news. I had too much turmoil in my own life at the moment to consider adding more. Telling him before either of us could handle the idea would be catastrophic. That’s what I told myself, anyway.
“Forever, I think.” I gazed off into the pasture at the horses grazing there. It probably sounded odd coming from my lips, but I’d come to appreciate small town life--the-everyone-knows-everyone-and-would-band-together-to-protect-one-of-its-own aspect. “I want Kieran to grow up here, like I did.” I shrugged. “My company headquarters is here and my family.” And you. Why can’t I just say the words? I practiced them in my mind, but couldn’t convince my mouth to over-rule my apprehension.
He smiled. “A lot’s changed since you’ve been gone.”
Boy, did I have news for him, but I decided to play along. For a minute, I wanted the normal other people had. “Yeah?”
“Oh, yeah.” His forehead crinkled as he compressed his lips and nodded. This was his version of serious--as solemn as he ever got. “We got a new water fountain at the high school.” He looked at me from the corner of his narrowed eyes. “It made the front page of the paper.”
I nodded, unable to control the upward curve of my lips or the increasing beat of my heart.
“And we got a new Dairy Queen. There’s even been talk of a supercenter.” He leaned back against the fence and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear.
I saw it coming and closed my eyes as his fingers grazed my cheek.
“Mrs. Rosenbury’s mutt had an affair with Mr. Duncan’s poodle down the street, then gave birth to seven of the ugliest pups in the history of animals.” He waved a hand in the air. “Mr. Duncan went right out and got his poodle neutered.” He finished with wide eyes and a few nods of his head.
“Wow, I missed all that?”
“Yeah. I’ll dig up the newspaper clippings for you. You can catch up with some late night reading.” He lifted one eyebrow. “Unless you have other late night activities planned.”
As I stood there with the second strongest person I knew, it was easy to forget Sean and concentrate on Simon, easy to pretend like nothing had ever come between us and I wasn’t a big old liar. “Same old Simon.”
He shrugged. “Not exactly the same.” He brought his head forward and took out the leather band holding his hair out of his face. I didn’t have to guess about the changes. The scar at his hairline said it all.
“How have you been?” I asked the question to shove my shame to a dark corner in my mind.
He shrugged, his face serious, the smile faded. “It’s slow going, but your mom helps.” My mother had been working with him for weeks to see what of his memory remained. So far, not much survived the bullet. “At least I can cover it with hair.”
My skin heated at the way I had reacted to his scar the first time I saw it, and I turned my gaze to face him completely. He’d been newly recovered, and I’d been my horrible self, saying ugly things to him about the scar, using insults to protect my breaking heart. “Simon, the day in the bakery”--I moved closer and pushed his hair off his forehead, revealing the star shaped scar--“I was upset because you were with someone else again . I should have held it together and not taken all my crap out on you. I’m sorry.” I pressed a kiss to the scar and gasped when he pulled me against him.
“Seriously?” He leaned against the fence. “That’s all I get, after all this time? You kiss my scar?” My eyebrows drew together as he continued. “I have two perfectly good lips right here and you go for my scar?”
I shook my head. “I’m married, Simon.”
He nodded and dropped his arms, setting me free enough to step back if I was so inclined. Which I wasn’t, no matter what I’d just said.
“I know.”
“I can’t do this.” Even if I wanted to more than I wanted to draw another breath.
“Because you love him?”
I blew out a breath on a dry laugh.
“Forever, I think.” I gazed off into the pasture at the horses grazing there. It probably sounded odd coming from my lips, but I’d come to appreciate small town life--the-everyone-knows-everyone-and-would-band-together-to-protect-one-of-its-own aspect. “I want Kieran to grow up here, like I did.” I shrugged. “My company headquarters is here and my family.” And you. Why can’t I just say the words? I practiced them in my mind, but couldn’t convince my mouth to over-rule my apprehension.
He smiled. “A lot’s changed since you’ve been gone.”
Boy, did I have news for him, but I decided to play along. For a minute, I wanted the normal other people had. “Yeah?”
“Oh, yeah.” His forehead crinkled as he compressed his lips and nodded. This was his version of serious--as solemn as he ever got. “We got a new water fountain at the high school.” He looked at me from the corner of his narrowed eyes. “It made the front page of the paper.”
I nodded, unable to control the upward curve of my lips or the increasing beat of my heart.
“And we got a new Dairy Queen. There’s even been talk of a supercenter.” He leaned back against the fence and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear.
I saw it coming and closed my eyes as his fingers grazed my cheek.
“Mrs. Rosenbury’s mutt had an affair with Mr. Duncan’s poodle down the street, then gave birth to seven of the ugliest pups in the history of animals.” He waved a hand in the air. “Mr. Duncan went right out and got his poodle neutered.” He finished with wide eyes and a few nods of his head.
“Wow, I missed all that?”
“Yeah. I’ll dig up the newspaper clippings for you. You can catch up with some late night reading.” He lifted one eyebrow. “Unless you have other late night activities planned.”
As I stood there with the second strongest person I knew, it was easy to forget Sean and concentrate on Simon, easy to pretend like nothing had ever come between us and I wasn’t a big old liar. “Same old Simon.”
He shrugged. “Not exactly the same.” He brought his head forward and took out the leather band holding his hair out of his face. I didn’t have to guess about the changes. The scar at his hairline said it all.
“How have you been?” I asked the question to shove my shame to a dark corner in my mind.
He shrugged, his face serious, the smile faded. “It’s slow going, but your mom helps.” My mother had been working with him for weeks to see what of his memory remained. So far, not much survived the bullet. “At least I can cover it with hair.”
My skin heated at the way I had reacted to his scar the first time I saw it, and I turned my gaze to face him completely. He’d been newly recovered, and I’d been my horrible self, saying ugly things to him about the scar, using insults to protect my breaking heart. “Simon, the day in the bakery”--I moved closer and pushed his hair off his forehead, revealing the star shaped scar--“I was upset because you were with someone else again . I should have held it together and not taken all my crap out on you. I’m sorry.” I pressed a kiss to the scar and gasped when he pulled me against him.
“Seriously?” He leaned against the fence. “That’s all I get, after all this time? You kiss my scar?” My eyebrows drew together as he continued. “I have two perfectly good lips right here and you go for my scar?”
I shook my head. “I’m married, Simon.”
He nodded and dropped his arms, setting me free enough to step back if I was so inclined. Which I wasn’t, no matter what I’d just said.
“I know.”
“I can’t do this.” Even if I wanted to more than I wanted to draw another breath.
“Because you love him?”
I blew out a breath on a dry laugh.
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