actually—because if he’s not staying with me, then he’s staying with his parents, and they don’t like me. But his home is what he’s used to, and he scared me with his too much, too fast, too soon burst of emotion earlier, and I don’t want to push him to do anything he’s not ready to do. So I tell him I don’t mind at all.
As I walk him outside to his truck, we make plans to meet at the guesthouse tomorrow morning. When we hug and kiss good-bye, he sighs with contentment and seems in no hurry to leave me, so I think maybe he’ll change his mind. But no—he climbs into his truck and puts the key in the ignition.
“Good night, Tami.”
“Good night, Ike.”
He must catch the wavering in my voice because he asks, “You all right?”
“I was just wondering, are you going to tell your parents about Haroun?”
He grins. “Is this your scaredy-cat way of asking me not to?”
I can’t help but smile. “I suppose it is.”
“Don’t worry about it,” he says. “Just leave my parents to me.”
We kiss good-bye all over again, and after he drives off, I go back inside to find Ardishir waiting for me on the couch. He pats a spot next to him for me to sit.
“Tami,” he says.
“Ardishir,” I say back playfully.
“Ike’s great,” he says. “He’s an absolutely great guy.”
His words warm my heart. “Thank you.”
“He’s one in a million,” he says. “A true prince among men.”
“He is, isn’t he?”
“But I have an issue.”
I swallow hard. Ardishir so seldom takes issue with anything, and when he does, he’s someone I listen to very seriously.
“Anyone can see he’s crazy about you.” At his words, I smile broadly, but Ardishir’s face is gently reprimanding. “You must have known it, too. Or felt it. You were developing a friendship with him for three entire months. You had to have a sense of how he felt about you.” His look grows even firmer. “You should have told him about your situation.”
As I begin to say I didn’t know how, he holds up his hand to stop me. “None of that,” he says. “This is your life we’re talking about— your life ! You needed to be brave enough to move to Canada—he’s right—but before that, you needed to be courageous enough to give him the opportunity to help you. If Maryam hadn’t gone to him, you’d be heading back to Iran right now, all because you were too afraid to trust your feelings.”
Actually, I’d be marrying Haroun right now, but besides that, he’s right. My insides burn with shame. I’m the Cowardly Lion. “I don’t know that my feelings are trustworthy, Ardishir.”
Because I mumbled this, he makes me repeat myself and shakes his head when I do.
“You had to have a sense he’d help you,” he insists. “I’ve known the guy for under an hour, and it’s obvious he’s a straight shooter. That’s just it—he is. He would’ve heard you out. He would have considered the options, and he would have made his decision. If it wasn’t right for him, he wouldn’t have married you. But it’s remarkable to me that you never even gave him the chance. What’s up with that, Tami?”
I take a huge breath. “I knew I loved him, but . . .”
Ardishir persists. “But what?”
I knew I loved him.
I did.
“But I don’t know,” I say miserably, realizing exactly what the problem was: I loved Ike, but I didn’t see how he could really, honestly, truly love me. What have I done in my life to be worthy of his love?
Ardishir narrows his eyes. “What’s going to happen when your sister’s not there to save you?”
“Ike will save me.” I say this in a joking tone, hoping we can move on from this uncomfortable conversation, but Ardishir taps me on the knee.
“This is important,” he says. “Not something to joke about. You were setting yourself up for an unhappy ending. You know that, don’t you?”
“Now I do.”
“You didn’t at the time?”
I avert my eyes from his and look at my hands,
As I walk him outside to his truck, we make plans to meet at the guesthouse tomorrow morning. When we hug and kiss good-bye, he sighs with contentment and seems in no hurry to leave me, so I think maybe he’ll change his mind. But no—he climbs into his truck and puts the key in the ignition.
“Good night, Tami.”
“Good night, Ike.”
He must catch the wavering in my voice because he asks, “You all right?”
“I was just wondering, are you going to tell your parents about Haroun?”
He grins. “Is this your scaredy-cat way of asking me not to?”
I can’t help but smile. “I suppose it is.”
“Don’t worry about it,” he says. “Just leave my parents to me.”
We kiss good-bye all over again, and after he drives off, I go back inside to find Ardishir waiting for me on the couch. He pats a spot next to him for me to sit.
“Tami,” he says.
“Ardishir,” I say back playfully.
“Ike’s great,” he says. “He’s an absolutely great guy.”
His words warm my heart. “Thank you.”
“He’s one in a million,” he says. “A true prince among men.”
“He is, isn’t he?”
“But I have an issue.”
I swallow hard. Ardishir so seldom takes issue with anything, and when he does, he’s someone I listen to very seriously.
“Anyone can see he’s crazy about you.” At his words, I smile broadly, but Ardishir’s face is gently reprimanding. “You must have known it, too. Or felt it. You were developing a friendship with him for three entire months. You had to have a sense of how he felt about you.” His look grows even firmer. “You should have told him about your situation.”
As I begin to say I didn’t know how, he holds up his hand to stop me. “None of that,” he says. “This is your life we’re talking about— your life ! You needed to be brave enough to move to Canada—he’s right—but before that, you needed to be courageous enough to give him the opportunity to help you. If Maryam hadn’t gone to him, you’d be heading back to Iran right now, all because you were too afraid to trust your feelings.”
Actually, I’d be marrying Haroun right now, but besides that, he’s right. My insides burn with shame. I’m the Cowardly Lion. “I don’t know that my feelings are trustworthy, Ardishir.”
Because I mumbled this, he makes me repeat myself and shakes his head when I do.
“You had to have a sense he’d help you,” he insists. “I’ve known the guy for under an hour, and it’s obvious he’s a straight shooter. That’s just it—he is. He would’ve heard you out. He would have considered the options, and he would have made his decision. If it wasn’t right for him, he wouldn’t have married you. But it’s remarkable to me that you never even gave him the chance. What’s up with that, Tami?”
I take a huge breath. “I knew I loved him, but . . .”
Ardishir persists. “But what?”
I knew I loved him.
I did.
“But I don’t know,” I say miserably, realizing exactly what the problem was: I loved Ike, but I didn’t see how he could really, honestly, truly love me. What have I done in my life to be worthy of his love?
Ardishir narrows his eyes. “What’s going to happen when your sister’s not there to save you?”
“Ike will save me.” I say this in a joking tone, hoping we can move on from this uncomfortable conversation, but Ardishir taps me on the knee.
“This is important,” he says. “Not something to joke about. You were setting yourself up for an unhappy ending. You know that, don’t you?”
“Now I do.”
“You didn’t at the time?”
I avert my eyes from his and look at my hands,
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