their sexual relationship with their spouse? When we walk in obedience to God, we will have His blessing. But if we walk in disobedience to God, we have invited destruction into that area of our lives—and the only way to close that door is through repentance.
    Young people are under tremendous pressure from the world to compromise, and they need to understand these truths. But some couples who have been married for years also need to understand this—because they may have opened this door and don’t know how to shut it. Well, if that last statement describes you, please keep reading—I can help you shut that door!
    I have observed that premarital sex can open the door to dissatisfaction with sex after the wedding vows have been spoken. Because if you are going to have premarital sex, you will have to sneak around to do it.All impurity involves deception. So if you had premarital sex, you had to do some sneaking around. And that developed an appetite for “sneaking around sex”—an appetite God never intended you to develop. By compromising in this way, you set your marriage up for failure.
    I know that may seem like a strong statement, but I have witnessed the sad results of this all too often. When I counsel couples that have gone through adultery, I have learned to ask them about this: “I’m not trying to pry, but I need to know, so we can shut a door. Did the two of you have premarital sex?” In nearly every case they say, “Yes.”
    Here is how it happens. When you have premarital sex, you sneak around and get butterflies in your stomach. You get that adrenaline rush because you’re doing something that is forbidden and exciting. But after you get married, you don’t have to sneak around anymore, and that adrenaline rush is gone. Then the man will start to say, “It’s just not the same,” and he’ll want to begin to do other things—X-rated videos, pornography and other things like that—because he is trying to satisfy an appetite that was created by sin.
    That is why a man will begin to talk to the secretary at his