e by Matt Beaumont

this is appreciated, but the scanties in your drawer are mine. Pop them in a brown bag and hand them over when we have a beer. When are you free? Tonight? Can’t wait, pal.
Nigel Godley – 1/6/00, 12:54pm
to:
Liam O’Keefe
cc:
 
re:
Victoria’s Secret
    I’ve put them in the internal post. Sorry, but can’t go for that drink now. The end-of-year reports are in hand. April may seem an age away, but in terms of workload versus time given, I’m snowed under. When they’re finished I’m off on hols. In Jun/Jul we’re switching to a new payroll system. Then, Aug/Sept are always busy and before you know it, Christmas will be upon us and you know what Christmas is like. Oh well, never mind. Got to go now, invoices don’t reconcile themselves, you know. – Nige.
Shanice Duff – 1/6/00, 12:57pm
to:
Rachel Stevenson
cc:
 
re:
p spaces
    Rachel, thank heaven Ken is back tomorrow. Maybe now we can all get back to normal. He told me to tell you he’d take the parking space normally reserved for Dan Westbrooke – Ken didn’t think he’d mind.
Susi Judge-Davis – 1/6/00, 12:59pm
to:
Simon Horne
cc:
 
re:
lunchy-poos . . .
    . . . and your cab’s here. Give Letitia a big Teletubby hug from me . . . Sx
Susi Judge-Davis – 1/6/00, 1:00pm
to:
Zoë Clarke
cc:
 
re:
lunch
    It’s time for our talk.
James Gregory – 1/6/00, 1:02pm
to:
Daniel Westbrooke
cc:
 
re:
Kimbelle
    Just got off the phone to client. I really think we should talk.
Daniel Westbrooke – 1/6/00, 1:03pm
to:
James Gregory
cc:
 
re:
Kimbelle
    James, I have a company to run. This will have to wait. Put some time in my diary for tomorrow afternoon.
Daniel Westbrooke – 1/6/00, 1:06pm
to:
Rachel Stevenson
cc:
 
re:
Ken Perry
    Rachel, I have had Ken’s Shanice wittering on the phone. She tells me that you have authorised him to have my parking space and that I am to have one by the rubbish skips. You do realise that this current space is mine by virtue of seniority? I am sure that there has been some mistake. Please confirm.
Zoë Clarke – 1/6/00, 1:07pm
to:
Susi Judge-Davis
cc:
 
re:
lunch
    Sorry, can’t do it now. Going for full wax, then need to buy something black – remember I told you it’s my next door neighbour’s funeral tomorrow and I won’t be here. And since I start with David on Monday, there’s not much point in chatting, is there? See ya!!!!!!
David Crutton – 1/6/00, 1:08pm
to:
Chandra Kapoor
cc:
Rachel Stevenson
re:
balls on the line
    I am about to go to lunch. If I return to find another unsolicited e-mail from Pertti van Helden, Yogi Bear, Deputy Dawg or any other fuck-head masquerading as a lynchpin of the Miller Shanks network, you will find my patience has snapped once and for all.
Susi Judge-Davis – 1/6/00, 1:11pm
to:
Rachel Stevenson
cc:
 
re:
Zoë Clarke
    I have had enough of her. She is lazy, rude and incompetent. If you want my opinion, she is quite unsuitable for the most senior secretarial job in the agency.
[email protected] 1/6/00, 1:13pm (3:13pm local)
to:
david_crutton@millershanks–london.co.uk
cc:
 
re:
balls on the line
    To be mentioned in the same breathings as Deputy Dawg and Yogi Bear is an honour of which I feel most unworthy of deserving.
    You are a true friend – Pertti.
Rachel Stevenson – 1/6/00, 1:16pm
to:
Susi Judge-Davis
cc:
 
re:
Zoë Clarke
    Seems I got your opinion whether I wanted it or not. You had better see me.
Chandra Kapoor – 1/6/00, 1:18pm
to:
All Departments
cc:
 
re:
e-mail
    We need to carry out urgent maintenance on Lotus Notes and the server will shut down for approximately two hours. This will takeplace at 1:30 today, so everyone should log off the system before then. We apologise for the inconvenience, but once we are up and running again we will have seen the last of e-mails that end up in the wrong hands.
    Chandra Kapoor
    Head of IT
Brett Topowlski – 1/6/00, 1:29pm
to:
Liam O’Keefe
cc:
 
re:
bloody ada
    Just back from doc’s. Can’t