captures mine. There’s such a vulnerability in his eyes that I’m struck speechless. Once I realize I’m waiting for him to say something, though, I force some air back into my lungs and get over it quick.
“Straight up, no bullshit: Did you like kissing me?”
My heart hammers in my chest as I wait for his answer. I can practically hear the blood whooshing in my ears, drowning out everything else.
“Come on, man. I’m pretty sure you felt the answer to that.”
I laugh, and a little of the tension eases out of me before coiling right back up like a spring. “I know your dick liked it. Did you like it?”
He takes a minute to answer, looking everywhere but straight at me. I forget how to breathe, and my chest starts to burn. This is going to kill me. I’m going to be wheeled out of his dorm on a gurney, brought in DOA to the nearest hospital. Cause of death: Wanting a straight guy.
“I don’t know, Derek. I think so.”
I let out a breath and try to tamp down my excitement. ‘I think so’ isn’t really an enthusiastic ‘yeah, man, let’s totally fuck.’ But it’s better than flat-out denial.
“But how’s that even possible? I haven’t been faking it with girls.”
Nothing against Hawk’s old girlfriends, but I so don’t want to hear this.
“It’s called being bi, dude. Playing for both teams.”
I’m not surprised he thinks it’s all or nothing. Most gay guys I know think that, so I figure it’s the same for straight guys, too.
“Shit.” He leans back in his chair, and I watch as he stretches his arms over his head. His muscles flex, and I feel a familiar warmth in the pit of my stomach. “So… What now?”
Now you get rid of your clothes and let me lick every single inch of that body , I think, and my dick twitches in agreement.
I almost wish I had the balls to say it.
“That’s up to you. If you want somebody to… practice on. You know, just to make sure you really feel that way. I could probably help.”
Jesus. Because that’s so much better? I can’t believe I just said that.
He leans forward on the edge of the bed, clasps his hands together, fidgets a little. Then he seems to realize what I said, because he looks up at me and a slow grin spreads across his lips. “Probably?”
I couldn’t bite back the smile even if I tried. “Yeah. I guess I could work something out. Have to check my schedule.”
He laughs, shaking his head, and the sound is like music to my ears. “You’re a dick.”
“Yep.”
As I listen to him, I can feel the tension flow out of the room. I feel like I’m sitting with my friend again, instead of someone I can’t figure out. But when he looks at me, those blue eyes practically twinkling with amusement, a whole different kind of tension passes between us.
Swallowing hard, I stand up from my chair and cross the short distance between us. I stand in front of him, and my stomach is already doing flips, my nerves wrecked as I think about what’s coming next. One kiss is no big deal. We could probably get past that and write it off as a fluke. But kissing in his room? On his bed?
Things are going to change between us, and maybe not for the better. But I still can’t keep myself from sitting beside him.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
- Jason -
When I feel Griff’s weight push down into the bed, I know things are about to change. It’s like staring up at the sky right before a storm comes through.
“Looks like my schedule’s pretty clear now,” he says, and his voice has a roughness to it that blazes a trail of anticipation straight through me.
I see Griff’s adam’s apple bob as he swallows, and feel a weird burst of nerves flutter through me. It’s like I’m a teenager again. Sitting alone with someone in my room. Wanting to kiss them, knowing they want it, too, but scared to fuck it up. Everything in my life has always had to be perfect, and I feel like my previous experience isn’t really going to count for much here.
My gaze moves
“Straight up, no bullshit: Did you like kissing me?”
My heart hammers in my chest as I wait for his answer. I can practically hear the blood whooshing in my ears, drowning out everything else.
“Come on, man. I’m pretty sure you felt the answer to that.”
I laugh, and a little of the tension eases out of me before coiling right back up like a spring. “I know your dick liked it. Did you like it?”
He takes a minute to answer, looking everywhere but straight at me. I forget how to breathe, and my chest starts to burn. This is going to kill me. I’m going to be wheeled out of his dorm on a gurney, brought in DOA to the nearest hospital. Cause of death: Wanting a straight guy.
“I don’t know, Derek. I think so.”
I let out a breath and try to tamp down my excitement. ‘I think so’ isn’t really an enthusiastic ‘yeah, man, let’s totally fuck.’ But it’s better than flat-out denial.
“But how’s that even possible? I haven’t been faking it with girls.”
Nothing against Hawk’s old girlfriends, but I so don’t want to hear this.
“It’s called being bi, dude. Playing for both teams.”
I’m not surprised he thinks it’s all or nothing. Most gay guys I know think that, so I figure it’s the same for straight guys, too.
“Shit.” He leans back in his chair, and I watch as he stretches his arms over his head. His muscles flex, and I feel a familiar warmth in the pit of my stomach. “So… What now?”
Now you get rid of your clothes and let me lick every single inch of that body , I think, and my dick twitches in agreement.
I almost wish I had the balls to say it.
“That’s up to you. If you want somebody to… practice on. You know, just to make sure you really feel that way. I could probably help.”
Jesus. Because that’s so much better? I can’t believe I just said that.
He leans forward on the edge of the bed, clasps his hands together, fidgets a little. Then he seems to realize what I said, because he looks up at me and a slow grin spreads across his lips. “Probably?”
I couldn’t bite back the smile even if I tried. “Yeah. I guess I could work something out. Have to check my schedule.”
He laughs, shaking his head, and the sound is like music to my ears. “You’re a dick.”
“Yep.”
As I listen to him, I can feel the tension flow out of the room. I feel like I’m sitting with my friend again, instead of someone I can’t figure out. But when he looks at me, those blue eyes practically twinkling with amusement, a whole different kind of tension passes between us.
Swallowing hard, I stand up from my chair and cross the short distance between us. I stand in front of him, and my stomach is already doing flips, my nerves wrecked as I think about what’s coming next. One kiss is no big deal. We could probably get past that and write it off as a fluke. But kissing in his room? On his bed?
Things are going to change between us, and maybe not for the better. But I still can’t keep myself from sitting beside him.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
- Jason -
When I feel Griff’s weight push down into the bed, I know things are about to change. It’s like staring up at the sky right before a storm comes through.
“Looks like my schedule’s pretty clear now,” he says, and his voice has a roughness to it that blazes a trail of anticipation straight through me.
I see Griff’s adam’s apple bob as he swallows, and feel a weird burst of nerves flutter through me. It’s like I’m a teenager again. Sitting alone with someone in my room. Wanting to kiss them, knowing they want it, too, but scared to fuck it up. Everything in my life has always had to be perfect, and I feel like my previous experience isn’t really going to count for much here.
My gaze moves
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