Enemy Inside (Defectors Trilogy) by Tarah Benner

against me as the knife entered his heart.  
    “Help!” I cried, but Amory didn’t even glance in my direction. I could feel the carrier’s warm blood pouring down my sides, and the smell of him was almost enough to knock me out. The carrier shook, gasping and thrashing on top of me. Horror and dread seeped into my stomach like poison. Amory was going to leave me under this dying carrier. He was so heavy. I couldn’t get out from under him.
    The carrier’s death was not as swift as it should have been. I watched with a detached horror as Amory stabbed another carrier and then another. They kept getting closer, growing in number, but he never seemed to tire. Bodies of the dead and dying piled up around him, but he did not stop or glance in my direction.  
    The expression on his face was one that I had never seen: cold, ruthless, and vacant. He was a killing machine. He never paused in horror or remorse as one of the carrier’s tears ran with the bloody slash across her cheek. Her dying cry was so hauntingly human that I felt myself shaking with dry sobs.
    The carrier on top of me was still breathing his last gurgling breaths. Warm blood trickled down my neck and the collar of my shirt. Finally, with a painful quiver, he stopped.
    The hallway fell quiet. No more carriers emerged from the apartment. All the bloody bodies on the ground were silent.  
    The only thing I could hear was the sound of Amory’s labored panting. Covered in blood and shaking with fatigue, he looked positively insane. His eyes were still cold — sharp and silver like a predator’s. I laid my cheek against the filthy carpet, breathing in the stale smoke, mold, and blood. I wanted to die.
    A small gasp made me look up. Amory was still standing there, but he looked wild, suddenly afraid.  
    Covered in blood, his shirt ripped, he jerked his head from side to side, taking in the dead all around. He gasped again, turning to scan for a nonexistent threat. Then he looked lost.
    “Haven?”
    The sound of my own name made me stir.
    “Haven!” He was glancing around wildly. He couldn’t see me, and he didn’t remember where I was. Or he didn’t know . . .
    I breathed in heavily, trying to summon my voice.  
    “I’m here,” I said. Those two small words took so much energy.
    His head jerked around, eyes locking in on me.  
    “Oh my god!” He rushed forward, reaching me in three strides.  
    His eyes were no longer insane; they were swimming with confusion, fear, and shame. In one try, Amory heaved the massive carrier’s dead body off me. My lungs expanded instantly as the weight disappeared, and I choked in air.
    “Oh god!” Amory muttered. He flipped me over as easily as if I were a rag doll. His eyes raked my face and body, checking for injuries. He shook his head in disbelief. “What happened?”
    I couldn’t speak. I didn’t want to say what had happened. He had turned into an exterminator. He had no humanity — no thoughts other than killing.
    Amory scooped me into his arms, but I was shaking all over. Without meaning to, I cringed. A hurt look crossed his face, but he pushed it down. I didn’t want to admit it, but I was afraid of him.
    He got up, holding me against his chest, and walked back to our apartment. Looking worried, Amory sat me down at the table. He looked as though he wanted to say something, but instead, he just backed silently out of the room to go dispose of the carriers.
    I sat there for a long time, staring at the faded flowery wallpaper. Something was amiss with the coziness of the room and the stench of death that hung over everything. I realized it was me. The carrier’s blood and body odor had leeched into my clothes and skin. The dried blood was beginning to flake around my neck and chest. My shirt was stiff with it.
    Finally, I got up and went to the bathroom. I peeled off the ruined shirt and pants and stepped into the shower. The hot water pounded against my skin, and I watched the blood mix with the