Charm School by Anne Fine Page A

rim, Esmeralda sang on.
    ‘
What care I for tempests
?
    I shall have no fear
.
    A proud and yellow buttercup
,
    Simple flower of cheer
.’
    On the last note, Bonny and Araminta switched up to TEMPEST. Instantly both halves of Esmeralda’s little buttercup outfit ripped off and swirled away into the wings. Determined not to fail at the last minute, Esmeralda resolutely bawled out the last verse in her vest and knickers.
    ‘
See me in my beauty!
    Watch me in my pride!
    A glorious golden buttercup
,
    Springtime’s happy bride!
’
    Still grinning at one another, Bonny and Araminta switched to OFF. Just for a moment, Bonny feared there might have been some electrical fault because out in the big room the noise seemed to be carrying on without fading. But then she realized it was all the others, roaring their approval.
    ‘Esmeralda, that was the funniest thing I’ve ever seen!’
    ‘Brilliant!’
    ‘You’re so clever, keeping it a secret till the show!’
    ‘You never told us you were so good at comedy skits!’
    While they were all applauding, long and loud, Araminta rushed round the back of the stage and lifted Esmeralda’s slinky green skirt off the lantern from which it was dangling. She ran on stage and handed it to Esmeralda, who hugged it to her body and proudly took bow after bow. Then, nervously, Esmeralda looked at Mrs Opalene.
    Mrs Opalene’s lips pursed. On the one hand, here was a girl with blown-about hair standing unashamedly on a stage in her underwear. But on the other hand, everyone was cheering frenziedly, and she did so want all of her girls to be happy.
    ‘Well, dear,’ said Mrs Opalene at last, choosing her words with care. ‘That was a shade outlandish, I confess. But I think everyone enjoyed it thoroughly.’
    Esmeralda beamed. She wasn’t sure quite what outlandish meant. But she knew about enjoying things thoroughly. Especially warm applause. In fact, she wouldn’t mind trying the song all over again sometime soon. She could do it even better. She could put in some of those silly faces she made to amuse her baby sister. And she could rewrite the words of the song so it was a weather forecaster standing there. That would be even funnier. Or she could—
    ‘Next!’ called Mrs Opalene firmly.
    Amethyst floated up the steps onto the stage, flicked her hair and stood shyly in her glorious silver gown, cradling a glittering wand. She couldn’t help feeling a little bit more nervous than usual. The other two had had such very exciting acts. They’d been such fun to watch. And all she had was … Well, never mind. What Mrs Opalene always said was, ‘Don’t waste time wishing yourself like other people. Just make the best of what you have.’
    What she had was pretty unexciting. But she’d make the very best of it.
    ‘I’m going to perform
The Dance of the Evening Star
,’ she explained to them carefully. ‘I’m going to be Starlight. As evening falls around me, I wake and flutter to and fro, touching the wonders of nature lightly with my starry wand.’ She waved it, to show them. ‘And everything glistens with starlight, just for me, because everything loves me so much.’
    In the control room Bonny shook her head in amazement that anyone would willingly dance something so soppy. She couldn’t imagine anything more likely to banish any lingering doubts she might have had that she was doing Mrs Opalene’s girls a giant favour, sparking up their Curls and Purls Show.
    ‘Anyway,’ went on Amethyst, ‘I dance all night, except that, obviously, in the dance, the night only lasts two minutes. Then I curl up in my forest dell and fall asleep. And daybreak comes. Then I wake up and flee.’
    ‘Lovely!’ said Mrs Opalene, filled with relief that one of her precious girls, at least, was planning something more ladylike and traditional. ‘Lovely, dear Amethyst! I do so look forward to seeing how very elegantly you can flee.’
    Amethyst smiled. Her beautiful face lit up. ‘Yes,’ she