City in Ruins by R.K. Ryals

of
Cadeyrn’s personality, but this side was new. I was afraid to move,
afraid he’d shut himself off once more.
    “War isn’t fair,” I whispered.
    What started off as anger and grief slowly
ebbed out of me, chased away by my wonder, by the need to keep the
prince talking.
    Cadeyrn closed the distance between us, his
fingers coupling with my fist, forcing it open. With my pendant in
his hand, he stepped behind me. Carefully moving my messy braid, he
fastened it around my neck. The stars winked down at us like Feras’
pile of gemstones, diamonds pressed against black
velvet.
    “It was my destiny to die,” Cadeyrn said, his
breath fanning my neck as his hands fell away. “He would have made
a good king, and you would have been a spectacular queen. Together,
you would have brought an age of peace.”
    For the first time, I realized my guilt was
nothing compared to Cadeyrn’s. It wasn’t just because of his
deceased wife. He blamed himself for my pain, for the loss of
people he didn’t rule. His life had always been about fighting. For
everyone but himself.
    Turning, I peered up at him. “If you want me to
quit trying so hard to be strong, I want you to take a moment and
quit fighting.”
    His mouth tightened, his blue eyes navy in the
darkness. “I can’t stop.”
    My heart was a well of sadness. “I’m not
allowed to show you how.” The words fell from my lips unchecked. I
didn’t have the right to say them. I’d spoken out of turn, but I
couldn’t take them back, and I didn’t want to.
    Cadeyrn peered down at me, his mouth
thoughtful, the fire in his eyes banked like embers flaring after
they’d burned low. “Drastona Maree Consta-Mayria,” he murmured. My
name sounded foreign on his tongue, fuller. Reverent. “The daughter
of so many, and yet she belongs to no one.”
    A deep loneliness settled over me, the truth of
his words an invisible cloak more powerful than tattoos, mage
powers, and hooded scribe robes.
    The prince’s hand found my cheek, his fingers
curling against my skin. The look I saw in his gaze was raw, more
open than anything I’d ever seen from him.
    His face lowered, his lips hovering just above
mine.
    “Don’t,” I whispered, my gaze finding his.
“Because if you asked me to, no matter how wrong I know it is, I
wouldn’t be able to say no.”
    It’s a mystery what brings some lives together.
Destiny, karma, and the gods’ influence. None of that mattered.
Minds often chose different paths from the heart, led by duty and
circumstance. The heart, however, spoke for itself. It didn’t seek
out what was easy. It loved what was hard.
    Cadeyrn’s finger touched my lips, his head
rising. “Your dragon has it right, Aean Brirg. Despite everything
dueling inside of you, despite the fact that you’ll never be able
to completely give up the pain you hold, you’d make a magnificent
ruler. If it was within my power, I’d make you one.”
    Surprising myself and him, I pressed my lips
against his finger, kissing it. “No one ever asked me if I wanted
to be a queen of anything. I don’t need power, Your Majesty. All I
ask for is peace,” my gaze caught his, “and happiness for those I
care about.”
    Cadeyrn sighed, his lips brushing against my
forehead, lingering there a moment before he stepped back. “You
know what else you’d make, Aean Brirg?” he asked, his gaze falling
to my waist. “A great mother.”
    My hand flew to my stomach, his words making me
yearn for a future that wasn’t mine.
    “I think I would have liked that,” I
said.
    Something odd flashed in the prince’s eyes, but
before I could question it, it was gone. His hands moved, his feet
putting more distance between us.
    “Remember to let go of the pain,” the prince
said, and was gone.
    I stumbled to the side of the deck, my hands
fisted against my stomach, the pendant heavy around my neck, my
gaze on the stars.
    Weirdly, loss had made me closer to the people
I’d loved in life, creating this