attention while I had it. Jools and I perched at the counter inside, while he sweet-talked the chef into cooking for us, fixed us tall glasses of iced coffee, and found us some chocolate chip cookies to nibble while we waited.
It was only as we left, laden with hot food, that I realized we hadn’t swapped names.
****
The insistent buzzing of my phone dragged me out of my memories, and back to the new Alun-less reality. With a huge measure of reluctance, I answered.
It was Luce, and from the slurring in her voice, she was very drunk. “Why didn’t you stay, Livvy?”
I fumbled for the right words, and tripped over them. “I couldn’t face it.” Like a wounded animal, I’d sought refuge in a safe place. “I’m sorry.”
“He loved you so much, Livvy. So much.” I heard a muffled sob, and my heart ached even more. “You were his Mate and he was lucky to find you.” The raw grief in her voice threatened what remained of my composure.
“His soulmate, you mean? I always thought that.”
“His what ?” Luce paused, and then muttered something under her breath.
“Sorry, didn’t quite catch that.”
“Oh, shit. You didn’t know.” The words rattled out of her, rapid and shaky. “I thought… Fuck. Forget I said that. His soulmate, yeah.”
“What did you mean, Luce?”
I heard a muffled rustling sound, and then Tom spoke. “Hey. Don’t pay any attention to Luce. She’s talking rubbish. I’m taking her home now.” His tone softened. “Don’t be a stranger, Livvy. Come back and see us soon.”
I made a non-committal noise, and hung up to stare blankly at the ceiling again. Luce was a lawyer. Being clear on details could have been her mantra, so what had she been talking about? What didn’t I know about Alun that maybe he should have told me?
Chapter Three
I lay on my side in bed, facing Alun, knees bent, our hands linked between us. He was cooking up some mischief, I was sure. The devilish glint in his eyes was usually a precursor to some wild idea. Driving twenty miles in the darkness of very early morning to watch the sun rising from a particular hill top. Throwing clothes and toiletries into a backpack for an impromptu weekend hike. Kite flying on a windy beach.
I’d never been so impulsive before I met him, or as bold.
He squeezed my fingers. Here we go. “You are going to marry me, aren’t you, Olivia Tanner?”
He asked me every time we got together, and I couldn’t help giggling. “You know I am, but not yet. We graduate first, figure out where we’re going to live, and then we get married.” I rubbed my knees against his, and watched a smile spread across his face. “What’s the rush?”
“You’re my Mate, Cariad .” The Welsh endearment sounded beautiful the way it rolled from his tongue. “I’m impatient to share my life with you.”
I blinked, and he was gone. My heart skittered, and I took a rapid breath . Had I been asleep?
Cautious, I stretched out one hand to where he’d been lying. The sheets were cold. He’d looked real. Felt as alive as he always had. You’re my Mate. I’d never heard him call me that before.
I buried my face in the pillow, and clung to it with both hands. The conversation with Luce must have been playing on my mind. I’d have to call her later. Fears assaulted me. What was I going to do without him? How would I fill my days? He was meshed into my life so tightly. I couldn’t just untangle him and move on, even if I wanted to.
For the first time in my adult life, I had no direction, and it terrified me. Everything had been planned out—with Alun. He didn’t want to live too far from Wales, and so we’d been looking at Bristol for jobs. I had another interview lined up next week—or was it this week? I’d have to reschedule. I was in no fit state to sit an interview.
****
A week later, I perched on a hard chair in my doctor’s examining room. “I can’t sleep.” I stared at the sunshine pouring through
It was only as we left, laden with hot food, that I realized we hadn’t swapped names.
****
The insistent buzzing of my phone dragged me out of my memories, and back to the new Alun-less reality. With a huge measure of reluctance, I answered.
It was Luce, and from the slurring in her voice, she was very drunk. “Why didn’t you stay, Livvy?”
I fumbled for the right words, and tripped over them. “I couldn’t face it.” Like a wounded animal, I’d sought refuge in a safe place. “I’m sorry.”
“He loved you so much, Livvy. So much.” I heard a muffled sob, and my heart ached even more. “You were his Mate and he was lucky to find you.” The raw grief in her voice threatened what remained of my composure.
“His soulmate, you mean? I always thought that.”
“His what ?” Luce paused, and then muttered something under her breath.
“Sorry, didn’t quite catch that.”
“Oh, shit. You didn’t know.” The words rattled out of her, rapid and shaky. “I thought… Fuck. Forget I said that. His soulmate, yeah.”
“What did you mean, Luce?”
I heard a muffled rustling sound, and then Tom spoke. “Hey. Don’t pay any attention to Luce. She’s talking rubbish. I’m taking her home now.” His tone softened. “Don’t be a stranger, Livvy. Come back and see us soon.”
I made a non-committal noise, and hung up to stare blankly at the ceiling again. Luce was a lawyer. Being clear on details could have been her mantra, so what had she been talking about? What didn’t I know about Alun that maybe he should have told me?
Chapter Three
I lay on my side in bed, facing Alun, knees bent, our hands linked between us. He was cooking up some mischief, I was sure. The devilish glint in his eyes was usually a precursor to some wild idea. Driving twenty miles in the darkness of very early morning to watch the sun rising from a particular hill top. Throwing clothes and toiletries into a backpack for an impromptu weekend hike. Kite flying on a windy beach.
I’d never been so impulsive before I met him, or as bold.
He squeezed my fingers. Here we go. “You are going to marry me, aren’t you, Olivia Tanner?”
He asked me every time we got together, and I couldn’t help giggling. “You know I am, but not yet. We graduate first, figure out where we’re going to live, and then we get married.” I rubbed my knees against his, and watched a smile spread across his face. “What’s the rush?”
“You’re my Mate, Cariad .” The Welsh endearment sounded beautiful the way it rolled from his tongue. “I’m impatient to share my life with you.”
I blinked, and he was gone. My heart skittered, and I took a rapid breath . Had I been asleep?
Cautious, I stretched out one hand to where he’d been lying. The sheets were cold. He’d looked real. Felt as alive as he always had. You’re my Mate. I’d never heard him call me that before.
I buried my face in the pillow, and clung to it with both hands. The conversation with Luce must have been playing on my mind. I’d have to call her later. Fears assaulted me. What was I going to do without him? How would I fill my days? He was meshed into my life so tightly. I couldn’t just untangle him and move on, even if I wanted to.
For the first time in my adult life, I had no direction, and it terrified me. Everything had been planned out—with Alun. He didn’t want to live too far from Wales, and so we’d been looking at Bristol for jobs. I had another interview lined up next week—or was it this week? I’d have to reschedule. I was in no fit state to sit an interview.
****
A week later, I perched on a hard chair in my doctor’s examining room. “I can’t sleep.” I stared at the sunshine pouring through
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