Fight or Flight by Jamie Canosa

turned to face him . But it wasn’t him . It was someone else. Someone younger. Someone who looked nearly as frightened as she felt. Jay! It was Jay.
    “Em!” He scurried off her paper bed and hunkered down so that he was at eye level with her, but with enough space between them that her urge to flee subsided. “I’m so sorry, Em. Christ, I’m such an idiot. I wasn’t thinking. You looked so cold and I just . . . Such an idiot. I’m so sorry. Are you all right?”
    Jay’s face was scrunched with worry and he was breathing as hard as she was. She must have scared the crap out of him, screaming bloody murder like that. Dammit . She had so many issues she couldn’t even be near someone else without having a breakdown and chasing them away.
    As the remnants of the nightmare cleared from her hazy brain, the pieces started to fall into place. She’d been cold, so Jay had . . . what? Held her? Slept with her? In her conscious state that didn’t seem like such a bad thing. In fact, it seemed . . . sort of . . . nice . But she had to go and mess it up before she even had a chance to enjoy it. If she even could enjoy it. Would she ever be normal?
    Even worse, she’d made him feel guilty about it. The poor guy tries to keep you warm and you scream at him . . . literally. There’s a way to make a lasting impression.
    “Em? Talk to me.”
    “I’m fine. I’m okay.” Not exactly the truth. She’d probably never really be okay.
    “I’m so sorry I scared you. I just wanted to hold you. I wasn’t thinking. I know you don’t like to be touched and—”
    “No. It’s okay.”
    Jay watched her face closely for a moment. “Is it?”
    Was it? Could it be?
    Hope flashed in his eyes and the last thing she wanted to do was crush it, but she wouldn’t lie to him or herself. She gave him the only honest answer she could. “I don’t know. But I want it to be.”
    “We could try. I promise not to sneak up on ya this time.” Jay lips quirked into a slight grin that eased some of her tension.
    Slowly, he inched back toward her makeshift bed. Oh, God. Okay. She could do this. Heart kicking back into overdrive—but for an entirely different reason now—she shifted cautiously back onto the pile of papers.
    Jay was already stretched out on them. He’d removed all but his undershirt and sweats to sleep in and she got a better view of his body than she’d ever had before, hidden under all of those layers. He was thin—like anyone living out of dumpsters would be—but he still managed to look . . . sturdy.
    Muscles flexed in his bare arms as he pillowed his hands behind his head and stared up at her. Those eyes. They were so dark they looked nearly black in the dimly lit room. His hard jaw added to the whole powerful aura he gave off. Square and rough with dark day old fuzz, her fingers itched to touch it. Just like his hair, the way it flowed around his face and down to his collar. The way it flopped into his eyes. She had to fight the urge to brush it away.
    He waited patiently as she worked up the nerve to move forward. This was Jay. It wasn’t him . She could do this. She wanted to do this. Very slowly, she lowered herself down beside him and for a few minutes they just stayed like that—side by side, barely touching. Barely breathing . Then Jay sighed.
    “I’m going to move, okay? Get us a little more comfortable? If you don’t like it, just tell me to stop.”
    He waited for her answer before doing anything.
    “Okay.”
    Em’s heart pounded as Jay’s arm weaseled its way underneath her. Using it to tilt her body, he rolled her until she was facing him with her head on his shoulder. When her breath faltered, he froze.
    Jay filled her world. The up-close and personal view, his scent which smelled vaguely of mint and cold wind and something uniquely Jay, the feel of his chest rising and falling beneath her. It was all so painfully familiar and yet . . . completely different.
    This wasn’t the same at all. He