facing him again following his parting words at the church. He hadn’t returned to the house following the funeral, and she couldn’t help but worry about him, hurting for his pain but also pained herself at the distance between them and the knowledge that he’d loved Julia and not her.
Instead she tried to focus on the exciting news that Max was coming home tomorrow—provided Mr Haggerty and his team were happy when they did their morning rounds. Her heart swelled with love every time she thought of him or saw him. However difficult forced proximity with Gus became, she would make the best of it and remind herself of what mattered: Max.
Further questions had been asked about Max’s unusual development, but Gus remained adamant about the date ofconception. She so wanted to believe him. Because, as painful as the knowledge was that Max had been conceived on the night Gus was meant to have been out with her , to discover Gus and Julia had been together before that would be an even more bitter pill to swallow.
She was on the stepladder, hanging the curtains she’d had made, when she heard the key in the front door. Gus was home. Wariness and anticipation filled her. What would he think of the nursery? Had she gone too far? Would Gus even bother to come upstairs when he realised she was there? A tense knot tightened in her stomach and her fingers shook as she worked her way slowly along the first row of hooks, her senses attuned to the man downstairs.
The bravado and the front of self-confidence with which she’d attempted to fool Gina and Ruth crumbled to dust. She wanted to run away and hide so that Gus couldn’t hurt her any more.
Anxious about what would happen when they came face to face again, she waited with bated breath for the sound of his footsteps climbing the stairs.
CHAPTER SEVEN
‘D AMN !’
The sound of the radio was the first thing Gus heard as he stepped inside his house and closed the front door behind him.
Holly was in the nursery.
A mix of emotions swirled inside him. The temptation to leave until she went home was huge, but he resisted, knowing it was ridiculous. Not only was it his house, but in a matter of hours she would be moving in, and as they shared the responsibility of caring for Max in the forthcoming weeks he would not be able to avoid her for ever.
If she still agreed to the plan. After the way he’d spoken to her at the funeral he wouldn’t blame her for avoiding him. He’d been much harsher than he’d intended, his emotions wound taut by the strain of the occasion and trying to maintain the role of grieving husband with the guilt it engendered.
Reluctant to face Holly, he went to the kitchen and took a can of cola from the fridge. He enjoyed a long pull of the icy drink before pressing the can to his forehead, welcoming the coldness against his skin. It had been a hot day…one that had been more difficult than he’d anticipated.
Gus closed his eyes, recalling the ordeal of the funeral. The large turnout had surprised him, while the kindness and sympathy offered by the people present had made him horriblyuncomfortable. Their condolences had rendered him awkward and stilted—and incredibly ashamed that it was not grief he felt, as everyone presumed, but relief. Not that Julia was dead—never that—but at being freed from their loveless marriage.
He cursed under his breath. What kind of man was he? They’d both been miserable these last months. He recalled the moment Julia had come to the hospital, tearfully announcing in front of his colleagues—including Holly—that she was pregnant. He’d been stunned. And still unable to remember anything of the night in question. But wishing it wasn’t true hadn’t made it go away. He’d shouldered the responsibility, determined to do the right thing.
Julia had wanted someone to take care of her, and after his own unhappy upbringing he’d been adamant his child would never grow up the same way. It had to be legally
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