couple of years. I’d barely
even scratched the surface, but it was a bitchy thing to do. It wasn’t like me.
“Shut the fuck up,” Emily screeched at me.
“You’re so fucking holier than thou. Think you’re so much better than us
because you’ve got some rich boyfriend you’ve promised to wait for, when really
you’re a joke.”
“Why am I a joke?” I felt irritated by her
tone. “Just because I don’t want to sleep around? It’s my choice what I do with
my body, and I happen to think he’s worth waiting for.”
“Oh, give me a break, he’s no better than
the rest of them. Just ask Clarissa.”
“What do you mean ‘ask Clarissa’?” Clarissa
and I had crossed paths a couple of times since the summer I’d first met her. She’d
always been a bitch, but I’d just tried to ignore her jealousy. She’d never
forgiven me for Hardy dumping her.
“You should really get yourself on Facebook,
Delilah,” Emily said, on a roll now. “You said Hardy couldn’t come over this
summer because he had a summer job?”
“Yeah, what about it?” I had the feeling of
impending doom in my gut – knowing I was about to hurtle past the point of
no return and fearing what I would find there.
“Well, he sure made time for Clarissa when
she went over to see him, judging by the photos she posted. Didn’t look like
there was much in the way of work going on. It looked a lot like one of their
usual get-togethers. She was there for weeks. You’re a fool for believing him,
Delilah. He certainly hasn’t been waiting for you.”
“I don’t believe you,” I told her, my voice
trembling. She raised an eyebrow, reached for her iPad and pulled up her
Facebook page. A couple of clicks later, she held it out towards me. I didn’t
want to take it. I knew I could refuse and leave myself in ignorant bliss, but
part of me wanted to know the truth. I reached out and took it from her, finally
looking down at the page.
Clarissa’s beaming face smiled up at me,
accompanied by Hardy’s. He had his arm around her shoulder. He’d sent me a few
photos over the time we’d been apart, but none like this when he’d looked so happy.
I swiped the page to find the next image. It was captioned ‘reacquainting
myself with an old friend’. This time she was straddling him while he sat on a
chair. Her arms were around his neck and he was gazing up, grinning like a loon,
their groins pressed against each other. I could see various outlines of other
guys around the side of the room. I could guess exactly what was going on based
on what I’d seen at Charles’. I felt sick.
“I told you,” Emily said, smug now, “he’s
no better than any of them. I don’t know what you think you were doing waiting
for him.” She sounded pleased to see me tumble off my holier-than-thou
pedestal.
“Is she back?” I asked.
“Who?”
“Clarissa. Is she still in the States, or
is she back?” Just the fact he’d spent time with her but couldn’t spare any for
me hurt like hell. I needed to hear it from her what had happened.
“Yeah, she’s back, but you can’t be
thinking about going there, are you? She’ll eat you for breakfast.” She moved
to block my path.
“Get out of my way,” I insisted, dodging
round her to grab the keys to Ma’s car. I’d passed my test at the first attempt
last summer. I couldn’t afford my own car yet, but Ma let me borrow hers
whenever I wanted.
“Fucking hell,” Emily said, mouth agape as
I moved swiftly towards the door. “You’ve finally lost it.” But she grabbed her
bag and followed me out, excited by all the drama and clearly not wanting to
miss a minute. Drama that didn’t revolve around her for once.
When we pulled into the driveway I nearly
lost my nerve, intimidated once again by the overwhelming size of her house. The
car crunched to a halt in front of the steps and I was out and moving before
Emily had even unfastened her seat belt. I rang the doorbell before my courage
fled and
even scratched the surface, but it was a bitchy thing to do. It wasn’t like me.
“Shut the fuck up,” Emily screeched at me.
“You’re so fucking holier than thou. Think you’re so much better than us
because you’ve got some rich boyfriend you’ve promised to wait for, when really
you’re a joke.”
“Why am I a joke?” I felt irritated by her
tone. “Just because I don’t want to sleep around? It’s my choice what I do with
my body, and I happen to think he’s worth waiting for.”
“Oh, give me a break, he’s no better than
the rest of them. Just ask Clarissa.”
“What do you mean ‘ask Clarissa’?” Clarissa
and I had crossed paths a couple of times since the summer I’d first met her. She’d
always been a bitch, but I’d just tried to ignore her jealousy. She’d never
forgiven me for Hardy dumping her.
“You should really get yourself on Facebook,
Delilah,” Emily said, on a roll now. “You said Hardy couldn’t come over this
summer because he had a summer job?”
“Yeah, what about it?” I had the feeling of
impending doom in my gut – knowing I was about to hurtle past the point of
no return and fearing what I would find there.
“Well, he sure made time for Clarissa when
she went over to see him, judging by the photos she posted. Didn’t look like
there was much in the way of work going on. It looked a lot like one of their
usual get-togethers. She was there for weeks. You’re a fool for believing him,
Delilah. He certainly hasn’t been waiting for you.”
“I don’t believe you,” I told her, my voice
trembling. She raised an eyebrow, reached for her iPad and pulled up her
Facebook page. A couple of clicks later, she held it out towards me. I didn’t
want to take it. I knew I could refuse and leave myself in ignorant bliss, but
part of me wanted to know the truth. I reached out and took it from her, finally
looking down at the page.
Clarissa’s beaming face smiled up at me,
accompanied by Hardy’s. He had his arm around her shoulder. He’d sent me a few
photos over the time we’d been apart, but none like this when he’d looked so happy.
I swiped the page to find the next image. It was captioned ‘reacquainting
myself with an old friend’. This time she was straddling him while he sat on a
chair. Her arms were around his neck and he was gazing up, grinning like a loon,
their groins pressed against each other. I could see various outlines of other
guys around the side of the room. I could guess exactly what was going on based
on what I’d seen at Charles’. I felt sick.
“I told you,” Emily said, smug now, “he’s
no better than any of them. I don’t know what you think you were doing waiting
for him.” She sounded pleased to see me tumble off my holier-than-thou
pedestal.
“Is she back?” I asked.
“Who?”
“Clarissa. Is she still in the States, or
is she back?” Just the fact he’d spent time with her but couldn’t spare any for
me hurt like hell. I needed to hear it from her what had happened.
“Yeah, she’s back, but you can’t be
thinking about going there, are you? She’ll eat you for breakfast.” She moved
to block my path.
“Get out of my way,” I insisted, dodging
round her to grab the keys to Ma’s car. I’d passed my test at the first attempt
last summer. I couldn’t afford my own car yet, but Ma let me borrow hers
whenever I wanted.
“Fucking hell,” Emily said, mouth agape as
I moved swiftly towards the door. “You’ve finally lost it.” But she grabbed her
bag and followed me out, excited by all the drama and clearly not wanting to
miss a minute. Drama that didn’t revolve around her for once.
When we pulled into the driveway I nearly
lost my nerve, intimidated once again by the overwhelming size of her house. The
car crunched to a halt in front of the steps and I was out and moving before
Emily had even unfastened her seat belt. I rang the doorbell before my courage
fled and
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