perfect.” Marianne spoke calmly, unfazed by Sheila’s anxiety. “When he finds out you’re a sex addict, you can show him that brochure. It will help him to know you’re serious about getting help.”
“You’ve got to be shitting me!” Sheila’s voice was only a few decibels shy of a shriek. “You seriously want me to go to rehab? Now?”
“I didn’t say that. But I think it should be part of the discussion, yes.” Marianne pinched the space between her eyes and sighed. “I’m not trying to make your life more complicated, Sheila. I’m trying to help you uncomplicate it. I’ve been thinking about this a lot, and I believe you need more intensive treatment. I don’t think Sex Addicts Anonymous is helping you enough. You need more.”
“I have you.”
“I’m not enough either.” Marianne’s smile was sad. “I’m your friend, right? You trust me, don’t you?”
Sheila slumped. “I can’t believe you’re springing this on me now.”
“Well, that’s where I screwed up,” Marianne said bluntly. “Iwasn’t separating your therapy from our friendship. I’m trying to now, and I should have said this a long time ago.” She leaned forward. “Listen to me. I want you to go to New Trails. Before the wedding, after the wedding, no matter so long as you discuss it with Morris before you get married. He deserves to have the option of backing out. If you want your relationship to survive this, you have to let him feel he has a choice in the matter. Otherwise he’ll feel like you trapped him. But regardless of what he decides, you need to go.”
Sheila took a deep breath, trying to stay calm. She felt like a rabbit caught in a trap. “I’m already committed to telling Morris everything, Marianne. As soon as I see him. But I can’t go to rehab. You don’t know what you’re asking. I don’t want the university to find out about my addiction. Ethan hasn’t released the video, and if he’s bluffing, there’s no need to—”
“I understand your logic. I agree Ethan could be blowing smoke. But that has nothing to do with this. I don’t care what you tell the university. You still need to go, whether the university knows the truth or not.”
It hurt to breathe. “I’d have to take a leave of absence. What am I supposed to say?”
“We’ll figure something out.”
Sheila stared at the plush carpet for a full minute before looking back up at Marianne, feeling more helpless than she ever thought possible. She knew Marianne was right. If their positions had been reversed, she’d be saying the exact same things. “Fine, I’ll consider it. I’ll talk to Morris, see what he thinks.” But she already knew what Morris would say. Morris would tell her to go. Without a doubt.
The question was, would he still marry her?
Sheila put her head in her hands, tears welling in her eyes. How had it come to this? She was a smart woman, a trainedpsychologist, an excellent teacher. How could she have made so many mistakes? “Ethan Wolfe. Jesus Christ . What was I thinking?”
Marianne, her face filled with a mixture of compassion and relief, reached across the coffee table and touched Sheila’s arm. “Not that I’ve met him, but I’d guess he’s a textbook antisocial personality. He’d have to be to take it this far.”
Sheila plucked a Kleenex from the box on the table and dabbed her eyes. “He’s a sociopath, Marianne. How did I not see it till now?”
“Sociopaths are beautiful liars.”
“Still. I should have seen this coming.” Sheila laughed bitterly. “I’m supposed to be an expert on human behavior. And I missed this?”
“You’re also human .”
The soft lighting in Marianne’s office suddenly seemed too bright. Sheila rubbed her eyes. “Is this what rock bottom feels like?”
“Yes,” the therapist said. “I won’t bullshit you. And there’s only one way out.”
“Maybe I should just leave now.” Sheila sniffled. “You want me to go to Oregon? Why don’t I
“You’ve got to be shitting me!” Sheila’s voice was only a few decibels shy of a shriek. “You seriously want me to go to rehab? Now?”
“I didn’t say that. But I think it should be part of the discussion, yes.” Marianne pinched the space between her eyes and sighed. “I’m not trying to make your life more complicated, Sheila. I’m trying to help you uncomplicate it. I’ve been thinking about this a lot, and I believe you need more intensive treatment. I don’t think Sex Addicts Anonymous is helping you enough. You need more.”
“I have you.”
“I’m not enough either.” Marianne’s smile was sad. “I’m your friend, right? You trust me, don’t you?”
Sheila slumped. “I can’t believe you’re springing this on me now.”
“Well, that’s where I screwed up,” Marianne said bluntly. “Iwasn’t separating your therapy from our friendship. I’m trying to now, and I should have said this a long time ago.” She leaned forward. “Listen to me. I want you to go to New Trails. Before the wedding, after the wedding, no matter so long as you discuss it with Morris before you get married. He deserves to have the option of backing out. If you want your relationship to survive this, you have to let him feel he has a choice in the matter. Otherwise he’ll feel like you trapped him. But regardless of what he decides, you need to go.”
Sheila took a deep breath, trying to stay calm. She felt like a rabbit caught in a trap. “I’m already committed to telling Morris everything, Marianne. As soon as I see him. But I can’t go to rehab. You don’t know what you’re asking. I don’t want the university to find out about my addiction. Ethan hasn’t released the video, and if he’s bluffing, there’s no need to—”
“I understand your logic. I agree Ethan could be blowing smoke. But that has nothing to do with this. I don’t care what you tell the university. You still need to go, whether the university knows the truth or not.”
It hurt to breathe. “I’d have to take a leave of absence. What am I supposed to say?”
“We’ll figure something out.”
Sheila stared at the plush carpet for a full minute before looking back up at Marianne, feeling more helpless than she ever thought possible. She knew Marianne was right. If their positions had been reversed, she’d be saying the exact same things. “Fine, I’ll consider it. I’ll talk to Morris, see what he thinks.” But she already knew what Morris would say. Morris would tell her to go. Without a doubt.
The question was, would he still marry her?
Sheila put her head in her hands, tears welling in her eyes. How had it come to this? She was a smart woman, a trainedpsychologist, an excellent teacher. How could she have made so many mistakes? “Ethan Wolfe. Jesus Christ . What was I thinking?”
Marianne, her face filled with a mixture of compassion and relief, reached across the coffee table and touched Sheila’s arm. “Not that I’ve met him, but I’d guess he’s a textbook antisocial personality. He’d have to be to take it this far.”
Sheila plucked a Kleenex from the box on the table and dabbed her eyes. “He’s a sociopath, Marianne. How did I not see it till now?”
“Sociopaths are beautiful liars.”
“Still. I should have seen this coming.” Sheila laughed bitterly. “I’m supposed to be an expert on human behavior. And I missed this?”
“You’re also human .”
The soft lighting in Marianne’s office suddenly seemed too bright. Sheila rubbed her eyes. “Is this what rock bottom feels like?”
“Yes,” the therapist said. “I won’t bullshit you. And there’s only one way out.”
“Maybe I should just leave now.” Sheila sniffled. “You want me to go to Oregon? Why don’t I
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