Chapter 1
I’m dangling over a tank of water. Hundreds of sharks circle below. Every once in a while one leaps, its ferocious jaws snapping, trying to catch me in its teeth.
I’m screaming, making my throat ragged at the effort. But I can’t stop.
A large one launches itself at me. It gets a hold of my thigh and rips me from my hook above.
The pain is searing.
And I’m falling.
Down.
Down.
Down…
My body jerks awake. Zane isn’t in the bed. I shiver as I realize I’ve grown accustomed to the weight of his body next to mine: his warmth, the way he occasionally talks in his sleep, the way he sometimes pulls me close to him as though he needs me.
I shake the cobwebs of sleep from my mind and shower.
The dream is still vivid though, and I can’t help but think about it. The reason hits me square in the face. In the dream I was bait. And I realize I still feel like bait.
I’ve always been the bait.
And when a shark finally does catch me, it isn’t going to let me go.
I can’t help bu t wonder if I’d want it to. More important, I can’t help but wonder what it would be like not to be bait at all.
To just be me.
Not an it, but a him , my mind nags, thinking about the two men in my life: John Zane and John Cruze.
I rinse the soap from my hair and work to wash any thoughts about them from my mind. But it’s difficult. They are very different men, but over the past month I’ve come to appreciate certain aspects of both.
John Cruze and I had one accidental night together. It was amazing. Every time I remember it my body craves more.
John Zane is the man I was supposed to be with that night. He’s the man I’ve been with almost every night since. I’m not going to lie; my body has enjoyed the time we’ve spent together.
Every fucking second.
After my shower, I get ready : nothing special, just gray sweat pants and a white t-shirt. Even though today is a special day. Extremely special. I’ll be doing one of the sex scenes with John Cruze. The idea excites and terrifies me. I have no idea what to expect. Will we both be naked? Will there be people around? The unknown is what makes me most nervous. Well, that and the way my body might respond to John in front of other people, namely Zane. Like the way my body reacted when John asked me his twenty questions, the afternoon we had lunch. Peanut butter and jelly, sugar cookies, and sex talk.
“And if I took off my pants and slid my cock in your pussy, would you let me do that, too?”
Holy shit. Nooooo! “Yes. God, yes.”
He licks his lips and moves so our knees are touching.
“If I pulled you on top of me, would you ride my cock?”
Fuck. “Yes.”
“Would you come all over it?”
Cruze and I haven’t spoken of that day since, but I can’t help but think about him, the way my body felt when he asked his questions. The way his voice deepened and his features filled with lust. The way his lips moved when he spoke as his fingers grazed my skin.
We’ve seen each other many times. In meetings, or passing each other in the hall. Every once in a while I catch him looking at me and I wonder if he thinks about me too. We talk sometimes, the basic stuff.
“Hi.”
“How have you been?”
“The weather’s beautiful today.”
“That shirt matches your bewitching eyes.” That one was my favorite. He had to be remembering our time together when he said that. Right? I mean, he’d said it to me when we fucked.
I can’t help but sigh as I pull on a pair of white socks and tennis shoes.
I hope he does think about me. With every delicious tendril in my body, I hope.
“You read y to go, Cadence?” Lincoln asks when I walk into the living area of the hotel room. His features are stoic.
“Hi, Lincoln.” I shove a piece of toast in my mouth and pick up my purse. “I’m ready.” When we get to the door, I pat him on his big, beefy arm. “Thanks for driving me every day. I appreciate it.”
His hard expression
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