was tired of pretending she was Barbie.
Rob gone, Jane grabbed the phone and called Tim’s cell. It had been set to voicemail. She left a message. Then another. And finally a third that was much less chatty and hyper-cheery than her first two had been—and more real. “Please call me back. I know I hurt your feelings. Again. We need to talk.” She listened to the empty air for a few seconds after she pressed end.
18
Jane walked with Tim to the dark corner of the parking lot where their cars waited, totally alone, the last of the stragglers from youth group long gone.
She shook her key fob at him, and he smiled grudgingly at the tinny-tinkling sound. “Yes, for the billionth time, it’s fantastic you’re driving again. And it’s even more excellent that you’re back to work. Congratulations.”
“It’s just light duty for now,” Jane said but couldn’t keep excitement from her voice.
“It’s sure getting cold, hey?” Tim moved further away from Jane, fists shoved in his pockets, looking up at the sky.
Jane studied his posture for a moment and then followed his gaze, taking in the expanse of navy shadows. Here and there, pinpricks of bright silvery light popped out, breaking the darkness.
“The stars are coming out right before our eyes,” she said.
“Don’t do that,” he said.
“Don’t do what?”
Tim sighed. “Be all cute and whimsical.”
“I’m not. I promise. I’m definitely being all grouchy and stoic.”
Tim laughed, but it wasn’t his normal belly laugh. It was a dry, almost sad, sound.
Jane shivered.
“Yeah, really getting cold,” he reiterated.
“Thanks for calling me back,” she said.
“Of course.”
“Why did it take so long?”
Tim wrapped his arms across his chest and buried his hands in his armpits. “I wanted to think about what I wanted to say.”
“That’s weird. I thought I was the one with specific things that needed to be said.”
“Maybe we both do, but please hear me out.”
“OK—but we have to walk. All this standing around is making me mental.” Jane took three steps before Tim joined her, and it wasn’t until they crossed the street and found a sidewalk that he spoke again. “You’re really special, Jane.”
“I know…but I’m safe when medicated. I promise.”
“I’m not joking.” He almost sounded irritated.
She’d never heard him sound that way.
“And I know from all your jokes every time it comes up, you don’t see me the way I see you.”
Tim had been right. The temperature really was falling. The black sidewalk glimmered in places where moisture was freezing, creating shiny, slippery spots. And she was wearing stupid shoes—pointy-toed flats without good tread. As if cued, she started to slip. Before she even put her good hand out to try and regain her balance, Tim caught her. She rested her head against his chest, breathing hard. She could hear his heartbeat. For a moment, time stopped.
“Jane,” he whispered against her hair. “Being just friends, watching you date idiots, it’s killing me.”
She pulled back gently.
Tim’s brown eyes were honey-gold in the yellow beam from the overhead streetlight.
“Oh, yeah?” She placed her hand on his chest, the same spot where she’d listened to his heart. “And what can we do about that?” She’d intended the words to be light and coy.
Tim looked away from her and scrubbed a hand over his chin. “You’re not ready yet. I get it.”
“I don’t know if you do, Tim.” Jane flashed her biggest smile. “I’m flirting with you—”
“I know. You’re always flirting—with me, with some other guy…with someone. And don’t get me wrong, I see your charm. You have a super cute way about you.”
“Super cute” from his mouth didn’t sound like a compliment. A burning lump formed at the back of Jane’s throat, making her voice craggy. “But?”
“But I don’t want to be just one more guy you flirt
Rob gone, Jane grabbed the phone and called Tim’s cell. It had been set to voicemail. She left a message. Then another. And finally a third that was much less chatty and hyper-cheery than her first two had been—and more real. “Please call me back. I know I hurt your feelings. Again. We need to talk.” She listened to the empty air for a few seconds after she pressed end.
18
Jane walked with Tim to the dark corner of the parking lot where their cars waited, totally alone, the last of the stragglers from youth group long gone.
She shook her key fob at him, and he smiled grudgingly at the tinny-tinkling sound. “Yes, for the billionth time, it’s fantastic you’re driving again. And it’s even more excellent that you’re back to work. Congratulations.”
“It’s just light duty for now,” Jane said but couldn’t keep excitement from her voice.
“It’s sure getting cold, hey?” Tim moved further away from Jane, fists shoved in his pockets, looking up at the sky.
Jane studied his posture for a moment and then followed his gaze, taking in the expanse of navy shadows. Here and there, pinpricks of bright silvery light popped out, breaking the darkness.
“The stars are coming out right before our eyes,” she said.
“Don’t do that,” he said.
“Don’t do what?”
Tim sighed. “Be all cute and whimsical.”
“I’m not. I promise. I’m definitely being all grouchy and stoic.”
Tim laughed, but it wasn’t his normal belly laugh. It was a dry, almost sad, sound.
Jane shivered.
“Yeah, really getting cold,” he reiterated.
“Thanks for calling me back,” she said.
“Of course.”
“Why did it take so long?”
Tim wrapped his arms across his chest and buried his hands in his armpits. “I wanted to think about what I wanted to say.”
“That’s weird. I thought I was the one with specific things that needed to be said.”
“Maybe we both do, but please hear me out.”
“OK—but we have to walk. All this standing around is making me mental.” Jane took three steps before Tim joined her, and it wasn’t until they crossed the street and found a sidewalk that he spoke again. “You’re really special, Jane.”
“I know…but I’m safe when medicated. I promise.”
“I’m not joking.” He almost sounded irritated.
She’d never heard him sound that way.
“And I know from all your jokes every time it comes up, you don’t see me the way I see you.”
Tim had been right. The temperature really was falling. The black sidewalk glimmered in places where moisture was freezing, creating shiny, slippery spots. And she was wearing stupid shoes—pointy-toed flats without good tread. As if cued, she started to slip. Before she even put her good hand out to try and regain her balance, Tim caught her. She rested her head against his chest, breathing hard. She could hear his heartbeat. For a moment, time stopped.
“Jane,” he whispered against her hair. “Being just friends, watching you date idiots, it’s killing me.”
She pulled back gently.
Tim’s brown eyes were honey-gold in the yellow beam from the overhead streetlight.
“Oh, yeah?” She placed her hand on his chest, the same spot where she’d listened to his heart. “And what can we do about that?” She’d intended the words to be light and coy.
Tim looked away from her and scrubbed a hand over his chin. “You’re not ready yet. I get it.”
“I don’t know if you do, Tim.” Jane flashed her biggest smile. “I’m flirting with you—”
“I know. You’re always flirting—with me, with some other guy…with someone. And don’t get me wrong, I see your charm. You have a super cute way about you.”
“Super cute” from his mouth didn’t sound like a compliment. A burning lump formed at the back of Jane’s throat, making her voice craggy. “But?”
“But I don’t want to be just one more guy you flirt
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