torturous.”
“Did you try negotiating?”
“My parents don’t negotiate. Strawberry
Shortcake wallpaper. Remember?”
Casey grimaced at the memory of that one. When Leigh was ten her mother
wallpapered her room with a horrid pink and white wallpaper that featured a
little girl holding strawberries. It wasn’t Strawberry Shortcake per se but the resemblance was close
enough that most visitors to the room thought it was. When Leigh entered junior high she
begged her mother to take the wallpaper down. Her mother refused. Leigh even offered to do it herself and paint
the room with babysitting money. Again her mother refused. It
was only when Leigh and Casey devised a method for getting a layer of mold to
grow under the wallpaper by way of water guns and a humidifier that Leigh’s
mother felt compelled to take it down.
Casey started to ask Leigh why it didn’t occur to her that bringing a
roach clip into a bedroom with Strawberry Shortcake wallpaper in its recent memory
bank was ever anything but a debacle of an idea. But then she thought better of it. “It still seems like an unjust sentence
for a first-time offender,” she said.
Leigh took
another bite of chicken. “They said
it’s because of the roach clip. If
it was just the concert they might not have sent me to boarding school but the
clip’s what did it.”
“Do your
parents have any idea what goes on at boarding school? Roach clips are like barrettes.”
“Not at
this boarding school. This one’s
for kids who are in trouble.”
“So what, are
they going to put a monitoring bracelet on you or something?”
Leigh made
a face and pushed the plate away from her.
“You of
all people do not belong at a school like that,” Casey continued, “You do extra
credit.”
Leigh lay
her head on the counter. “They’re
going to skin me alive and make a wig out of my hair.”
“Nah. More likely the kids’ll steal your stuff
and force you to get addicted to the real drugs that got them sent there. Then you’ll have to go somewhere even
worse. Ever seen those T.V. exposés
on boot camps for screwed up kids? The ones where kids die like once a year from dehydration and inadequate
footwear? Dude that’s where
you’re headed next.”
Leigh banged
her head on the counter.
“The good
news is that you probably won’t have to take finals if you start midway through
the semester,” Casey concluded.
“Maybe we
should just not talk about it for a few minutes.”
“There might
be cute guys.”
Leigh’s
face softened. But then she looked
upset again. “Cute rapists and
murderers.”
It
suddenly hit Casey that Leigh going to boarding school meant she would,
technically, no longer have any friends at Walton. “You know the more I think about it the
more it occurs to me this whole boarding school idea is not in your best
interest.”
“No shit,”
Leigh said.
“We’ll come
up with a plan B.”
“What?”
Casey
paused. “I have no idea.”
20
A playlist for Le Runaway Extraordinnaire Leigh
Robinson – 9.26.10
1. Song 1 - “She’s Leaving Home” by The Beatles* . *But of course you knew that, right? If you didn’t know that was a Beatles
song well then THAT would be reason to ground an otherwise innocuously mannered
adolescent. But here’s something
you probably didn’t know: Paul
McCartney wrote the lyrics for it after he read a piece in the newspaper about
a runaway girl. (In real life the
guy the girl ran away with was a croupier, NOT a man from the motor
trade.) The weird-funny part is that
Paul McCartney had actually already MET this girl. She was a dance contestant on a televised
band show he and the Beatles played on a few years before. !
2. Song 2 - “Static” by Jawbox. My BANDMATE Ben mentioned this song two
days ago at BAND practice. That’s
right, band practice. Did I happen
to mention
“Did you try negotiating?”
“My parents don’t negotiate. Strawberry
Shortcake wallpaper. Remember?”
Casey grimaced at the memory of that one. When Leigh was ten her mother
wallpapered her room with a horrid pink and white wallpaper that featured a
little girl holding strawberries. It wasn’t Strawberry Shortcake per se but the resemblance was close
enough that most visitors to the room thought it was. When Leigh entered junior high she
begged her mother to take the wallpaper down. Her mother refused. Leigh even offered to do it herself and paint
the room with babysitting money. Again her mother refused. It
was only when Leigh and Casey devised a method for getting a layer of mold to
grow under the wallpaper by way of water guns and a humidifier that Leigh’s
mother felt compelled to take it down.
Casey started to ask Leigh why it didn’t occur to her that bringing a
roach clip into a bedroom with Strawberry Shortcake wallpaper in its recent memory
bank was ever anything but a debacle of an idea. But then she thought better of it. “It still seems like an unjust sentence
for a first-time offender,” she said.
Leigh took
another bite of chicken. “They said
it’s because of the roach clip. If
it was just the concert they might not have sent me to boarding school but the
clip’s what did it.”
“Do your
parents have any idea what goes on at boarding school? Roach clips are like barrettes.”
“Not at
this boarding school. This one’s
for kids who are in trouble.”
“So what, are
they going to put a monitoring bracelet on you or something?”
Leigh made
a face and pushed the plate away from her.
“You of
all people do not belong at a school like that,” Casey continued, “You do extra
credit.”
Leigh lay
her head on the counter. “They’re
going to skin me alive and make a wig out of my hair.”
“Nah. More likely the kids’ll steal your stuff
and force you to get addicted to the real drugs that got them sent there. Then you’ll have to go somewhere even
worse. Ever seen those T.V. exposés
on boot camps for screwed up kids? The ones where kids die like once a year from dehydration and inadequate
footwear? Dude that’s where
you’re headed next.”
Leigh banged
her head on the counter.
“The good
news is that you probably won’t have to take finals if you start midway through
the semester,” Casey concluded.
“Maybe we
should just not talk about it for a few minutes.”
“There might
be cute guys.”
Leigh’s
face softened. But then she looked
upset again. “Cute rapists and
murderers.”
It
suddenly hit Casey that Leigh going to boarding school meant she would,
technically, no longer have any friends at Walton. “You know the more I think about it the
more it occurs to me this whole boarding school idea is not in your best
interest.”
“No shit,”
Leigh said.
“We’ll come
up with a plan B.”
“What?”
Casey
paused. “I have no idea.”
20
A playlist for Le Runaway Extraordinnaire Leigh
Robinson – 9.26.10
1. Song 1 - “She’s Leaving Home” by The Beatles* . *But of course you knew that, right? If you didn’t know that was a Beatles
song well then THAT would be reason to ground an otherwise innocuously mannered
adolescent. But here’s something
you probably didn’t know: Paul
McCartney wrote the lyrics for it after he read a piece in the newspaper about
a runaway girl. (In real life the
guy the girl ran away with was a croupier, NOT a man from the motor
trade.) The weird-funny part is that
Paul McCartney had actually already MET this girl. She was a dance contestant on a televised
band show he and the Beatles played on a few years before. !
2. Song 2 - “Static” by Jawbox. My BANDMATE Ben mentioned this song two
days ago at BAND practice. That’s
right, band practice. Did I happen
to mention
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