did you even get here? To Arizona, I mean?”
“I don’t know. I just… I just followed…”
He knew exactly what she meant. That pull, that inner compass saying,
Come here. You need to come here.
“You followed instinct, right?”
She nodded. “Janna and I were hitchhiking, and it felt like…” She motioned vaguely while she groped for words.
“Like that kids’ game, playing hot and cold. Getting warmer, warmer… Right?”
“Right. It just felt right. But then it felt like we’d gone too far, so we got the driver to drop us off.”
“Where?” He held his breath. “Where?”
She stared at him. “Here. Not a block away from here. We were asking around for jobs, and one of the ranch hands sniffed us out and brought us to Tina…”
He nodded her along.
“And she took us back to the ranch. Even offered us a place to stay there, but…”
“But?” It felt as if his future hung on that word.
“But it didn’t
feel
right. So we asked her about something else…”
A long, relieved breath left him. He and Soren had done close to the same thing.
“She brought me to you,” Jess whispered. She stroked his shoulder gently. Almost hopefully.
“Destiny brought you here,” he said, finally certain of one thing. “Destiny brought us together again.”
He pulled her into another hug and hung on and on, because he finally understood. All the doubt, the pain, the hopelessness — it wasn’t for nothing. It had all been worthwhile, because it brought him back to his mate.
“You know what Soren and I did?” Now he was the one blabbering, but what did that matter? “We hunted every last rogue we could find. Killed every one that had been in Montana, down to the last one. And then we were done. Empty. Spent. Never felt so empty in my life. We dug a den and crawled into it…” He trailed off, choking on the thought, then forced himself to go on. She’d said her part; he’d say his. “We crawled in to die because we thought our mates were dead. Lay there for a week, waiting for it…”
She ran her hands over his back. “No! Simon! No.”
He shook his head. “But it didn’t work. My bear wouldn’t let go. And I thought I was a worse failure because of it.”
“What?” She pulled back. “How could you?”
“Not only did I fail my clan, I couldn’t even die like I should have. The way the old stories say. That when one mate dies…”
“…the other follows,” she finished. “They give up on life to follow their mate.”
He nodded. “And I couldn’t even do that right. But it wasn’t that…” God, now he understood. “My bear wouldn’t let go because you were still alive. You were still out there…”
“Looking for you,” she said.
Now it was his turn to stare. “Looking for me?”
She wiped the tears from her eyes and stood a little straighter. “I was looking for something. I didn’t know what. But it was you. I was looking for you.”
“You…” Even his bear was trembling inside.
Looking for me?
“I love you,” she whispered once, then said it louder. “I love you. Even when you didn’t love me—”
He winced. “I always loved you. I’m so, so sorry about the rest.”
Say it again, idiot,
his bear demanded.
Say both those things a thousand times.
He tried, but he couldn’t, because her eyes flashed and her hands tightened on his shirt.
“I’m sor—” he started, but he didn’t finish because she pulled him closer and covered his mouth with hers in a kiss. A kiss that knocked the wind out of him, it felt that good.
“Maybe it’s time we both stopped being sorry,” she said when she came up for air. “Maybe it’s time we just let ourselves live.”
He tried to say something, even if he had no clue what that might be. But then it didn’t matter any more, because she kissed him again. Nudged the length of her body along the length of his and ignited a whole different fire inside.
Chapter Thirteen
Jess closed her eyes and focused
“I don’t know. I just… I just followed…”
He knew exactly what she meant. That pull, that inner compass saying,
Come here. You need to come here.
“You followed instinct, right?”
She nodded. “Janna and I were hitchhiking, and it felt like…” She motioned vaguely while she groped for words.
“Like that kids’ game, playing hot and cold. Getting warmer, warmer… Right?”
“Right. It just felt right. But then it felt like we’d gone too far, so we got the driver to drop us off.”
“Where?” He held his breath. “Where?”
She stared at him. “Here. Not a block away from here. We were asking around for jobs, and one of the ranch hands sniffed us out and brought us to Tina…”
He nodded her along.
“And she took us back to the ranch. Even offered us a place to stay there, but…”
“But?” It felt as if his future hung on that word.
“But it didn’t
feel
right. So we asked her about something else…”
A long, relieved breath left him. He and Soren had done close to the same thing.
“She brought me to you,” Jess whispered. She stroked his shoulder gently. Almost hopefully.
“Destiny brought you here,” he said, finally certain of one thing. “Destiny brought us together again.”
He pulled her into another hug and hung on and on, because he finally understood. All the doubt, the pain, the hopelessness — it wasn’t for nothing. It had all been worthwhile, because it brought him back to his mate.
“You know what Soren and I did?” Now he was the one blabbering, but what did that matter? “We hunted every last rogue we could find. Killed every one that had been in Montana, down to the last one. And then we were done. Empty. Spent. Never felt so empty in my life. We dug a den and crawled into it…” He trailed off, choking on the thought, then forced himself to go on. She’d said her part; he’d say his. “We crawled in to die because we thought our mates were dead. Lay there for a week, waiting for it…”
She ran her hands over his back. “No! Simon! No.”
He shook his head. “But it didn’t work. My bear wouldn’t let go. And I thought I was a worse failure because of it.”
“What?” She pulled back. “How could you?”
“Not only did I fail my clan, I couldn’t even die like I should have. The way the old stories say. That when one mate dies…”
“…the other follows,” she finished. “They give up on life to follow their mate.”
He nodded. “And I couldn’t even do that right. But it wasn’t that…” God, now he understood. “My bear wouldn’t let go because you were still alive. You were still out there…”
“Looking for you,” she said.
Now it was his turn to stare. “Looking for me?”
She wiped the tears from her eyes and stood a little straighter. “I was looking for something. I didn’t know what. But it was you. I was looking for you.”
“You…” Even his bear was trembling inside.
Looking for me?
“I love you,” she whispered once, then said it louder. “I love you. Even when you didn’t love me—”
He winced. “I always loved you. I’m so, so sorry about the rest.”
Say it again, idiot,
his bear demanded.
Say both those things a thousand times.
He tried, but he couldn’t, because her eyes flashed and her hands tightened on his shirt.
“I’m sor—” he started, but he didn’t finish because she pulled him closer and covered his mouth with hers in a kiss. A kiss that knocked the wind out of him, it felt that good.
“Maybe it’s time we both stopped being sorry,” she said when she came up for air. “Maybe it’s time we just let ourselves live.”
He tried to say something, even if he had no clue what that might be. But then it didn’t matter any more, because she kissed him again. Nudged the length of her body along the length of his and ignited a whole different fire inside.
Chapter Thirteen
Jess closed her eyes and focused
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