Courtship of the Cake by Jessica Topper Page A

probably fall back on alpha males and sexualselection, being the animal behaviorist she was. My father, a noted psychologist, would skip the Freud-Jung psychosexual stuff and head right for the good ol’ Savior Complex.
    Jax and Laney would have a complete conniption.
    Engaged to Nash Drama?
The
Nash Drama, of Go Get Her fame? My mantra would morph from
WWDD
to
WDDDI
. Friends would no longer police themselves in situations by asking
What Would Dani Do?
They would simply want to know
Why Did Dani Do It?
    Betrothing myself to one of the country’s cockiest, rowdiest rock stars was hardly a moral imperative.
    And it was the reason I hadn’t told anyone I was coming into town.
    I had absently wandered down the Wedding Etiquette aisle. The bindings of the books there were thick, the fonts elegant, and their color choices subdued and stylish. There was something there for every situation—from the
Town & Country Insiders’ Guide
to the
Total & Complete Idiot’s Guide
—that walked you step-by-step through the proposal, planning, and executing stages of the wedding of your dreams. I ran my hand vaguely over them, as if to glean answers via osmosis. The two-carat oval-cut stunner, set in platinum and hanging from my finger, was my invitation to the exclusive club chattered about within the pages.
    Or was it?
    If there really were something here for every situation, would I find the solutions to mine within the alphabetical index?
    I pulled the fattest tome from the shelf and flipped to the back. Nope. Nothing under
Convenience
, as in “Engagement of.” Nothing under
Fake
,
Sham
or
Have you lost your flippin’ mind, girl?
either.
    Sighing, I pulled the slimmest book from the shelf and let it fall open to the middle.
    Deciding on a theme first will guide you and your groom in the decisions and selections of the venue, décor, food, and drinks, aswell as many other critical details to ensure a flawless, fun-filled day is had by all. Choose a theme which best suits your personalities to help set the tone for your perfect day.
    I chuckled to myself. After spending almost three months traveling with a major music festival, my only requirement would be a venue with indoor plumbing. I didn’t want to see another Porta-John or rustic shower for the rest of my life. Nash’s idea of “setting the tone” would probably be choosing Madison Square Garden as the venue and using scrims, mover lights, and hazers for the décor. Dinner would be self-serve from chafing dishes left out by catering for a questionable length of time, and drinks would be on ice in coolers under the tables. Groupies would be in attendance, and clothing would be optional.
It’s a backstage greenroom free-for-all wedding theme!
    I slid the book back into its slot. Posy had done a beautiful job with her New Orleans wedding. More “concept” than theme, my sister and her husband Pat’s nuptials were the most genuine and personal expression of love I had ever witnessed. I would’ve expected nothing less from them. Part vintage, part vaudeville, wholly authentic to their aesthetic vision.
    A second-line parade had led us through the quaint French Quarter from ceremony to reception, where a sign commanding MASKS ON ushered us past a red velvet curtain. The large space had crumbling stonework, wrought iron balconies, and a soaring whisper dome. I remembered the way everything transformed the moment I tied the ribbon to secure my gold mask with its black feather plumes and stepped in. The air felt electric.
    And it crackled when Mick had walked into the room.
    â€¢Â Â Â â€¢Â Â Â â€¢
    I noticed the vest right away, its black angles against the stark white of his dress shirt creating a timeless look and accentuating his well-defined arms. Many of the guys at the wedding had already strippedthemselves of their formal jackets, but their ties still held them in a stranglehold, making them