off at school, her happy euphoric bubble got shot all to hell.
She pulled her Jeep into the garage just as Tucker was getting home from work. It was garbage day and she walked out to the curb to pull her empty can inside.
Tucker being Tucker, he met her in the driveway and pulled it inside for her. She quickly shut the garage door and he followed her into the kitchen.
A smile played at the corner of her mouth. “Want coffee?”
“What are you doing tomorrow night? I have it off. I thought we could go to Ruby’s. Some of the guys said Ruby’s serves a good steak but to avoid the seafood.”
Ruby’s? Her smile fell. A restaurant in the middle of downtown Lovett—where the news that she was dating young Deputy Matthews would reach everyone by dessert. That wasn’t taking things slow. What she felt was so new, she wasn’t ready for that. “I have Pip.”
“Can’t he stay with your mom or sister for a few hours.”
“That’s awfully short notice, Tucker.”
He folded his arms over his beige work shirt. “What about Sunday?”
“I don’t know.” He was pushing her. She understood him, but there was so much to think about. Everything was happening too fast. He said he loved her, but could she let herself love him as much as he deserved? That crazy kind of love that consumed and burned? She was too old and had too much to lose to love like that again. “I have a lot of work.”
“Monday.”
“How about someplace in Amarillo.” That was a nice compromise. “The restaurants are better in Amarillo.”
“No. How about Ruby’s?”
“Why?”
“Because I’m tired of hiding. I want a whole life with you. You and Pip.”
“You’re young. How do you even know what you want? When I was thirty, I thought I wanted something different than I want now.”
“Quit treating me like a kid. I might be eight years younger than you, but I’ve lived a lot of different lives—enough of them to know what I want and what I don’t want. I love you, Lily. I told you that and I meant it. I want to be with you. I’m into you one hundred percent, but if you aren’t, you need to tell me. I’m no one’s secret. Either you’re in one hundred percent with me, or I’m out.”
Out? A panicky little bubble lifted her stomach. “It’s been just a little over a month!”
“It’s been almost two months since I fell in love with you that first morning I saw you with curlers in your hair and bunny slippers on your feet. Knowing you love someone doesn’t take time. It doesn’t take ten years or ten months to figure it out. It takes looking across a driveway and feeling like you’ve been hit in the chest—like you can’t breathe.”
Out? Her head spun and the panicky bubble grew in her abdomen. Love made her impulsive and emotional and irrational. It made her panicky and crazy, and she’d worked so hard to be rational and sane. She didn’t want to be crazy, but she didn’t want to let him go. She was so conflicted she couldn’t think, and she hated that feeling. It brought back all sorts of other feelings and memories . . . of pain and betrayal and hair-pulling fights. “I need a little more time.”
He shook his head. “I’m not waiting around for the crumbs from your table. I spent my whole childhood doing that. The outsider looking in. Waiting. Wanting what would never be mine. I can’t do it anymore, Lily.” He folded his arms over his chest. “Are you in or out? It’s that simple.”
There was so much to think about. Her. Pip. What if he left her after a few months or years? Would she survive this time? Would she lose her mind again? “Why are you so stubborn about this?”
“I’m not stubborn, Lily. I just know what I want. If you don’t want the same thing, if you don’t want to be with me, you need to tell me now. Before I get in any deeper and start thinking I can have things that I can’t.”
“It’s not that easy, Tucker. You can’t expect me to make a decision right this very
She pulled her Jeep into the garage just as Tucker was getting home from work. It was garbage day and she walked out to the curb to pull her empty can inside.
Tucker being Tucker, he met her in the driveway and pulled it inside for her. She quickly shut the garage door and he followed her into the kitchen.
A smile played at the corner of her mouth. “Want coffee?”
“What are you doing tomorrow night? I have it off. I thought we could go to Ruby’s. Some of the guys said Ruby’s serves a good steak but to avoid the seafood.”
Ruby’s? Her smile fell. A restaurant in the middle of downtown Lovett—where the news that she was dating young Deputy Matthews would reach everyone by dessert. That wasn’t taking things slow. What she felt was so new, she wasn’t ready for that. “I have Pip.”
“Can’t he stay with your mom or sister for a few hours.”
“That’s awfully short notice, Tucker.”
He folded his arms over his beige work shirt. “What about Sunday?”
“I don’t know.” He was pushing her. She understood him, but there was so much to think about. Everything was happening too fast. He said he loved her, but could she let herself love him as much as he deserved? That crazy kind of love that consumed and burned? She was too old and had too much to lose to love like that again. “I have a lot of work.”
“Monday.”
“How about someplace in Amarillo.” That was a nice compromise. “The restaurants are better in Amarillo.”
“No. How about Ruby’s?”
“Why?”
“Because I’m tired of hiding. I want a whole life with you. You and Pip.”
“You’re young. How do you even know what you want? When I was thirty, I thought I wanted something different than I want now.”
“Quit treating me like a kid. I might be eight years younger than you, but I’ve lived a lot of different lives—enough of them to know what I want and what I don’t want. I love you, Lily. I told you that and I meant it. I want to be with you. I’m into you one hundred percent, but if you aren’t, you need to tell me. I’m no one’s secret. Either you’re in one hundred percent with me, or I’m out.”
Out? A panicky little bubble lifted her stomach. “It’s been just a little over a month!”
“It’s been almost two months since I fell in love with you that first morning I saw you with curlers in your hair and bunny slippers on your feet. Knowing you love someone doesn’t take time. It doesn’t take ten years or ten months to figure it out. It takes looking across a driveway and feeling like you’ve been hit in the chest—like you can’t breathe.”
Out? Her head spun and the panicky bubble grew in her abdomen. Love made her impulsive and emotional and irrational. It made her panicky and crazy, and she’d worked so hard to be rational and sane. She didn’t want to be crazy, but she didn’t want to let him go. She was so conflicted she couldn’t think, and she hated that feeling. It brought back all sorts of other feelings and memories . . . of pain and betrayal and hair-pulling fights. “I need a little more time.”
He shook his head. “I’m not waiting around for the crumbs from your table. I spent my whole childhood doing that. The outsider looking in. Waiting. Wanting what would never be mine. I can’t do it anymore, Lily.” He folded his arms over his chest. “Are you in or out? It’s that simple.”
There was so much to think about. Her. Pip. What if he left her after a few months or years? Would she survive this time? Would she lose her mind again? “Why are you so stubborn about this?”
“I’m not stubborn, Lily. I just know what I want. If you don’t want the same thing, if you don’t want to be with me, you need to tell me now. Before I get in any deeper and start thinking I can have things that I can’t.”
“It’s not that easy, Tucker. You can’t expect me to make a decision right this very
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