better.
“Don’t worry about it,” I said and shifted away from Danni a little bit. She sat down next to me, our legs brushing against each other’s. The bed was small, but not that small. I moved a little further towards the end.
“Lucas,” Danni said. I waited for her to say more, but she simply let my name hang in the air. I didn’t know if she was waiting for me to say something or do something. I choose to stare intently at my boots as they left impressions in the carpet.
Danni’s hand touched my shoulder. She gently pulled me towards her. I resisted and tried to inch further down the bed.
“Danni, what are you doing?” I asked, staring at the floor. She was beautiful. She was broken too, but still beautiful. Somehow that combination made her even more attractive. I pulled away. Complicating things further wasn’t going to help anything.
“What’s wrong, Lucas?” Danni asked. Her voice was husky and full of mischief. Her other hand settled on my knee.
“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” I stammered and leapt up from the bed. “Danni, hold on. Look, we shouldn’t…I mean we can’t…”
“Why?” Danni asked. “Jared is downstairs asleep.”
“No, not that,” I said.
“Well, what is it then?” Danni stood up and moved towards me. She wrapped her arms around my waist and pulled me closer. “Is it the masks? I know we have to keep them on. It’ll be kind of kinky.” Her laugh sounded strange through her mask.
“No, it’s not the masks,” I said and gently pushed her away. Was she really trying to seduce me while wearing a biohazard mask? I thought. Were people really into that sort of thing? Apocalyptic foreplay? If they weren’t, I’m sure anyone left would be soon enough.
“Is it your wife?” Danni asked. She sounded hurt, slighted maybe, but not angry. “I thought you said she left you. I thought this would be okay?”
“She did leave me, but I still love her,” I said. “I’m sorry, Danni.”
“I get it,” Danni sighed. Her shoulders sagged and tears welled in her eyes. “It was a stupid idea. I just wanted to feel something…something, I don’t know – normal, I guess. I just didn’t want to feel like the world was over, even for a little bit.”
“She did leave,” I repeated, “but that doesn’t change anything.”
Danni was crying. I felt bad. I didn’t know if it was the stress, my rejection or all of the above. I stood nailed to a spot on the floor.
“I wish I had met someone like you before all of this,” Danni said. I studied her face. Was she still trying to seduce me? “Your wife was lucky to have you. I screwed up Jared’s life so many times by hooking up with the wrong guy. I always seemed to meet the wrong one.”
“Yeah, well there’s a hell of a lot more of them. Stats just weren’t on your side,” I said. “Come on, let’s go get some breakfast.” Danni nodded.
It was easy to write Danni off as a weak female, desperate to latch onto a man, but that wasn’t what was going on here. Danni was scared. I was too. She wanted to feel a respite from the ash-choked insanity that threatened to consume us both. Oddly enough, a recently paroled criminal with a doomsday bunker in his basement was the most normal person in Danni’s life and all she was trying to do was feel something other than scared. I couldn’t blame her for that. If not for Lisa and Kara, I would have been doing the same thing.
As I reached over to grab my shotgun, I saw Kara’s cow painting on the floor. It must have slipped from my hands while I was sleeping.
Danni saw that I was staring at the painting, knelt down and picked it up. “You should hold on to this – hold onto them.”
“Thanks,” I said and tucked the painting into my pocket.
-29-
“So when do we leave?” Jared asked. He sat on the edge of his bunk, what should have been Kara’s bunk, with an industrial-sized can of peaches cradled between his knees. I watched him swinging his feet in time
Multiple
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