Darkthaw by Kate A. Boorman Page A

two of them talking earlier.
    â€œSeeing this has made up her mind.”
    â€œHer mind?”
    â€œShe’s talking about that crossing,” he says. “She wants to head east.”
    I draw back. “With Charlie and the others?”
    â€œNot
with
them,” he says. “But she . . . she wants to head to that Dominion outpost. Figures she can get help going eastfrom there.” He rubs the back of his neck. “We leave Charlie, we’re leaving my ma and the boys. And I can’t—I can’t do that. Not before I know they’re safe.”
    I stare at him, taking in his meaning. “You want to go with her.” My stomach twists.
    â€œI want to get to that crossing.”
    â€œBut—but then what? They’d still have to journey all those days east. Henderson said that outpost was days away!”
    â€œI don’t know,” he says. “Mayhap you and I would take them?”
    I stare at him in shock. “I can’t leave Matisa.” After all she’s done, I can’t abandon her now. Bringing Kane’s family—that was Matisa making a sacrifice to ensure Kane didn’t have to, and bringing the Jameson family along was another: she was helping me live with myself. And my dreams are telling me to stay with her.
    â€œThen she can come with us,” he says.
    I stare at him. “To the people she believes are bringing war to her home?” My voice is heavy with disbelief.
    He scrubs his hands over his face. “We don’t
know
that’s true.”
    â€œNo,” I say. “I can’t ask it of her.”
    Kane clasps his hands at the back of his neck and looks skyward, blowing out his breath. The poplars creak around us unsettled-like, as though they can feel our desperation.
    He won’t leave his ma and the boys right now. It’s all over his face, in the way he stands.
    But . . . no. I need to fix this. Find a compromise. Days ago, Matisa talked about sending the boys on ahead if we were slow. That was before Nishwa was injured. It’s asking moreof her to stay with us now, but I don’t have much choice. “I’ll ask Matisa to stay with us till we reach the crossing,” I say. “Mayhap we’ll find a settlement after all. Or mayhap we’ll meet some good people who’ll take your ma and the boys east.”
    Kane drops his arms and looks down at me. “I can’t leave them before knowing they’re safe,” he says.
    I swallow hard. “But if Matisa will come with us, and it looks all right for your ma and the boys?”
    He looks away. “Guess we’ll deal with that when it comes.”
    I stare at his profile, willing away the tears that swell against the backs of my eyes. That day at the riverbank comes back to me—his skin searing into mine.
    I’ll go anywhere with you
, he’d said.
    But it’s not true.
    A flicker of anger lights in my chest. He knows how much being out here means to me, he knows I’ve pledged to stay with Matisa.
    I swallow and clear my throat. “Let’s see what Matisa says.”
    He nods. “Think that’d be best.”
    â€œI will take you to the crossing,” Matisa says, and the icy hand around my heart unclenches.
    I try hard not to breathe a sigh of relief.
    â€œNishwa needs to go.” Isi’s eyes narrow; a muscle works hard in his jaw.
    Kane and I stand with them near a dozing Nishwa, out of earshot of the camp, where the rest are busy setting up.
    â€œI know.”
    Isi stares at Matisa as she bends to Nishwa’s foot. Her expression is unconcerned as she turns his foot over, gentle. “I have been dreaming of you, Isi, taking care of an injured bird.” She looks up. “Perhaps this is what it meant. You can take him.”
    â€œAnd leave you here? No.” Isi shakes his head. “That is not what your dream meant. You will come with Nishwa and