Edgar Allan's Official Crime Investigation Notebook by Mary Amato

movies, Kip. This is live theater!
Shh!
”
    As narrator, Destiny was the first to speak. “Presenting ‘The Tale of Glurpy’ by Edgar Allan, Taz Raskel, and Destiny Perkins.”
    Edgar added, “All characters are fictional. Any resemblance to any person is coincidental.”
    Taz stuck his hands out like fins, and Edgar hid behind the door.
    NARRATOR (DESTINY) :
    One dark and dreary morning long ago
    A happy goldfish swam inside his home.
    GLURPY ( TAZ , flapping his hands and using a fishy voice):
    How I do love to flap my little fins
    For when I race against myself I win!
    Taz ran around in a circle, flapping his hands and making fish faces, and then he pretended to win.
    NARRATOR :
    Next to the fishie lived a crazy dude
    Who’d rather read and write than eat his food.
    All day he read and wrote poems with such glee.
    He wished the world loved poems as much as he.
    CRAZY DUDE ( EDGAR , rubbing his hands):
    I have a plan that is so cleverish
    I’m going to sneak into this room and steal the fish!
    In place of Glurpy I will leave a poem
    And then I’ll take the stolen goldie home.
    My students then will find the poem and read it
    and think that poetry is great. Nothing can beat it!
    Edgar tiptoed across the room and taped a note to the board. Then he grabbed Taz by the arm. Taz yelped and flapped his fins.
    GLURPY :
    Put me back, you crazy dude! Right now!
    CRAZY DUDE :
    I didn’t know that fish could talk back!
    Wow!
    NARRATOR :
    Soon many students read the poem he left.
    They loved it. “Poems are worth a little theft.”
    From that day on, they read poems old and new.
    The thief was glad. His name
    was…Mr….
    Destiny paused for effect.
    â€œMr. Crew!?” Maia exclaimed.
    â€œMr. Crew?” Patrick echoed.
    Destiny said her last line. “The thief was glad. His name was Mr. Drew. The end.”
    â€œWell. Well. Well.” Mr. Crew stood up. “What a fascinating play about a fish named Glurpy and a fascinating ‘crazy dude’ named Mr. Drew.”
    The class grew very quiet.
    Edgar’s heart began to pound. Mr. Crew’s eyeballs were looking right at him, and they looked guilty!
    â€œWhere did you get your inspiration for this play?” their teacher asked.
    Edgar glanced at Destiny and Taz. They both nodded their heads as if to say Go for it. He cleared his throat. “Before I answer that, may I ask you a few questions, Mr. Crew?”
    â€œGo right ahead, Edgar.” Mr. Crew sat on the edge of his desk.
    Edgar began to pace back and forth at the front of the room. “You don’t like coffee, do you, Mr. Crew?”
    â€œNo I don’t.”
    Edgar pointed to Mr. Crew’s electric teapot. “You make tea right here in your room, don’t you?”
    â€œYes I do.”
    Patrick interrupted. “I don’t see what this has—”
    Taz held up his hand. “Let Edgar finish.”
    â€œThank you, Taz,” Edgar said. He turned his attention back to Mr. Crew and picked up his teacup. “You made a cup this morning, didn’t you?”
    â€œYes I did.”
    â€œAt about what time?”
    â€œAt about 9:00 o’clock.”
    Edgar lifted the teabag out of the trash can. “Hmmm. I see it’s ‘Tennyson Tea.’ Isn’t that your favorite brand?”
    â€œYes it is. It’s delicious.”
    â€œBut you ran out of Tennyson Tea last Friday, didn’t you, Mr. Crew?”
    â€œYes I did.”
    â€œDid you purchase tea over the weekend?”
    â€œWell . . . no I didn’t.”
    â€œI see. Then where did you get this tea?”
    Mr. Crew smiled.
    â€œYou stole the tea from Ms. Herschel’s room, didn’t you, Mr. Crew?”
    Patrick huffed. “Why would he steal his own gift?”
    Edgar ignored him. “You stole the goldfish and the iris and the fan and the tea, didn’t you, Mr. Crew?”
    A buzz of excitement went