through the thirty punishment laps the captain gives me to run for being late. I curse myself every step of the way. I could blame Hayley for last night, but that wouldn’t entirely be fair. I am the one, after all, who decided to get wasted on expensive champagne.
Ivan calls me over at the end of practice. I managed to make four goals out of sheer rage. Terence kept taunting me.
“Looks like I’ve got my striker back,” he says. “Even if you were over an hour late.”
“I’m sorry, late night last night,” I reply, wiping my sweaty brow with one of Harry’s towels. It’s embroidered with his initials. I make a note to make fun of him for that later. “It won’t happen again.”
Ivan claps me heartily on the back. Then he narrows his eyes. “Everything alright with you, Mackenzie?”
“Nope,” I reply. I feel my heart has closed back up after what Hayley did to me. I don’t feel like sharing myself with anyone, much less my own coach. “Everything is business as usual.”
Ivan nods but he seems unconvinced. “Well, whatever it is, I like having the aggressive Mackenzie back. We have a chance at the cup if you keep playing like you did today. Even if you are a bit knackered from your binge last night.”
Ivan leaves me alone and I wander into the locker room. Terence is there waiting for me, just as I suspected he would be.
“Got your knickers in a twist, eh?” he taunts from across the steamy space.
“I’ve got an idea. Go fuck yourself,” I reply.
“Hayley looked pretty upset last night,” he says. “I showed up just in time to see her storming off. I looked after her though. Like a real man would.”
The hackles stand up on the back of my neck and I slam my locker door shut. “You want to say that again?”
Terence grins. “I said I took care of her.”
“You’re lying,” I say.
“Am I? Your front door is an awfully pretty shade of teal.”
I think this over in my head. I know Hayley wouldn’t let him into the house. He obviously walked her home. Stalked her home, more like. But he’s trying to get to me.
“Fuck off, Jones,” I spit at him.
“I’d rather fuck your girlfriend, actually. She seems like she’d be a pretty good lay,” he says. “She’s quite fit.”
I shove him into the lockers, my anger ripping through my body. “You shut the fuck up.”
Terence laughs and it only makes me angrier.
Harry has to pull me by the neck away from Terence.
“Not today. Not like this,” Harry mutters to me. “You’re on thin ice around here already, Mackenzie. Go shower. Go home. Sleep.”
Harry pushes me into a shower stall and turns the water onto the ice cold setting.
It snaps me out of my anger even if it’s not making me feel any better.
I ride the Tube home, the screeching rails cutting through my brain like a hot laser. I’m in misery. Utter and total misery.
But I’d rather be angry than feel hurt. They say that the wolf you feed is the wolf that wins.
I’m feeding the angry wolf.
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
HAYLEY
The streets of New Jersey are muggy and oppressive. I can smell every drop of gasoline, every puff of cigarette smoke. It all hangs in the air like a cloud refusing to dissipate. I feel like I’m choking being back here on United States soil.
I check my voicemails as I walk to long term parking at the airport. Sandra’s left me five messages, all of them telling me that I need to stop into the office before the day is over or I’m fired.
I left London around noon but with the time difference, I end up in Newark in the morning.
As tired as I am from the long flight, it’s not like I have a choice. I drive over to the office, parking my car on the top floor of the parking garage. I press the elevator button a few times before realizing it’s broken.
I have six flights of stairs to walk down. Sweat is pouring from my body by the time I get down to the bottom floor. I step into the street and see Brenda walking ten steps ahead of
Ivan calls me over at the end of practice. I managed to make four goals out of sheer rage. Terence kept taunting me.
“Looks like I’ve got my striker back,” he says. “Even if you were over an hour late.”
“I’m sorry, late night last night,” I reply, wiping my sweaty brow with one of Harry’s towels. It’s embroidered with his initials. I make a note to make fun of him for that later. “It won’t happen again.”
Ivan claps me heartily on the back. Then he narrows his eyes. “Everything alright with you, Mackenzie?”
“Nope,” I reply. I feel my heart has closed back up after what Hayley did to me. I don’t feel like sharing myself with anyone, much less my own coach. “Everything is business as usual.”
Ivan nods but he seems unconvinced. “Well, whatever it is, I like having the aggressive Mackenzie back. We have a chance at the cup if you keep playing like you did today. Even if you are a bit knackered from your binge last night.”
Ivan leaves me alone and I wander into the locker room. Terence is there waiting for me, just as I suspected he would be.
“Got your knickers in a twist, eh?” he taunts from across the steamy space.
“I’ve got an idea. Go fuck yourself,” I reply.
“Hayley looked pretty upset last night,” he says. “I showed up just in time to see her storming off. I looked after her though. Like a real man would.”
The hackles stand up on the back of my neck and I slam my locker door shut. “You want to say that again?”
Terence grins. “I said I took care of her.”
“You’re lying,” I say.
“Am I? Your front door is an awfully pretty shade of teal.”
I think this over in my head. I know Hayley wouldn’t let him into the house. He obviously walked her home. Stalked her home, more like. But he’s trying to get to me.
“Fuck off, Jones,” I spit at him.
“I’d rather fuck your girlfriend, actually. She seems like she’d be a pretty good lay,” he says. “She’s quite fit.”
I shove him into the lockers, my anger ripping through my body. “You shut the fuck up.”
Terence laughs and it only makes me angrier.
Harry has to pull me by the neck away from Terence.
“Not today. Not like this,” Harry mutters to me. “You’re on thin ice around here already, Mackenzie. Go shower. Go home. Sleep.”
Harry pushes me into a shower stall and turns the water onto the ice cold setting.
It snaps me out of my anger even if it’s not making me feel any better.
I ride the Tube home, the screeching rails cutting through my brain like a hot laser. I’m in misery. Utter and total misery.
But I’d rather be angry than feel hurt. They say that the wolf you feed is the wolf that wins.
I’m feeding the angry wolf.
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
HAYLEY
The streets of New Jersey are muggy and oppressive. I can smell every drop of gasoline, every puff of cigarette smoke. It all hangs in the air like a cloud refusing to dissipate. I feel like I’m choking being back here on United States soil.
I check my voicemails as I walk to long term parking at the airport. Sandra’s left me five messages, all of them telling me that I need to stop into the office before the day is over or I’m fired.
I left London around noon but with the time difference, I end up in Newark in the morning.
As tired as I am from the long flight, it’s not like I have a choice. I drive over to the office, parking my car on the top floor of the parking garage. I press the elevator button a few times before realizing it’s broken.
I have six flights of stairs to walk down. Sweat is pouring from my body by the time I get down to the bottom floor. I step into the street and see Brenda walking ten steps ahead of
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