sure about that. You bet you did.”
“I hadn’t meant this to be a contest, Dominic, but you’re provokin’ the subject. You said some pretty awful things to me, you know, which I’m not holdin’ against you.”
“I think that’s very generous of you, Catherine.”
“I know you’re bein’ sarcastic, but I’m gonna overlook it. Now, Dominic, I’ve got to come home and get the children ready for school and I fervently pray that by the time we come back, you can forget our differences, so that we can have harmony once again. Will you do that … Dominic, darlin’?”
There was a peculiar sound I took to mean as a laugh, but I wasn’t sure, then Dominic answered, “Fine … sure … okay. I guess that’s about all then, right?”
“Well, only for one more thing … I’ll call you before I leave so as you and Dom can meet us at the airport.”
“Fine.”
“I hope you mean that.”
“What?”
“That everythin’s fine.”
“Oh … yes, of course. Well, I guess that’s it, then.”
“One thing, Dominic, Gina Maria wants to say somethin’.”
I handed the phone to my only daughter and stood there with tears of relief in my eyes as I heard her say in that sweet voice, “Buona Sera, Papa, I miss you.”
I could almost feel Dominic swallow the lump in his throat and see him wipe the tear from his eye as he answered across that long span of distance, “Grazie, mia cara. I miss you more than you know. I’m so happy you’re coming home.”
“Me, too, Papa. Arrivederci.”
“Arrivederci, Gina Maria… arrivederci.”
Oh, God, Catherine sighed, there was so much to remember. What are we but our memories and bein’ alone as I am now leaves me with nothin’ to do but think and thinkin’ at this time is a most distressin’ thing. I’ve simply got to get some rest, but I can’t seem to turn it off. As she got up and walked wearily to the bed and lay down, she thought, the years are like yesterday, so vivid, like mental portraits hangin’ on a wall. All the light and shadows of the past indelibly painted in the recesses of her mind. Something that happened ten years ago crept into her consciousness like a foe that would not leave her at peace. Before dropping off to sleep, her last thought was about Dominic. Did he remember what he had done to humiliate her ten years ago, which was an unforgivable thing she had never ever been able to forget. Did he remember … did he … ever … re … mem … ber …
There were times Dominic did remember, and those times were as bittersweet for him as Catherine’s were angry and hostile. Of course he remembered, how could he ever forget when Catherine had gone off and left him that year taking the children with her and leaving him completely alone, drained emotionally, with plenty of time on his hands to do his own thinking in the wee small hours of the morning. His thoughts were bitter and the whole of their lives made him feel trapped. Here he was, forty-three, married twenty years and seven children later with nothing left but a marriage on the rocks. Had the fault been his? Had he really failed Catherine? Be honest, Dominic. Were you an understanding husband? Did you do all you could to make your marriage work? Because what marriage requires is hard work, constantly. It’s a continual reaffirmation time and time again. Marriage is not a one-shot thing. Think hard, search your conscience … did you?
Maybe, Dominic thought, we plead our own cases in our own behalf and delude ourselves because we have to preserve our own image, our own self-esteem, that precious little corner of our egos. Maybe it’s totally impossible to see and evaluate ourselves as we really are or how we appear to other people. That being the case, he tried with all his integrity to step over the hurdle of self-deception and come face to face with the past. To begin with, he had married young, married a girl whom he knew for a very short while and although he thought he was
“I hadn’t meant this to be a contest, Dominic, but you’re provokin’ the subject. You said some pretty awful things to me, you know, which I’m not holdin’ against you.”
“I think that’s very generous of you, Catherine.”
“I know you’re bein’ sarcastic, but I’m gonna overlook it. Now, Dominic, I’ve got to come home and get the children ready for school and I fervently pray that by the time we come back, you can forget our differences, so that we can have harmony once again. Will you do that … Dominic, darlin’?”
There was a peculiar sound I took to mean as a laugh, but I wasn’t sure, then Dominic answered, “Fine … sure … okay. I guess that’s about all then, right?”
“Well, only for one more thing … I’ll call you before I leave so as you and Dom can meet us at the airport.”
“Fine.”
“I hope you mean that.”
“What?”
“That everythin’s fine.”
“Oh … yes, of course. Well, I guess that’s it, then.”
“One thing, Dominic, Gina Maria wants to say somethin’.”
I handed the phone to my only daughter and stood there with tears of relief in my eyes as I heard her say in that sweet voice, “Buona Sera, Papa, I miss you.”
I could almost feel Dominic swallow the lump in his throat and see him wipe the tear from his eye as he answered across that long span of distance, “Grazie, mia cara. I miss you more than you know. I’m so happy you’re coming home.”
“Me, too, Papa. Arrivederci.”
“Arrivederci, Gina Maria… arrivederci.”
Oh, God, Catherine sighed, there was so much to remember. What are we but our memories and bein’ alone as I am now leaves me with nothin’ to do but think and thinkin’ at this time is a most distressin’ thing. I’ve simply got to get some rest, but I can’t seem to turn it off. As she got up and walked wearily to the bed and lay down, she thought, the years are like yesterday, so vivid, like mental portraits hangin’ on a wall. All the light and shadows of the past indelibly painted in the recesses of her mind. Something that happened ten years ago crept into her consciousness like a foe that would not leave her at peace. Before dropping off to sleep, her last thought was about Dominic. Did he remember what he had done to humiliate her ten years ago, which was an unforgivable thing she had never ever been able to forget. Did he remember … did he … ever … re … mem … ber …
There were times Dominic did remember, and those times were as bittersweet for him as Catherine’s were angry and hostile. Of course he remembered, how could he ever forget when Catherine had gone off and left him that year taking the children with her and leaving him completely alone, drained emotionally, with plenty of time on his hands to do his own thinking in the wee small hours of the morning. His thoughts were bitter and the whole of their lives made him feel trapped. Here he was, forty-three, married twenty years and seven children later with nothing left but a marriage on the rocks. Had the fault been his? Had he really failed Catherine? Be honest, Dominic. Were you an understanding husband? Did you do all you could to make your marriage work? Because what marriage requires is hard work, constantly. It’s a continual reaffirmation time and time again. Marriage is not a one-shot thing. Think hard, search your conscience … did you?
Maybe, Dominic thought, we plead our own cases in our own behalf and delude ourselves because we have to preserve our own image, our own self-esteem, that precious little corner of our egos. Maybe it’s totally impossible to see and evaluate ourselves as we really are or how we appear to other people. That being the case, he tried with all his integrity to step over the hurdle of self-deception and come face to face with the past. To begin with, he had married young, married a girl whom he knew for a very short while and although he thought he was
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