takes.
Chapter 6
Quinton
I’m not sure if I’m running away from my feelings, the past, or Nova. Probably the combination of all three.
I was sitting there in a place that looks like it’s straight out of Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory, actually talking to Nova about fucking ice cream, and I have this tone in my voice, the one I used to use on Lexi, when I was trying to charm her. And Nova is smiling at me and I can tell she doesn’t smile that often by how hard it is for her. It’s like she wants to be sad, which makes me want to make her happy, maybe then I could make up for some of the sadness I put in the world.
Then her friend Delilah comes up to the booth and starts asking me about Seattle. Unlike Nova, she seems determined to get my past out of me. In fact, I think she already knows about it, but she wants to actually hear me say it. Even though I’m pretty much ripped out of my mind, the panic and the guilt gets to me as I think of Lexi and the promise I made to her. The need to escape gets to me, and I’m up and out the door, running away from my problems.
I walk all the way back to the trailer park, which is about three miles, and I’m freaking thirsty as hell and tired. After I drink a beer and smoke a bowl, I pass out on the bed and pretty much stay that way for the next few weeks, drifting in and out of reality. Somehow, in the midst of my dazedness, Nikki and I end up in my room, screwing multiple times, even though I barely remember her coming into the room. Then she lays in my bed and starts yammering about what color she should dye her hair. I keep blinking at her, wishing she’d disappear, and finally, Tristan comes in, kicks her out, and then steals his pipe back. Somewhere along the line, I start to lose my buzz, finally diving to rock bottom. I’m exhausted, and even thinking feels like a huge fucking project, but I need to find a job because I’m running out of money and weed and I need to start paying rent.
I wasn’t always this way. I use to be responsible. In fact, it was something my mom always took pride in when she was bragging to her friends. I was supposed to go to a good college, probably with Lexi, where we’d date until we graduated, then we’d get married and start our lives together. At least that was the plan. But that plan’s no longer possible, and even a plan for a day seems pretty much out of my reach.
* * *
June 28, Day 40 if Summer Break
I sit up in bed and swing my legs over the edge, stretching my arms above my head when someone knocks on the door. “Come in,” I call out, thinking it’s probably Tristan coming to lecture me again about getting out of bed.
But when the door opens up, Nova is on the other side. Her hair is pulled up, and wisps frame her face. She’s wearing a short black dress with red stripes and slender straps that show off her bare shoulders and collarbone. There’s black liner framing her blue eyes, and her full lips look glossy. But other than that I don’t think she’s wearing any makeup, because I can still see the freckles on her nose.
She stares at my bare chest as she clutches her phone in her hand, and I’m suddenly very hyperaware that I’m only in my boxers. She can see the nasty scar on my chest, leftover from the accident that nearly ripped me in half, both mentally and physically, and the tattoos on my bicep of everyone I killed that day. Her cheeks flush, but surprisingly she doesn’t leave the room. She points over her shoulder at the hallway. “I came here with Delilah, and Dylan said that you’d been back here sleeping for a quite a while and that I needed to come wake you up.”
“He did?” I shake my head. I don’t know much about Dylan, but the longer I stay here, the more I realize that he seems to like starting trouble. I stand up and head to my dresser, working to put a smile on my face. “All right, you did your job. I’m up.”
She nods and I expect her to leave, but she dithers
Chapter 6
Quinton
I’m not sure if I’m running away from my feelings, the past, or Nova. Probably the combination of all three.
I was sitting there in a place that looks like it’s straight out of Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory, actually talking to Nova about fucking ice cream, and I have this tone in my voice, the one I used to use on Lexi, when I was trying to charm her. And Nova is smiling at me and I can tell she doesn’t smile that often by how hard it is for her. It’s like she wants to be sad, which makes me want to make her happy, maybe then I could make up for some of the sadness I put in the world.
Then her friend Delilah comes up to the booth and starts asking me about Seattle. Unlike Nova, she seems determined to get my past out of me. In fact, I think she already knows about it, but she wants to actually hear me say it. Even though I’m pretty much ripped out of my mind, the panic and the guilt gets to me as I think of Lexi and the promise I made to her. The need to escape gets to me, and I’m up and out the door, running away from my problems.
I walk all the way back to the trailer park, which is about three miles, and I’m freaking thirsty as hell and tired. After I drink a beer and smoke a bowl, I pass out on the bed and pretty much stay that way for the next few weeks, drifting in and out of reality. Somehow, in the midst of my dazedness, Nikki and I end up in my room, screwing multiple times, even though I barely remember her coming into the room. Then she lays in my bed and starts yammering about what color she should dye her hair. I keep blinking at her, wishing she’d disappear, and finally, Tristan comes in, kicks her out, and then steals his pipe back. Somewhere along the line, I start to lose my buzz, finally diving to rock bottom. I’m exhausted, and even thinking feels like a huge fucking project, but I need to find a job because I’m running out of money and weed and I need to start paying rent.
I wasn’t always this way. I use to be responsible. In fact, it was something my mom always took pride in when she was bragging to her friends. I was supposed to go to a good college, probably with Lexi, where we’d date until we graduated, then we’d get married and start our lives together. At least that was the plan. But that plan’s no longer possible, and even a plan for a day seems pretty much out of my reach.
* * *
June 28, Day 40 if Summer Break
I sit up in bed and swing my legs over the edge, stretching my arms above my head when someone knocks on the door. “Come in,” I call out, thinking it’s probably Tristan coming to lecture me again about getting out of bed.
But when the door opens up, Nova is on the other side. Her hair is pulled up, and wisps frame her face. She’s wearing a short black dress with red stripes and slender straps that show off her bare shoulders and collarbone. There’s black liner framing her blue eyes, and her full lips look glossy. But other than that I don’t think she’s wearing any makeup, because I can still see the freckles on her nose.
She stares at my bare chest as she clutches her phone in her hand, and I’m suddenly very hyperaware that I’m only in my boxers. She can see the nasty scar on my chest, leftover from the accident that nearly ripped me in half, both mentally and physically, and the tattoos on my bicep of everyone I killed that day. Her cheeks flush, but surprisingly she doesn’t leave the room. She points over her shoulder at the hallway. “I came here with Delilah, and Dylan said that you’d been back here sleeping for a quite a while and that I needed to come wake you up.”
“He did?” I shake my head. I don’t know much about Dylan, but the longer I stay here, the more I realize that he seems to like starting trouble. I stand up and head to my dresser, working to put a smile on my face. “All right, you did your job. I’m up.”
She nods and I expect her to leave, but she dithers
Similar Books
